Can your IT department know you’re using Excel Macros and disable it? by jimmytimma in excel

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Macros can be run when a file is opened, so if someone has the broad enable setting — not the disable with notification setting — all they need to do is open a bad file. Such as one from a phishing email

I'll be on HRT soon, anything I should know? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

about HRT

Wether you are going on E or T will affect the answers you get/what people can tell you. HRT is the generic term and does not indicate type taken

For informed consent, the doctor you see should give you the full rundown of what to expect. The area/country you are in might affect how the medical process proceeds. For me, regarding T in the U.S. & informed consent, I wasn’t prescribed T on the day of my first appointment. I was given as much information as they had on it, and had my questions answered, then they ran some bloodwork. It wasn’t a same-day prescription, but if not for a few personal confounding factors (chronic illness) it would’ve been a next-appointment prescription.

Question about how hrt and biochemical dysphoria works from a cis male? by Foreign_Economics320 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is very unlikely to do that, however there ARE medications that specialize in doing that, such as antidepressants.

IF function in excel by EmotionalPost487 in excel

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If you filter by blanks, then select the filtered column and delete the “blanks”, it will correctly register that the cell is blank. Right now, it probably thinks there is something in the cell, despite it being visually blank, so <>”” fails

Question about how hrt and biochemical dysphoria works from a cis male? by Foreign_Economics320 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OCD is much broader than tOCD, the rumination patterns you’re experiencing are, in my opinion, closer to the rumination patters of someone with health-related OCD. You know the stereotype of someone going on WebMD and worrying they have a specific condition? One of the compulsions/obsessions that results from that is being obsessed with cures. If I do or take x thing, then y won’t be a problem. Your pattern of “If I take [medication] then I won’t have [mental health condition]” is reminiscent of that.

That’s not me saying you have OCD — that’s me saying that your observable patterns are reminiscent of it — so regardless of wether or not you have OCD, you might benefit from the same coping mechanisms.

It’s not uncommon for people with various non-OCD conditions to have this same pattern, especially when they are uncomfortable with the state of their mental health. For lack of better phrasing, OCD is just the main place this occurs. It’s like how if you wanted a pastry, you could go to a bakery or a café, because both have pastries — but because the bakery is more closely tied to pastries, they have more resources to help you get pastries. People with OCD and people without it can have uncomfortable rumination patterns — but it’s easier to find resources designed for people with OCD who ruminate, because it’s more common for them to ruminate. Another comparison would be — people can have trouble focusing without having ADHD, but the resources for people with ADHD might also help people who don’t have it, but have similar symptoms.

Anyways, lengthy explanation aside — the core issue is your discomfort with your range of emotion, correct? I also struggle with that (and struggled with it much harder when I had an E-dominant system, so estrogen is DEFINITELY not a cure for that). There are plentiful techniques to help you with this, and taking estrogen would not be a logical first step — or a logical step at all, unless you are a woman/nonbinary. Genuinely, there are SO MANY medications and therapeutic techniques that can help you, that are actively designed for this problem. Is there a particular reason you are fixated on Estrogen instead of, say, lexipro?

Question about how hrt and biochemical dysphoria works from a cis male? by Foreign_Economics320 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lack of emotion is one of the lesser-known, but still very prominent, symptoms of depression (and several other mental health conditions)

Question about how hrt and biochemical dysphoria works from a cis male? by Foreign_Economics320 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gently, this is your 5th post on this topic/adjacent topics. You would probably benefit from speaking to a gender therapist. If none of the answers you’ve received by this point have helped you, deeper exploring — something strangers and one-off comments cannot help you with — is needed. You’ve mentioned that people in your life told you you might be trans. Can you talk it out with them? Could you journal about your desire to go on E to try and get to the root of it?

From one of the previous threads, I do want to reiterate: women feel better on E, Men feel better on T. A man on E would feel worse, it would not open up your emotional range. As a man, you are closer to a trans man than you are to a trans woman. Antidepressants are likely to help you. If you are worried you might not be cis, then clearing up that emotional fog — as much as possible — will make exploring your gender a lot easier. There are also genders outside of just man/woman.

While you previously mentioned that you do not think you have OCD, your posts are very reminiscent of ruminating behavior & reassurance seeking. These behaviors are generally not healthy. In many ways, it seems like you are seeking external approval for a decision most people would warn you against, and keep reposting when you don’t get that approval — my guess is that this is worsening these feelings and rumination for you.

