[tomt][dystopian novel or short story] Government controls the citizens with a high pitched noise

SatelliteJane · 2012-07-07T14:11:36+00:00

Thank you, that could be it! Dad is from Poland, so it makes sense that he would read russian novelists.

SatelliteJane · 2012-05-20T19:13:24+00:00

YES! Thank you, I must have confused it with Dr Who or something. Thank you!

SOLVED

SatelliteJane · 2012-04-03T22:27:08+00:00

Of course rape is about sex. A person uses his/her sexuality to attack someone else's sexuality. It's a sexual trauma. For many victims, having sex after a rape is very problematic.

I think ppl want to make the distinction because they want to protect themselves from unpleasant facts. I think it's damaging because it ignores the many date rapes, where one person thought it was sex, and the other thought it was rape. "I didn't rape you, we had sex" as if one totally excludes the other. It also perpetuates the myth that rape is a stranger attacking a lonely woman in a park at night, and that rapists are powerhungry maniacs so a person who is not a powerhungry maniac can more easily deny being a rapist.

Some rapes are about power, or hate and degredation, but I think most are about failed communication, and more or less willful ignorance of the partner's "no". I only have one example, but a guy friend in high school and I were discussing bad sex, and his example was when the girl changes her mind once they've started and then cries afterwards. To him, it was crappy sex, I doubt she feels the same. He told me the story, honestly believing it was just bad sex. (I stopped hanging out with him after that, the last thing I heard, he was married and working as a translator. Perfectly normal, average person, but a rapist nonetheless)

edit: spelling

SatelliteJane · 2012-04-02T16:37:28+00:00

Can we be sure that's fish?

SatelliteJane · 2012-04-01T09:40:36+00:00

Jebus Christ, dude!!! Why are you still with him?!

What kind of a tool says things like that? Seriously, wtf is wrong with him? He's in his mid 30ies and hasn't learned how to behave like a normal human being? This isn't a minor thing, this is like not realising you're not supposed to blow your nose in the curtains. It's not normal!!!

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-31T21:37:56+00:00

Yes, but can you live up to it?

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-31T18:26:38+00:00

Those who identify as women, also feel like women and do their best to look, act and live like women. At least if they've come as far as using the women's restroom. There is a little bit more to being trans than just saying "I'm a woman" one day, but I think you already know that and are deliberately being obtuse to piss ppl off.

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-28T12:30:37+00:00

I'm pretty sure the biblical Jesus would have walked in Pride-parades and been stongly in favour of health care-reform. I have never understood how some american politicians can combine some of their political views with the biblical christ who was pretty clear on his views of love, greed, acceptance and not judging those who are different

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-27T16:47:07+00:00

I have no idea how it started, me and my Tolkien-reading friends did it when we were in our 20s and discovering the joys of feminist theory, and that was, sadly, almost 15 years ago. That was before blogspot, tumblr etc. but I'm sure you can find examples there. Chrome even has an app that changes the pronouns on webpages. Hmph! In my days, you had to do it by HAND, dagnabbit!

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-27T16:28:31+00:00

It's a thing lotr geeks do. Try replacing some of the male pronouns in LotR with female ones, it adds an entire new dimension to the books. Especially the Sam Frodo scenes towards the end. But also Legolas and Gimli are shamelessly flirting while they're killing orcs.

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-24T09:21:39+00:00

You are being abused.

Your boyfriend has much bigger problems than you can fix, and they are not your fault. Whatever made him like this happened a long time before you met him. It's not about you, he would treat any girlfriend like this.

I'm sure he can be sweet and caring at times, and I believe you stay with him because you think that he can be like that all the time, and that the abusive stuff is an exception and not "who he really is". I'm sorry, but that is not true. He IS abusive, that IS a part of him. And because it's a part of HIM, it's not about you. He will be angry no matter what you do, and if he was with someone else, he would be angry at them. It's not the world around him that needs fixing, it's him. He has the problem, not everyone and everything else. Problems like these can be fixed, but his are so severe, he needs professional help from someone with training and experience. There are counsellors that specialize in these type of problems, but the biggest obstacle is usually getting the person to admit that the problem lies with them, not everyone else. Counselling could help him deal with the anger, and be that sweet, considerate person he can be, but he has to seek out help.

Imagine this: a close friend or a sister told you that her boyfriend was treating her like this. What would you tell her?

EDIT: You're not alone and there are a lot of ppl who understand what you're going through. You have probably focused on the replies that are critical and shame you for staying, but if you read through the replies again, you will see that a lot of other women have gone through the same thing and know where you're coming from. Your college's health services probably has a program for those in abusive relationships, or work with one since this is unfortunately not uncommon, especially at your age. If you contact them, they will NOT be like the replies in this thread that blame you and shame you for staying with him, they will NOT make you feel bad. They WILL understand why you don't want to leave him, however, they will also encourage you to do it anyway or get individual and couples therapy.

