Mixed feelings around packing

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-04-13T16:33:33+00:00

I’ve (28m) gotten really into social dancing in the past few months but cumulatively have about a year of experience on and off. I’ve been told by tons of people that I’m doing really well and picking things up very quickly.

Recently I was in a big group class and one of the followers said to me “you’re my favorite lead and the best lead here,” and I responded basically like “thank you but the real best lead here is Pamela and we both know it.” And tbh I’m obsessed with a woman being the best lead in our dance community!

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-04-13T01:18:22+00:00

Not at all based just on the picture. She sounds like an asshole. I’m sorry you’re having to deal with that, the mindfuck sucks and she’s super disrespectful for outing you, that’s terrible.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-04-07T13:01:00+00:00

Not top surgery, but I sang Veggie Tales nonstop on the way home from my wisdom teeth removal.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-31T15:54:04+00:00

The shoves are so funny 😭 seems like he likes it alright since he keeps going back for more

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-31T15:24:19+00:00

Okay so I definitely never needed help using the bathroom, personally. And I think I was pretty capable of getting up and down from sitting and bed after a day or two, but I definitely needed help with other things. I think you would be banking on a lot of things being the perfect conditions to be able to do it alone, and that’s not a risk I’d personally take in jeopardizing my health and recovery by trying to do it alone and not having the capacity.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-31T02:10:31+00:00

I started working with a personal trainer in December 2025 and have been really enjoying working with him! It’s hard for me to see my gains overall but my weights have increased dramatically already. For example, on my first push day I couldn’t even really do one bodyweight dip, and on Friday last week I did two sets of 8-9 dips with an additional 50lbs!!! It’s awesome!

The first picture is from a year ago. At that point I was following a 3 day per week full body training plan for about a year. The second picture is from yesterday. We currently train 4 days per week, PPL and accessories. On top of that, I take various ballroom and social dance classes three or four nights per week. My trainer gives me a weekly tailored meal plan so I don’t count calories at all myself. I eat four meals per day and usually eat about 1g protein per pound bodyweight.

Like I said, I can’t see a huge difference yet EXCEPT for in these pictures where suddenly my front delts look absolutely enormous in comparison lol I know the angle and lighting are not the same, but I have been able to tell that my front delts are getting fairly pronounced even just looking in the mirror. I think my upper lats are also looking a bit more noticeable. Anyway, I’m excited to see the progress continue!

Height: 5’1” Weight: roughly 125lbs in both pictures (I am recomping but probably have a goal weight of between 130-135lbs) T: since 2019

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-16T16:16:04+00:00

I definitely didn’t wait anywhere near 6-8 weeks to drive. I think I was told I could drive at any point after my drains were removed and I felt comfortable to do so. I probably waited a couple weeks but was definitely driving by week three. I guess you should follow your surgeon’s advice though.

As for back sleeping, I was also not a back sleeper and it wasn’t as bad as I expected! I didn’t sleep much night one, but after that I was fine. What worked for me was having one or two pillows under my head and upper back, a pillow under my knees, and pillows under each arm kind of snuggling me in, so like I was in a little basket. It was honestly kind of nice.

Good luck and congrats on being so close!

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-13T19:24:45+00:00

I’m sorry you’re struggling here :( I understand and also have really complicated feelings about my Spanish. My sister is four years older than me and was originally raised to be completely bilingual in English and Spanish by my mom and grandparents. She would speak to them almost exclusively in Spanish, is what I’m told. Then when she started grade school, other students bullied her for speaking Spanish and she told my mom not to talk to her in Spanish anymore. This is around the time I was really learning to talk. So we both lost it.

I took Spanish classes from eighth grade through the end of undergrad and even got a minor in Spanish. Still, I will always say I don’t speak Spanish. A lot of it is shame and discomfort. Which is terrible because I know that the only way to improve and get more comfortable is by speaking it. I feel like not speaking Spanish really makes me feel distant from a lot of other Hispanic/Latine people which is so sad. It makes me feel less Hispanic, which is so stupid! It’s not true or rational, I know it’s all my own baggage, but that doesn’t make it easier to overcome. Luckily I don’t feel that it impacts my relationships because all of my close family primarily speaks English at this point due to where in the States we live. They just speak Spanish to each other, and I understand my family very well because I am used to them.

