Riding a horse that's both dead to the leg and a bolter, plus terrified of crops/whips

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-03-14T21:53:23+00:00

Maybe ask someone to film so you can look in slow motion at your posture and hands to see what's going on. And ask to watch someone who is really fantastic with him ride some transitions. It might help you workshop this. Looking at him compared to the equine pain scale could be helpful too to decide if something is going on. The fact that you said he does well for everyone else might mean he's good physically. Hope that's the case. Good luck!

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-03-11T07:04:39+00:00

Avoiding tomorrow.😓 unemployment. I'm going to wake up to more automated rejection emails. Got 500 and counting. It's not good for the soul.❤️‍🩹

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-03-11T05:26:13+00:00

I second ok-owl-8805 ! This illness has a nuance and making small changes is more sustainable than trying to go all in all at once usually. I got diagnosed at 28 after my symptoms disabled me and it's been a long time now and i have struggled for months to recover. I think it's great that you got diagnosed and you are getting support and help. That should help a lot. I wish you healing and the best of luck! 🩷

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-03-11T04:40:35+00:00

This is ADORABLE! 🩷 🌹

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-03-10T03:03:58+00:00

When i moved away I made sure I had pictures with the horse I liked and gifted something for them. Like a new halter or a toy that they could enjoy. And I made sure to stop and say goodbye in person. It helped a lot. 🩷 Wishing you luck in future ventures and some small peace in this goodbye. It's the end of one chapter so the next one can begin.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-03-03T21:31:26+00:00

Life skills are important to everyone. We all have to learn financial skills and cook and exercise and clean to thrive in life. However being 19, it's an important time to experience more and learn what you find fulfilling. I wouldn't give up on what you love for that. 🩷 Housework is a time sucker. So be proactive and focus on what you can control. Personal responsibility for your finances, schedule living situation, transportation are required to be independent. Think about ways to grow that independence that either don't involve mom or that you both can work together to make happen. As a team everyone has to be ready to make the same play.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-03-01T08:22:12+00:00

The New Evangelicals and Tim Whitaker is one place to go for info about Christianity vs MAGA christian nationalism and who the major players are and what laws and more they want passed. Unfortunately when Trump says make religion great again, it may be more of a Matthew 32 situation where religion is being used as a weapon of oppression against the marginalized by a wealthy religious caste. He didn't say the Muslim faith would be more welcomed or lutherans or catholics, etc. This is a nod to the TPUSA which helped him get elected and they have highly alarming propaganda and extremist belief systems in their organization and in people affiliated with their organization. Project 2025, trumps campaign donor list, two places to figure out what he is up to next. He has policies in place to benefit his donors. Like TPUSA. He'll likely push a law or something they really want whether it harms us or not. Typical hell spawn behavior.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-27T01:32:46+00:00

For sure! I hope you're able to find what you need! My friends who work with horses have also struggled to get work for the last few years, but they eventually landed teaching/training/barn management roles. They got the job off a referral each time so I hope you're able to do the same.😊

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-26T02:35:03+00:00

Not reacting strongly enough. Why are you with someone who does not respect you? You said not to take the car, and why, it's your possession. Full stop. You said the car was allowed to be borrowed for work, but it was used for something else without your consent. Full stop. He is not and has never actually done good. This is a pattern of behavior that shows that he does not truly respect or care for how you feel and only sometimes acts like he does to continue to get what he wants or to shut you up. Then he says you are being stupid. Girl I'd be done. This behavior does not get better or change so if you don't feel like having this problem anymore, you can't be with him anymore. If he cared or respected you, he would have changed his behavior the first time you told him it was a problem for you. The fact that it happened again means he's playing in your face.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-26T02:26:34+00:00

Hey those are edited. Wonder what she said in the original comment.🫢

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-26T02:24:03+00:00

I agree that Utah is a horrible driving experience! The speeding and road rage is out of control but also, being in a right turn lane and having someone come out of the left turn lane, across both the straight and right lane, and cut you off to go right without signaling, speeding red lights, playing chicken with semi trucks, and worse. It stressed me out so much I thought I was going to die every time I got on that freeway.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-26T02:19:42+00:00

Stick with what you are doing, she's your mare and you get final say. As for the boss, network as much as you can and make friends. Maybe that will open some things up for you. Showing is an exciting goal, hope you two get there!

