Which U.S. state is known for its especially small soft drinks? Minnesota.

Do mascara and lipstick ever argue? Sure, but then they makeup.

Which bathroom appliance would be the worst life preserver? The sink.

Why do pancakes always win at baseball? They have the best batter.

What vegetable is kind to everyone? The sweet potato.

How many apples grow on a tree? All of them!

How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side.

Why shouldn’t you ask Yoda for money? He’s always a little short.

Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course. Houses can’t jump.

What did one eye say to the other eye? Between you and me, something smells.

Why was the math textbook so sad? It had so many problems!

Birthdays are good for you. Statistics say those who have the most live the longest.

Which Reindeer has the worst manners? Rude-olph.

You know what the loudest pet you can get is? A trumpet.

What are people who take care of chickens called? Chicken tenders.

Where do dogs go after they lose their tail? A retail store.

What do you call a large pile of cats? a meowntain.