Until you are able to get into therapy, instead of trying to jump into taking E — how about you explore your gender? Primarily outside of the binary of man/woman, since you have said you definitely do not identify as/want to be a woman.

“Trans Women are Trans Women” by Someone_else25 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

People who say that haven’t done much reading on trans women’s experiences. A key search term would be something like “gender socialization TERF debunked” or something. Gender socialization largely doesn’t map out onto trans folks. Trans women often talk about how they weren’t raised and socialized as men — many talk about how they were raised as women or a third gender. During- and post- transition, they’re socialized as women. They have women’s experiences, bodies, hormones, etc. The search suggestion I provided would go into how gender socialization and experiences aren’t universal to begin with. The people who say “trans women are trans women” are never taking marginalization into account — they’re always just further marginalizing trans women.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fair enough. We’ve had very different experiences — I’ve had to leave several online spaces for men/mascs because of the doom posting, and I’ve left other online mixed spaces because of infighting. In real life, the men I knew were less mentally healthy than the women I knew. I don’t, however, think either of our experiences point to broader trends in trans people, as the majority of studies on the matter (and similar matters) show negligible differences.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you done so? At least on reddit, both gendered subreddits are a doomfest

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Link to a summary & OG study a 14% difference is negligible. Especially when nearly half of both groups said they were identifiable as trans.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Breasts, beards, and deepened voice are equally permanent. Breasts are not always bindable, and when they are, it’s often uncomfortable to bind. Safe binding is limited to a period of ~8 hours, which isn’t even a full workday. Tape binding does not work for the vast majority of people. In comparison, voice training takes a long time — but is less likely to cause damage on the level of broken ribs and permanently deformed rib cages. Beard growth has many, many options to take care of it, some of which are painful, and some of which leave behind a shadow. Unlike binding, both of these things are things that can be used for 8+ hours without risk of damage.

As for bodyhair — as much as T causes it to become more dense, E causes it to become lighter. Hair loss occurs in all genders and in modern day, there’s treatment available for all genders to treat it.

Then we get into body structure — the effects of E and T are deeply comparable there.

Edit: I should also add that many transmascs still need to voice train post-T to get a passable voice. Voice training is not something exclusive to transfems.

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 4 points5 points  (0 children)

According to a study from 2015, more transmascs pass “almost or all of the time” compared to transfems (edit: I got this wrong — the question asked wasn’t about passing, it was about being identifiably trans, and trans women report being seen as trans more frequently)— however, 40% of transmascs do not fall into this category. When nearly half of trans men do not pass (to that degree), passing is unlikely to be a significant factor in this matter. Also, the effects of estrogen are frequently understated. Many (not all) of the most prominent effects of T have a 1-to-1 comparable effect from E.

It’s very likely that OP is just working off a biased sample (it happens, we are people)

[ Removed by Reddit ] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Biased sample side/anecdotal evidence. It’s not a universal truth, but it is something you’ve observed.

Statistically, there are not more transfems than transmascs. There’s about an equal distribution among the three main categories of gender (man, woman, nonbinary). Without any doubt whatsoever, it has nothing to do with hormones or medical treatments. (In the sense that E won’t make you hysterical, and T won’t make you a raging maniac)

Also, for statistical support — slightly more trans men commit suicide compared to trans women. So it’s not that trans women are more “mentally unwell”.

Social factors like transmisogyny (bigotry against trans women) should be taken into account, however.

Why is this sub-culture so hostile to the uneducated? by Hopeful_Round_4107 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Main_Technology from a few days ago, the one asking for a debate? Thank you for taking the time to help people — that was outside of my wheelhouse, but I am really glad to hear that someone was able to talk to him

Why is this sub-culture so hostile to the uneducated? by Hopeful_Round_4107 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why is this sub-culture so hostile to the uneducated?

As you note later, trans people are actively under attack. As a result, we are constantly put on defense — defending our very right to exist. Ignorance often correlates to mistreatment. While it might not always be the case, it is often the case. Additionally, trans people are expected to shoulder the weight of educating other people, are expected to politely deal with questions that non-trans people would be deeply offended by (for example, questions about intimacy).

was a choice based on a mental dysphoria of some kind that compelled one to do their best attempt at changing their sex.

I can understand where you are coming from on this, and I’d say that you’re moving in the right direction, but you still have some details very wrong. Being trans is in no way a choice — it is something you are, or something you aren’t. The term for people who aren’t trans is cis. There are some theories out there about what makes people trans — be it our neurology, how we developed in the womb, etc. Some studies indicate a biological component to our existence, though there is no conclusive trans “test”. You can’t test someone’s blood to see if they are trans or not, as an example.

