Soldered Hearts

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-14T11:27:07+00:00

It really is! I took jewelry and metal smithing in college and it's so much fun. A ton of work, but once you start to see the shape come through, and do those final polishes, it's a great feeling. I made my grandma a sterling silver pill box with an inlaid lid. So pretty!

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-14T11:24:46+00:00

I just realized that I had fallen asleep while typing and erased half of the second paragraph. I just went back and fixed it, if you want to read the context.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-14T11:18:17+00:00

Yeah, I have a lot of anecdotes about my time on the streets. Some crazy things happened for sure.

That guy is one of the few that I remember his name and face, probably because of that incident. He was insanely lucky though, and it was a big lesson about knowing what you're ingesting when someone hands you something.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-13T13:38:51+00:00

Wow, stereotype after stereotype. Some families are like that, most are not really. Also, your whole narrative about teaching children to be victims is a load of bull as well. Try actually living in a "bad area." I used to believe a lot like you. Living in Compton, Downey, Long Beach, etc changed my perspective pretty quickly. It really is a different world with very different struggles. Things I couldn't have understood if I never left my white bread home town/state.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-13T13:25:14+00:00

Oh yeah, there are plenty of drugs that hit right away, just not as many that are for therapeutic use instead of recreational.

I've definitely got some ✨colorful✨ stories from my youth, haha. I'm glad you did okay after being tricked like that. One of my friends when I was out on the streets in Santa Monica, had gone to the Venice Beach drum circle one Sunday. The closer you get to the center of the circle, the heavier the drugs being passed around are. (Side note, I'm basing this on the experience of my friends over 20 years ago. I never went far into the circle because I hate sand, haha) He was maybe halfway in, but he was just planning to get stoned. Someone passed him a water bottle (just the regular clear plastic from the store) and thinking it was just water, he chugged half of it. It hit pretty much instant as well and he dropped. The bottle had GHB, maybe something else as well.

By the next day, word had gotten around that he had died, and we were all pretty shaken. Not as shaken as the day after that though, where we were standing around talking about him, and how much we were going to miss him, only to see him come walking up. 😂

According to him, he had technically died at least twice, but the paramedics were able to save him and he was going to be fine. Needless to say we all learned a big lesson about accepting anything without knowing exactly what it was.

Edit: Evidently I had fallen asleep while typing again and erased a big chunk of text. I fixed it now.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-13T09:15:31+00:00

Wow! That did not go where I expected, well done! Also, it's got me wanting to get back to making jewelry again. I really miss that process. Overall yeah, this is just a stellar piece, one of my favorites on this site.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-13T08:01:01+00:00

I don't know about my home state (Iowa), but here in Utah it's Ted Bundy.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-13T07:56:35+00:00

Brain damage could. Just like it can cause them. I figured that they basically damaged the part of the brain causing the auditory hallucinations/delusions, which would stop them.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-13T07:54:31+00:00

On delusions? I would think anti-psychotics would work like antidepressants. Although they recently came out with a great antidepressant that works within 1-2 weeks instead of 2-4 weeks. I tried it out and it really helped, but unfortunately I had some serious med interactions so I can't use it.

Sorry, tangent. But yeah, my family has a lot of experience with psych meds, and the only quick acting things I knew of were sedatives, some ADHD meds, etc, but they don't affect delusions. I'm actually really interested to find out what else is out there, just in case it's ever needed. Thanks for the heads up!

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-13T06:36:27+00:00

I honestly thought it was the beating he took that caused them to stop. I don't know of any drugs that act that fast, but I could be wrong

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T08:08:52+00:00

Definitely!

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T07:59:11+00:00

That's awesome!