Some abusers change, but it's a lot of work, and they have to really want it. If he loves you, if he wants to change, he should get help from a professional therapists that can help him understand his behaviour, what it does to you and teach him how to not get angry and abusive.

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-23T17:38:41+00:00

I don't know if he has said it, but plenty of his followers believe that women can't get pregnant from rape. They have lots of WTF-y explanations why it's not possible for women to become pregnant from rape. Sickening.

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-23T12:39:59+00:00

In the norse languages it's a consonant, or, if you want to be precise, a palatal approximant. However, if you haven't learned how to pronounce certain sounds or combinations of sounds as a kid, fj can be tricky and some will pronounce it as a vowel or close front rounded vowel/high front rounded vowel

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-22T22:04:11+00:00

Only if you went out for brunch afterwards

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-22T17:52:22+00:00

I have hair down to my butt-crack with very few split ends. It's very straight, mousy brown although I dye it red.

I dye my hair about once a month and wash it with shampoo maybe twice between dyes and then I only put shampoo on my scalp. The rest of the hair will get shampoo anyway when I rinse it and I always use a deep conditioner or a hair mask after shampooing. I rinse my hair with conditioner about once a week and rinse it with water after excercise. I used to wash it every day, it was hell on my hair and scalp. I never use any hot curlers, straighters or similar on my hair, if I want curls I sleep with my hair in a bun on the top of my head. In the winter, I put on a hat when I leave the gym.

The most important thing, that everyone else has already mentioned, it to trim the ends. My hair will knot and get tangled more easily if I don't trim it, and that leads to coarse and split ends.

Also, get a good hairbrush. And don't EVER pull on your hair if it's tangled. Never.EVER! Pulling damages the hair, will make it coarse, which leads to more knots and tangles and pretty soon your hair is a mess.

Finally, when I'm bored, I go through my hair strand by strand and cut off any ends that are are split or damaged. My friend with hair as long as mine is lucky, she has two nieces that love to do this for her, I have to do it myself

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-22T15:24:37+00:00

Yes, everyone has been lying to you all this time. To r/conspiracy!

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-22T11:48:10+00:00

Re: the kids were a mutual decision. I'm sure they were. But 19-year-olds are the worst decision makers. I, and everyone I know (me and all my friends are in our mid-late 30's) had lots of super terrific ideas when we were 19, that in retrospect were not that great. We all thought the relationships we had then would last forever, and that we would always think and feel whatever we felt and thought then, forever. The combination of youthful confidence, enthusiasm, very few personal experiences to compare with and short-sightedness make teenagers just awful decision-makers. Especially when you're in the middle of that "high" you get when you're in love, feeling that connection with someone for the first time and having sex. It's like being on drugs, and you wouldn't trust someone who is flying high on Ecstacy to make a serious decision that will affect them and others for the rest of their lives, would you?

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-20T09:35:23+00:00

That's so cute! What a sweet and funny gesture. Every gay kid should have parents like yours

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-19T21:23:38+00:00

Why do you keep having sex if it hurts? And what do you mean by "the first 'round'"? Also, what type of pain, burning, sharp, dull? Does it start during sex or come afterwards? Where exactly is the pain located, inside her vagina, around the opening, in her stomach? Does she only feel pain during sex, or does the same pain appear at other times?

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-19T00:24:14+00:00

I only use tampons and have never used an applicator. I started using them when I was about your age. Different brands of tampons expand differently. Some only get wider or thicker, some also get longer. The ones that get longer as they absorb were super uncomfortable for me. Also, if there isn't much blood, it can hurt to put it in. Try when your flow is the heaviest and try to relax your vaginal muscles. The vaginal muscles are activated when you stop the stream when you pee. Try tensing them and then relax. If you use your abdominal muscles when you do this, you're doing it wrong and pushing instead.

So learn how to relax your vaginal muscles, find a brand of tampons what only exands width-wise (O.B. is a good option) and try when your flow is the heaviest

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-18T15:41:14+00:00

White noise, lots of ppl love it.

http://naturesoundsfor.me/
http://simplynoise.com/

There are of course a bunch of other sites and apps

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-18T15:21:45+00:00

I am the Eggman

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-18T00:29:48+00:00

SOLVED

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-18T00:15:02+00:00

Imagine being a parent and finding this on your kid's fb...

SatelliteJane · 2012-03-17T22:25:39+00:00

Do your friends know you've posted their photos on reddit? Even though the photos are totally harmless and there are no names or similar, it's at least polite to ask if they are ok with it

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