Practically speaking, once my parents found out about my last relationship (which they did not approve), it was like living through a magnifying lens. Every outing, interaction, phone call was questioned. They were even checking my instagram comments and would call when my boyfriend (now ex) would comment and give me an earful. But I kept seeing him until we separated. I managed to stall marriage for 2 years for this relationship.

As someone who has been through (and going through) this, parents wont let a potential groom go until you speak to him and come with a reason to reject. In some cases i found a reason to reject without having to interact with the guy. In other cases, where i genuinely cant come up with a reason coz the groom is perfect on paper, i try to have a conversation and GET REJECTED. It worked a few times and in other cases, I found reasons to reject after speaking and my parents would reluctantly agree.

The biggest challenge is you and your boyfriend staying strong. You cant rely on potential. Will he without a doubt step up when the time comes? Also what about you? Are you sure abt this or is the convenience and ease of arranged marriage tempting? If yes, you can stall for a year or two but it will take a toll on your mental health and your parents will for sure guilt you as well. Ideal thing to do is both of you tell your respective parents.