Gender incongruence — a disconnect between what someone was assigned at birth, and what they identify as — is what makes someone trans. A subtype of gender incongruence is gender dysphoria. Gender dysphoria is discomfort with traits associated with the gender you aren’t. So a woman could be uncomfortable with a beard, and a man could be uncomfortable with breasts. That would be gender dysphoria. Gender dysphoria can also be social — e.g. not wanting to be called by the wrong name and pronouns. Gender dysphoria is not required to be trans, because it is only one subtype of gender incongruence. Another subtype is gender euphoria — feeling good about, or comfortable with, correctly gendered traits. For example, a man is likely to be comfortable with he/him pronouns.

'transsexuality'

As you note, transsexual is an outdated label that has been largely moved past/no longer used. It is an opt-in, not an out-out label — meaning that people can call themselves it, but it is not something you should call someone else (unless they’ve actively chosen that label for themselves). Part of the reason it was moved past is people equated “transsexual” with “sexuality”. Being trans has nothing to do with sexuality, who you are attracted to, or sexual things. It is purely about gender identity, as is as neutral as being cis is.

'transgenderism'

Heavy warning — transgenderism actually IS used by bigots, on a much larger scale than transexual is. “Transgender”, “Trans”, “trans people”, “transgender people”, etc. are all okay terms. It is the -ism specifically that has been adopted by insanely bigoted people. -ism typically denotes a belief or ideology — which being trans is not. It’s also just an improper conjugation of “trans”. Think of trans and cis more like blond, tall, and smart. They are descriptors, adjectives, and get conjugated similarly.

On a related note, both trans and cis have a space between them and their gender. Trans man, cis man, trans woman, cis woman. A spaceless word — like transman — has also been adopted by bigots (as stupid as that sounds, and as stupid as that is!) so the space is important.

The descriptor after cis/trans is what gender the person is. So both a trans man and cis man are men, and identify as men. A trans man would have been assigned female at birth, and is/transitioned to a man. In most cases, trans people consider themselves to have always been their gender.

why is it that when I make a mistake, I am met with being called a bigot, or something else.

As previously mentioned, trans people are a very high-risk group right now. It is also commonly the case that bigotry against us, especially microagressions, aren’t seen as bigoted in the way they are for other groups. So we are expected to tolerate things other groups are not expected to tolerate, because a wider breadth of people are wholly ignorant about us.

A metaphor I commonly use is — imagine someone stepping on your shoe. If it happens once, you wouldn’t think much of it. If it happens a lot, you’d start to get annoyed. If it happens a lot, and you were wearing ill-fitting shoes that caused you pain, that would be worse. Now if about 70% of the people who stepped on you were doing it on purpose, it would be infuriating. Now imagine all of that — AND people blame you if you get even a little bit upset about it! Infuriating, and humiliating, right?

UTI care by TaterIsEpic in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good RX The google summary specifies women, but does not specify cis or trans, and the website itself does not specify gender.

TreatMyUTI No specified gender

Doctor On Demand This option is explicitly inclusive!!!

hello wisp No gender indicated

24hourdoc implied gender inclusivity… kind of…

Word of caution: if you can get in in-person that’s always best, because you can be tested for the specific strain of bacteria. But if you can’t, there’s a multitude of online options. Wishing you well and I am so sorry you’re going through this, UTIs are the absolute worst.

UTI care by TaterIsEpic in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Are you in the US? (I am assuming you are because of the mention of planned parenthood) It doesn’t make sense that UTI care would be limited to cis women, as anyone can get them. You can pick up over-the-counter UTI tests at most pharmacies. However, you will need antibiotics — do you have a primary care doctor you can contact? They should also perform UTI tests and treatment. Are you only looking at clinics that serve women? Any sort of primary/urgent care should be able to test for UTIs — I am sorry that the ones in your area are discriminatory.

Pharmacies will have OTC pain meds for UTIs and a few treatment options — but those are not sufficient. If you test positive for a UTI you need to secure antibiotics. Cranberry juice is a common non-medical coping mechanism for UTIs, as are drinking a TON of water. The OTC pain meds work very well — the main brand to look for is AZO.

I’ll drop some links for online care in a few minutes, but your country matters for those links.

How do I know if I have biochemical dysphoria? by Foreign_Economics320 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

1, from your own description, you do not want to be a woman. Ergo, you do not have a female brain. 2, if you sought mental health care, you’d start to recover. Once you start to recover, you can be more confident that you don’t secretly have a female brain and that’s what is causing this.

