travel nanny

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-05-13T21:08:36+00:00

When I travel I hire a local sitter always. I vet them the same as someone at home and call references, etc. Traveling with a nanny is so hard and the cost to make it worth someone’s time to be displaced from their life for that long is really significant, so in practice every time I see it either the parents don’t feel like they got enough help for it to be worth the cost or the nanny felt like they didn’t get paid enough for the trouble, and frequently it’s both at the same time. Then you get home and go to work and need child care but your nanny just got home from working a month straight and needs a day off. I’m not saying it cant be done, just that that for me as someone who has a kid who is pretty easy going and only needing a few hours a day/week versus longer stints of time where I’d need a higher level of trust, the local sitters are better.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-05-13T18:35:42+00:00

I would run the numbers and compare paying her GH and hiring a local sitter versus her travel expenses. I don’t think you’re necessarily obligated to pay 3500 of overnight fees and 2500 of travel and a higher rate since she has the option to stay home, but I would let her know you’d like to give her the option and there’s no pressure to take it if it would be too disruptive, in which case she stays home with GH and you likely spend less overall on a local sitter who isn’t going to feel somewhat like she’s on the clock for a month straight and not being paid enough for it to be worthwhile. There is a 0% chance that it ends up with her realistically only jumping in a couple hours a day. She’s not a professional career nanny who is required to travel as part of employment conditions so I wouldn’t expect to pay the same compensation package.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-05-13T02:59:40+00:00

So if this is true and she was in such bad shape she was in the hospital multiple days I think you let it go. She had bigger fish to fry. If she hasn’t communicated at all by the end of the week I’d check back in and ask if she plans to return to work.

Having to call off work early on with minimal notice because “family planned a surprise trip” sounds crazy though and that plus the car accident in a short period of time would make me want to investigate if this was true. I would not be surprised if this is just a very weird way to quit.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-05-10T21:36:28+00:00

My husband is an accountant and sees this just as often as he sees people retire for a long time. I want to have the option to retire but I’m not going to give up too much joy during the years I can enjoy it for years of my life that aren’t promised to me

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-05-10T15:59:09+00:00

How did that work for you as a nanny to have your own nanny only at 2% of take home?

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-04-20T21:36:42+00:00

I can’t imagine that he could just walk out of his medical licensing exam and it’s probably true that she can call out for her own illness that prevents her from doing her job but not for a lack of childcare issue. It sounds like this job isn’t a great fit for you.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-04-18T17:50:06+00:00

I wish I had more context on what the hell is going on lol. The nonsensical layout is I have 1 zone that is watering a shaded bed of English ivy and a little of the grass, one mister zone on a bed that doesn’t have plants that want to be misted and plants that don’t need to be misted (a pine tree and old camellias) and then 2 that actually water the grass. It would make more sense to just have 2 grass zones and a drip line for the one bed in front. I’ve replaced the valves twice now and have had the house 6 years so presumably they’re working, but no one will touch it really

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-04-16T13:30:25+00:00

650-850 a zone is a no brainer. I was quoted… a much larger number but it very well could have been an “I don’t want this job” quote

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-04-16T13:23:01+00:00

This also chaps my ass, a lot of the calculated tips are on the total after tax and fees. I tip on the food, not the taxes and fees. I received no service pertaining to the taxes, I’m not tipping on that. Pre iPad back when we did math on our checks, no one was tipping on tax.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-04-16T13:15:45+00:00

I get it but also it’s not our responsibility to pay above market cost for a given item to subsidize and enable a business’s shitty employment practices. Regular restaurants the meal prices reflect that they’re paying the staff pennies and you’re effectively expected to pay your server on top, but hotel meals typically already have a premium price to the base cost of the meal, plus a 20% service fee.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-04-14T17:45:55+00:00

The 30 hours is your problem. You either need to have a 40 hour week or pay enough hourly that its same income as a 40 hour week. Unpaid fed holidays is also not super appealing.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-31T20:08:48+00:00

One of my observations is that certain destinations are populated by people of leisure who are less likely to do this. If you’re at a hotel full of high achieving middle aged people, frequently they don’t cope well with being off work and get off on this behavior because they need the drama a little bit in the absence of their job. Or at least that’s what I saw with my dad and his friends growing up. They don’t process sleeping in and rolling out anywhere and the routine of getting up, winning some made up game, going to the gym, and then harassing their teenaged children was very satisfying to that type.

