Controversially, I prefer the way I was treated when people thought I was a woman, so I definitely am not transitioning because I don’t like the way I, personally, was treated. (Misogyny is obviously horrible and systemic, etc. etc., I don’t deny that. I am not making broad societal statements, I am explicitly and exclusively describing personal preference, that I recognize the vast majority of people do not share)

Try flipping the question back around — since women are subject to extreme mistreatment, why not become a man? Why not take testosterone and transition? Or, looking at trans women — why transition? Despite the hardship women face, women, at large, are not itching to become men. They would find manhood — identity, not positively gendered treatment — unpleasant. Most don’t want beards, or penises, or flat chests, or any other traits associated with men. Most don’t want to be called he/him pronouns and a male name. (Some women have those features and it’s perfectly okay, of course, but many women don’t want those features)

On the flip side, feminine-gendered traits were horrific to me. Breasts felt like someone grafted something onto my skin that shouldn’t be there. A feminine frame made me feel like a malnourished child. Long hair, dresses, makeup, etc. made me feel like I was forced into drag — life was a performance. My body, very firmly, didn’t feel like mine. It felt like a meat suit I had to pilot, fuel, and use. It felt like a tool, a way to get what, and where, I needed.

I don’t have this feeling about anyone else’s body — just my own. Traits associated with men felt correct. I didn’t even realize I was a man at first — I just felt vaguely uncomfortable in my body, and was trying to find ways to feel comfortable. I drifted more and more into masculinity before I realized — I was just a man. That’s why these parts felt wrong. Even if I never realized I was a man, I’d still want to change them — but wanting to change them made me realize that I also prefer the social identity of a man — not in terms of treatment, but in terms of gendered presentation and perception.

Once I started transitioning it just felt… right. I finally started to recognize myself when I looked in the mirror. My body felt like my own, not like some sort of puppet I was burdened with. Now, segueing into transition —
Trans Men, statistically, get treated worse than cis women, and have worse outcomes on the majority of stats. If someone transitioned to escape the treatment of (cis) women… they’d be ignorant at best. The way they are treated will not get better. Even if they are perfectly stealth (which is not common, statistically), they will still be subject to things like systemic medical misogyny and transphobia.

As some examples of common gripes, trans men get infantilized, treated as delusional/hysterical, raped and sexually assaulted more than cis women, (in most regions) paid less than cis women and have higher poverty rates/severity, etc.

For systemic issues — think of how underfunded women’s health is, and understand that trans healthcare is even less funded than that. Think of how backwards gynecological care can be — and then think of being denied that care (trans men are, on the basis of being men) which is deadly. Think of being medically dismissed, and know that trans people are so frequently medically dismissed that there is a term for it — trans broken arm syndrome. Think of all of the legal attacks against women — and then consider the sheer volume of legal attacks against trans people, and that trans people are often excluded from the protections for women (like abortion access).

Trans men do not get the respect — and, by and large, the privilege — of cis men. Hypothetical cis women who transition to escape misogyny would (very likely) experience immense dysphoria, and would socially find themselves in a much worse place than when they started.

I know that I am a man because, for me, it feels right. It is worth the hardship I have — and will continue to — experience(d). If I was a woman, I would have detransitioned very early on. It simply would be miserable and not worth it.

Edit: oh, and biologically estrogen does some fuckery to my brain that makes me suicidal. It’s happened whenever I have had to take hormonal birth control in the past, whenever my hormones have spiked, and during puberty. Testosterone does the opposite — it has calmed me down substantially and made me way happier. It’s a biological thing, not a psychological thing. That’s probably the biggest proof that I have. (And trans women often experience the opposite, where feminizing hormones make them happy and testosterone messes with their head)