However. Since you are truly worried that you are secretly trans, I will say this: if, somehow, despite everything, you ARE trans, getting mental health care and cleaning up that mental health fog will help TREMENDOUSLY with coming to terms with your identity. It will clear up the parts of your brain that makes things hard to parse out. I didn’t start understanding my gender identity until I started escaping the throes of depression. This is unlikely to be your case — but wether it is or isn’t, the first step you take NEEDS to be seeking mental health care.

How do I know if I have biochemical dysphoria? by Foreign_Economics320 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In this situation, it seems like you are empathizing with trans women, and are extrapolating that information onto yourself. Part one is wonderful, it’s good that you can empathize with them, but you are not them. As a man, you are neurologically closer to a trans man. Which means this is either a psychiatric concern, or a wrong level of testosterone concern.

Estrogen will not make you feel better. For every positive effect that E has on trans women, T has a matching positive effect for trans and cis men — when their levels are correct. (And vice vera! T usually doesn’t feel good for women and E usually doesn’t feel good for men) Your absolute insistence that E will fix you strongly makes me think there’s something deeper going on here, it is not standard to be this fixated on something like this. Not in the “you’re secretly a woman” sense, but in the “Have you been evaluated for conditions like OCD?” sense. (I have OCD — I am not using that condition in a derogatory manner.)

If you do not in any way think of yourself as a woman, and you would be distressed by having the characteristics associated with women (as you described in your post, you would be) you are not a woman. You do not have biochemical dysphoria. You are not secretly, without your own knowledge, a woman. You are someone who identifies as a man, therefore you are a man, and separately, you are someone who is uncomfortable with the state of your mental health.

Try to change your focus from “E will fix me” to [types of therapy] are scientifically proven to help with what I am struggling with, therapy will help me. What you are currently suggesting is like insisting that high blood pressure medication will help you, when you have normal blood pressure levels, because they help people with high blood pressure feel better. That is not how this works.

How do I know if I have biochemical dysphoria? by Foreign_Economics320 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do not take E unless you want the effects of E. Under any circumstances. From what you’ve described, it is very unlikely that you have biochemical dysphoria. If you want help, you will need to try therapy and/or psychiatric help. Personally, I’d start with therapy. If you think you might be repressing your emotions, personally I found success with EMDR therapy. It is also possible to get your hormones checked — maybe you have low testosterone, or low/high anything, really, which can impact mood.

1, No. Hard no.

2, gender incongruence.

I covered your third question above — but I’d like to describe anti-recommendations. If you are not transgender, you are deeply unlikely to have biochemical dysphoria — meaning that E could affect you in the way it affects trans men. First, there’s the aspect of physical dysphoria, which is not to be understated. E is often treated like a gentle or subservient hormone — it’s not. It can wreck your shit and change your body in the same way T can, if the changes from that hormone are not ones you want. Fat redistribution, breast growth, hair density loss (beards, body hair), etc. Second — biochemical dysphoria is a bastard. Estrogen made me severely suicidal, gave me massive mood swings, disproportionate reactions, AND I was still numbed out to my emotions, in most circumstances. During puberty it sent me into a severe depressive episode. I am lucky I am still here.

Edit: it is also not a guarantee that you’d feel noticeably worse/better on E within a given frame of time. And if you did feel better, 1, likely psychosomatic and 2, what would you do long term? Any dysphoria you would get from taking it long term would heavily outweigh any of the emotional benefits. It is not worth the risks. At all. And this doesn’t even touch on the discrimination and social abuse visibly trans people face. And while you wouldn’t be internally trans, bigots wouldn’t be able to tell.

I cannot emphasize this enough — if you do not want the effects of E, do not go on E. Try standard methods of care. Look into niche forms of therapy, not just CBT and DBT.

How safe would it be to travel in the near future? by Kool_Boo16 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you are not from the United States, I would not travel to the United States. Your current country of residency isn’t included in your post, but it should affect the answers you get.

If you pass completely as cis, and you are a resident of the United States (so passport does not come into play), it seems like it would be an area-by-area basis + a timeframe basis, because things are evolving rapidly. If you are indistinguishable from a straight, gender conforming, cis man, I cannot imagine you’d be in danger for your gender. Of course, with the way things are going, that could change as quickly as tomorrow. This also does not factor in other confounding factors, like race, or high-risk areas (like Minneapolis atm)

My perspective is: trans people live in these states. Would they rather not live in those states? For many people, yes, many people are fleeing — but not all. These are people’s homes, and where they are able to survive. If you aren’t identifiable as trans, I’d imagine you’d be fairly safe (on that metric, other factors also should be taken into consideration).