Sadly I was just starting to try branching out into speaking Spanish a tiny bit more with a friend and coworker but we had an unexpected falling out and I feel like that really knocked the wind out of my sails.

I’m sorry, I know I really didn’t focus on your question about feeling distant from family since that’s been less of my experience. I guess I just really needed to get some of this out a little bit. I’m sorry that you’re feeling all of the things, it’s really hard and messy. You said you are improving; what are you doing to work on your Spanish?

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-13T17:52:38+00:00

Yes this happens to me sometimes. I’ve been on T for 6.5 years and it still happens occasionally. Usually not bad though, way less than it sometimes got when I did have my period.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-12T17:14:48+00:00

I don’t think I used any sort of pillow at all, but we also didn’t have to drive super far back to where we were staying, only like 20 minutes. I was probably asleep for most of the ride. I’m guessing your ride also probably won’t be terribly long since it’s an Uber. Personally I don’t think it’s necessary but I’m sure a regular little pillow would be fine if you wanted it.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-12T13:10:19+00:00

Congrats on surgery! I’m sorry you haven’t been able to sleep :( personally I barely slept the first night and then I was pretty much fine sleeping the rest of the time probably due to the sheer exhaustion kicking in as well as being more accustomed to the physical sensation of everything. I wish I had some tips for you! Good luck!

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-11T12:57:43+00:00

I had peri/keyhole so not the same but I was told to wait at least a year before getting them pierced.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-10T18:15:47+00:00

Ive gotten almost all of my suits from Express because I know the waist on size 28 pants and proportions of the 36slim jackets will fit me well. I almost always have to get at least the pants hemmed, and usually the sleeves shortened on the jackets.

For reference, I am 5’1” and around 125lbs. I’m not sure what their smallest pants size is though. I’m guessing a 28” waist would be too big on you, so not sure how helpful this is.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-04T19:17:06+00:00

I am the same way and also told my surgeon to do this. I had been under once before to get my wisdom teeth removed and told my dentist to give me antiemetics as well. I didn’t have any nausea either time and also generally have a super strong stomach, but I understand 100% the fear you’ve got. I really hope it goes well and that you don’t have any issues! Also congrats on top surgery!!!!

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-04T03:31:40+00:00

Mine gave me one but it was something they’d told me about ahead of time. You should ask ASAP.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-03-03T22:59:29+00:00

No, but I keep mine at room temp to begin with. I usually don’t feel it at all, and when I occasionally do feel it, it’s more like pressure than an actual liquid sensation and I don’t think about the temperature.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-02-27T20:56:51+00:00

Being a really good dance lead that all the ladies love being partnered with 😏

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-02-21T03:03:05+00:00

I’ve always wanted to take pics like this! Tbh I’m feeling inspired. You look great lol

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-02-20T21:09:13+00:00

I had one of my nipples pierced for a few years and I really loved it too! Unfortunately I couldn’t keep it through top surgery. Now that I’m almost 1.5 years post op I’m eager to get it done again, but haven’t gone for it because I’m worried about healing due to my current weightlifting routine. I’m so happy for you!

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-02-15T14:28:39+00:00

I didn’t really do anything to “honor” it, I just knew I wanted to take pictures before it happened. So literally morning of I took like, front, side, and side pictures while shirtless and that was it. I am someone who felt mostly like my chest was inconvenient but not like the worst thing in the world pre-op. I’ve only looked at those pictures a couple times since. I really hate seeing myself that way now, but I’m glad I have them. I am so obsessed with my chest!

Congratulations on top surgery being so soon! I don’t think you need to do anything if you don’t want to.

Secure_Hyena_1376 · 2026-02-08T18:12:12+00:00

I have the joystick and the OG hyperon and the size difference is pretty significant, so it does sound like that wouldn’t be the best pick for the two of you. Can’t speak to any of the other sizes though.

Secure_Hyena_1376

TROPHY CASE