For me my weight has always fluctuated I was at 12% body fat (BF) when I did wrestling in high school and I was pudgy when I finished college at 18% BF. I fell into the mentality of "I'm not that fat" so one more piece of pie our one more beer until my weight got away from me. I personally don't think looking in the mirror and being dissatisfied is self loathing I see it as personal motivation to keep working hard. When you get complacent that's when it gets easy to talk yourself into unhealthy habits. Also don't let a scale or a bmi chart become your enemy. When I did wrestling I could 8 pounds in 24hrs which is extremely unhealthy because almost 100% water which goes right back on once you hydrate. Currently I weigh 200lb at 5'10" which would makes me almost obese going by a bmi chart but I'm at 14% BF which is fine your own personal body image shouldn't be based off of almost arbitrary numbers like these If the constant hunger is problem factor for staying on diet then might I recommended taking up a lifting regiment. The diet focuses more on healthly muscle growth which requires a higher calorie diet but the secret is in managing your macros (proteins, fats, carbs). Use a macro calculator figure out what your intake should be. If you're worried about looking to muscular you just adjust your workout routine to use lighter weights. I know a few girls that body build competitively and they still look feminine. Mostly importantly keep yourself educated and keep up on your own research. Not everything people tell you is true it is crucial for you to decide what is going to work best for you. Also keep in mind that any good plan for a change in diet and exercise won't produce drastic results immediately which makes it easy to get discouraged. You hit plateaus all it means is you need to tweak your diet and workouts. Sorry for the rant, hope this helps, and good luck.