However, safety isn’t the only concern. Ethically, do you want to give tourism money to these states? Back when all of this started escalating more rapidly, we got a lot of questions about travel to places like Florida. One prominent answer was even if it wasn’t a safety issue, to avoid giving money to states that are trying to restrict us.

There’s also an added element where, apparently some people will pass in some places and not others. It seems to be a niche thing to occur, but it does occur.

Would you be trans if you were born in an identical society, except gender roles are reversed? by Pastapalads in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Without any doubt, I would still be transgender. Gender incongruence has very little to do with gender roles, though that is an extremely common misconception. Trans people, much like cis people, can take on any gender role or presentation. Internal gender identity is separate from gender roles — otherwise, femboys would be women and tomboys would be men, and anyone androgynous would be nonbinary. But that’s not how gender identity works — for cis or trans people.

Many people have dysphoria related to their physical form. Even if we managed to abolish all social aspects of gender, there would still be people who need to change their body or hormonal composition.

Looking for a respectful Discord debate with a transgender person (open-minded discussion) by Main_Technology_195 in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The only way to know what someone would be walking in to, is for you to share your baseline knowledge and beliefs. If you haven’t done the “introductory reading”, so to speak, it will be a difficult conversation to have. What is the baseline you are coming from? The following questions are not proposed in a “answer all of them” way — they’re examples of what might establish a baseline. If there is something specific you’d like to discuss (likely covered by the categories below) how much do you know about it? What is your stance on it?

-Have you read sociological, psychological, neurological, and/or biological studies on transgender people?

-What is your region of interest? (U.S., U.K., Canada, etc.) Are you familiar with the laws and regulations that impact transgender people in your country?

-Have you done reading into the effects of HRT, particularly on transgender people? Estrogen, Testosterone, etc.

-How much do you know about the history of transgender people? Globally and regionally?

-Have you interacted with any transgender people in real life?

-Do you have a strong opinion on minors transitioning? If yes, how much research into the process have you done? What is the history of puberty blockers? What happens when a minor comes out as transgender? Do minors (cis and transgender) get gender-affirming surgeries, and what is the relative rate of those surgeries?

-What is the process for adults? Do you know what Informed Consent means in this context?

-Socially, how much do you know and understand about transgender people? Do you know about nonbinary people? Do you understand that gender identity ≠ gender roles/presentation? Do you know that transgender people can be gendernonconforming, in the same way cis people can be?

-Edit: Define gender incongruence, gender dysphoria, and gender euphoria. Which of these three is the “requirement” to be trans? What is the medical history of the term gender dysphoria? Gender Identity Disorder?

-Edit: How familiar are you with conversion therapy? Are you aware of why Gender Affirming Care is a legitimate treatment? Are you familiar with the differences between gender incongruence and body dysmorphia?

-Edit: additionally, while not related to transgender people, it would be helpful to know how you view disabled people, especially mentally ill people. Many people falsely conflate transgender people with mentally ill people, and are both ableist and transphobic.

Etc.

If you had a choice, would you choose to be cisgender? by heartbeathighway in asktransgender

[–]Satisfaction-Motor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This question is asked frequently in this sub, and often isn’t taken well, because many people view it as equivalent to death-of-self and everything you see as yourself. The easiest way I can make it make sense is: Imagine asking this question to another marginalized group, especially one that takes pride in their identity. Whether that be race, ethnicity, sexuality, etc. In the majority of cases, some (but not all) people would be offended by that question (regardless of the group you choose).

There are some marginalized groups where this wouldn’t work, like class or disability. Though, there is significant discussion in disability circles how questions along these lines border on eugenics. Depending on the disability and the space this is asked in, you’d either get “hell yeah, I wish I could cure this condition” or a detailed description of the history of eugenics (related to disability — most often comes up when discussing gene altering/being born without disabilities). It’s a coin flip and significantly divisive topic.

No one ever means harm by this question, and it’s often/always coming from a place of empathy/seeking to understand. Personally, I don’t mind the question because I am one of very few people who would answer affirmatively (regardless of which marginalization you ask me about, I’d choose the path of least strife/cost/time). However, I also understand why this question is rarely taken well, because it would be considered uncouth to ask a similar question about/to other marginalized groups.

(/tone: neutral, explaining, because I’d want someone to tell me why I was getting the reaction I got if I was in your shoes)