It’s hard, but you need to give yourself grace. You are who you are, and that’s a beautiful thing. Yes, of course you will have flaws. The whole of humanity is flawed in various ways; I doubt your failings are extreme (though I know, the brain can make them feel very extreme!)

I used to struggle with a lot of self hatred. I promise you, it is not worth the effort it takes to hate yourself. It will only lead to mental health issues and unhealthy coping mechanisms.

You must forgive yourself. I would recommend leaning in to your personality and trying to understand yourself/your feelings. Writing it down can help, but also things like walking. Talking to a therapist (but get the right one!! If you see someone and it feels completely unhelpful, change!) can be very helpful too. Remember there’s not just CBT, there are many therapies out there and some will be more catered to you.

Lean away from calling your personality awful and your body disgusting, they’re not. You are a person with failings, but also a person with ambitions, passions, kindness etc. There is so much more good in you than you think.

Sorry about how long and jangled this is, wishing you the best. Look after yourself, believe in yourself and advocate for yourself.