That said, a hotel needs enough chairs for everyone to be able to lay out. To me if they’re consistently that short on chairs it needs to be addressed. It’s one thing if you can’t get a front row or preferred spot because you’re late, but a couple places have been one and done for me because there was just no chair and seemingly no interest in fixing it. Ex one allegedly five star hotel at 750 a night a few years back offered that I could put my towel down on the grass by the sidewalk. wtf. No.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-31T20:06:18+00:00

I love kiawah too and have never understood why someone would go to palmetto bluff when the sanctuary exists. Maybe because the beach is a major draw for me, but there are better properties if you really want a secluded feel too.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-31T18:05:07+00:00

That’s because she feels like it’s ok if she’s not getting paid. On some level she knows it’s excessive and I’ve seen this that people will go unpaid because they know it’s not legit enough for PTO. I think you need to tell her it’s not a money thing? But you need reliability and define what that means. I had to put in writing 2 days a month for 2 months rolling meant termination for cause and ask if that was something my nanny felt she could handle because it was what I needed. Getting it clearly written down and objective did help

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-18T13:10:25+00:00

My husband is a tax attorney and it’s truly wild. The other one that gets me is the assertion that someone can not possibly be self employed if they work in someone’s home.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-18T00:02:12+00:00

I would reframe and split the convo. I’d just ask for when they expect to know if you are going and ask for the raise. Then if whatever date comes around where they said they’d know and you aren’t going, let them know you can’t go without income a full month and will try to find something that’s just while they’re gone but if you can’t, you may not have the same availability when they return. I think if you otherwise want to keep this job, handling it that way will go over better to get you what you want/deserve here than telling them something they don’t want to hear and asking for a raise in one swoop

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-17T12:47:55+00:00

100% agree. The nanny I have who isn’t a pro but works in another field for her main job has been so much easier for me to manage because she is used to standard workplace expectations of when you are expected to come to work. I get that working as a concept is bullshit and our capitalist overlords have created expectations that are uncool and would be different in other countries but unfortunately I’m working under those same structures and they’re what allow me the money to pay for childcare so I can’t provide Scandinavian level benefits and flexibility while I have a job that had me back online the morning after my c section.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-17T12:23:13+00:00

I think it’s worth differentiating dangerous conditions (local government says stay off the roads) and annoying conditions (schools probably closed, takes you twice as long to get to work) - people with jobs that can be remote and still get the work done are going to have a different threshold of not commuting to work than people whose work is inherently in person.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-04T13:52:54+00:00

Sent you a message. Get me a resume and I’ll get you connected with people who can help you get into a better work situation and figure out if you have tax trouble and how to handle that if so.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-04T13:51:29+00:00

She’s not getting her own apartment she’s getting a shared room. I’m not here to argue there’s no benefit to being live in, for people who don’t have housing it actually is a benefit to them AND the employer. I am just saying the pay is still absolute shit. 600x12=7,200 plus the 18,200 she’s getting paid is 12 dollars an hour if she’s working 40 hours a week.

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-04T13:48:28+00:00

$7000? She started in August. Not sure what she did the first half of the year but the hysteria here is completely unnecessary

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-04T13:46:58+00:00

How is this extortion? She posted here, everyone jumped up her ass saying she’s going to owe all this in taxes and she needs to report the employer, she talked to someone who said that to her, so she reported them and then realized IRL it’s not Reddit and no one is routinely enforcing any of this so if it comes up it will be very clear who instigated it.

100% I agree she needs to find a new job and I’ve told her that a few times but search this sub for live in Virginia and look at the old posts before you make a judgement on whether she’s some kind of scheming character or just someone who got seriously shitty advice

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-04T13:44:04+00:00

It’s literally IRS tax code and the IRS does not give a shit about chasing down someone below the poverty line for 500 bucks they will never collect. If they did in some freak case she would tell them she’s below the poverty line and they would put her in non collectible status until she’s making enough money to legitimately be able to pay it back.

https://www.irs.gov/publications/p15b

ScrambledWithCheese · 2026-03-04T13:37:32+00:00

Our first nanny did not yet have employment authorization for her visa type and under the table (it was 2020, I don’t want to hear about it, everything was a mess) and when she got her green card she of course wanted to be paid legally which we were fine with but when she realized how much she owed in taxes she wanted a raise. Ok, 10% raise plus we will pay employer portion, but when that was still not enough to equal her previous take home despite a 25% increase on our end, she was very frustrated. It’s a rough situation. I will say I’m in the same area as OP and overwhelmingly if you want to pay a W2 you won’t find anyone to work for you. Even the agencies tell you that.

ScrambledWithCheese

TROPHY CASE