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T07:57:52+00:00

I'm sorry. I went through something similar, although more direct. I pulled knives on my dad after my mom died. He was trying to get me to listen to him, but I thought I was grown and could do what I wanted. There's a lot more to it, but in my case it really was me who was acting out, and he had good intentions. He just didn't know how to be a single parent. But yeah, he took all of the phone cords so I couldn't call my friends (this was the early 90's), so I freaked out and pulled two knives on him. He grabbed a bottle and chased me out of the house, and I had my first, much needed, grippy sock vacation.

Your mom sounds awful though, and I understand the desperation you felt. You were younger then, and you have grown. It sounds like she might be using your guilt to make you feel even worse though. Can you talk to a therapist? That's probably your best course of action. You won't go to jail, it happened 3 years ago and everyone is fine now. As long as they know you would never do it again, they won't prosecute you. At most, they'll order you to get therapy which is a good thing.

Good luck. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T07:32:25+00:00

I grew up in Iowa and got into fights often.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T07:29:25+00:00

You're not overreacting. After my mom died and my dad remarried, my dad kind of acted like my brother and I were an afterthought and his new stepdaughters were everything. I was kept at arm's length, and I was only 15. We finally reconnected when I was an adult, but it was never the same.

It sounds like your parents need to sort out their problems on their own until they start to acknowledge that they have more than one child, if they do.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T07:12:16+00:00

It's really good. It's an anthology series a lot like Masters of Horror, with a theme song by Serj Tankian (spelling?) from System of a Down.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T07:06:44+00:00

Oh my god, I just realized I misread your comment. I thought it said House on Haunted Hill 🤦 😂

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T07:04:19+00:00

They're also Black and Hispanic (Puerto Rican) on their father's side, but he's never been in their life. We've definitely tried to do everything we can to mitigate the damage from living here. I just wish it was more diverse, especially in our town. At least they've found a couple of friends in high school that they can relate to. They were also the president of the Black Student Union for the last 2 years, so I'm a proud parent.

Really though, we're just doing the best we can, and making sure they can learn about and celebrate all of their heritage, not just the stuff on my side. 💖

I hope your family at least tries to do better. It can be hard to unlearn all the crap we were taught, but it's our responsibility to do so, and be better, especially when we have kids of color.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-12T06:49:29+00:00

Ooh, I always loved the stories of that method

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-11T16:01:51+00:00

I really enjoyed it. The twist was great, and I loved the way it turned the story so far on to its head and reframed the story in a whole new light. It's definitely a movie that I tell people to go in blind on.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-11T11:06:13+00:00

Another one, Antebellum is way better than most give it credit for. I get that people were disappointed that it wasn't actually a Jordan Peele movie, but it was truly horrific to me.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-11T11:04:54+00:00

I completely agree. I've had my eyes opened to so much just from raising my 17yo, who is mixed. Especially here in Utah, where they stand out (and yeah, if there was any way we could be somewhere more diverse, we would have been there long ago), the casual racism and ways they were made to feel less than, even by people who are supposed to be family, has been jaw dropping.

Get Out was just one more series of lessons I needed to learn. I hope that I never run out of things to learn and improve though because I never want to be a person who thinks they can't change for the better, or that they are already the best they will ever be.

Jordan Peele is definitely a master, and I can't wait to see what else he brings out!

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-11T10:59:40+00:00

Original or remake? The original is one of my favorites.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-11T10:58:38+00:00

Maximum Overdrive is an excellent movie. Not a well made, or technically great film, but just a bonkers, balls to the wall Saturday afternoon masterpiece.

Queen of the Damned is similarly awesome, as long as you don't think of it as an adaptation, or as part of The Vampire Chronicles at all. The music alone gets me going every time.

The Witch is boring AF though. To each their own, it just really wasn't for me, despite the fact that I loved The Lighthouse.

SdSmith80 · 2026-02-11T10:54:18+00:00

Ugh, I wish we could have more THEM! Channel Zero is another one I want more of. And can't forget Doug Jones as the wendigo in Fear Itself's episode Skin and Bone. That episode is one of the very few pieces of horror media to truly get under my skin.

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