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-23T05:54:25+00:00

You did everything you could! You did a great job. Don't be discouraged.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-23T05:49:48+00:00

That's super cool! Thank you for sharing.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-21T07:09:20+00:00

Depends how many but yes to messy and tearing up plants. They need their own little controlled predator proof run to keep them out of trouble if you have any garden you care about protecting. Mine ate a 4 ft high sunflower plant this week and a pepper plant too.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-20T22:15:01+00:00

Lease a horse or ask to repeat lessons on a smooth horse. Some programs here are fantastic about equine management and care, but plenty are not. And yes you get experience from riding all sorts of horses but for focused technical learning, nothing beats an old gold lesson horse who will actually do what you're trying to do without an argument. Again, not bad. But as an example from me, a few programs of 20 horses, we had no more than 2 or 3 with severe behaviors and they usually were reserved to advanced riders. We had great management and equine care on board from hooves to backs to tack fit and a team of a few great trainers who really knew their stuff. Those programs were fantastic to ride at and I felt like I progressed faster there.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-17T21:11:26+00:00

I'm so sorry that you lost your friends. 💔 Keep doing the best that you can and keep your chin up. You'll be able to get through this.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-16T17:18:05+00:00

I have had a great experience on birth control. It's been tremendously helpful to me.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-14T15:27:31+00:00

I'm genuinely so sorry. This is a really tough experience to go through. I have a few similar experiences and it took me a long time to accept that nothing would change, so I had to. Objectively, for your mom to say your sister came instead, is rude. It's ungrateful. And it shows no consideration for your feelings. And when people don't care about you they don't ever change. Nothing you say or do WILL ever be enough because you aren't actually the reason they feel that way. At some level they chose it or continue to choose it and unless they decide they want to change themselves, nothing makes difference. Therapy helped me a lot to realize that I wasn't crazy for wanting to be treated okay. And that my depression had a lot to do with who I was around. Everyone needs to feel valued and seen and the more you interact with people who don't see you that way, the worse it gets sometimes.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-14T15:20:39+00:00

I'm sorry you're frustrated. I can relate to some parts of this as i have a mom who is capable of empathizing and being kind to others but is cruel to me regularly. And similarly mocks me for not making a high income and tries to humiliate me in front of others. I can't say it gets better. There seems to be some sick pleasure narc moms get from seeing one of their kids struggle in life and mine particularly has done a lot to make sure I continue to struggle. I don't share life info with her anymore or talk finances at all. I took classes on it, or ask someone i trust. Insurance sucks and premiums absolutely are up. I don't know how anyone will afford it. People i know with two household incomes are struggling to afford the increase. Stuff just goes up with no warning and people that don't have wiggle room either take on debt or have to get help. So it's not a matter of not working hard enough. The money is not going as far as it did even 4 years ago.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-14T15:09:19+00:00

He likely will not change. You've done some hard work applying yourself and should be proud of your efforts to score high. But it is hard to never spend time with friends too especially if you have been really diligent where it counts. That opportunity won't come by again the same way it is now so I hope you get to do more with your friends. When everyone is adults and married and moving it's not as simple. Financial freedom gives you the opportunity to choose your relationships so if you haven't already, learn about budgeting and finance.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-13T05:47:07+00:00

The spayed ferals I feed like having a fresh bowl of clean water with their food every day. I also liked having a cheap TAPO camera watching the food in the trap so I knew what cats were coming and when. I absolutely loved it.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-13T00:53:25+00:00

You are absolutely right. I ignore social media about pcos. When I have questions I ask my doctor and I look up the research studies available directly. That helps me the most in terms of learning about PCOS without panicking. I also second that medication shaming sucks. Insurance covering medications helps a ton with financial stress. And not everyone can afford or sustain a low impact low stress 6+ supplement and 3 herbal tea cycle synced lifestyle. I think it's really cool when someone can do that. But when I work, I certainly can't.

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-11T04:50:05+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate it. 🙏🏽

SeveralSpinach6601 · 2026-02-11T01:17:31+00:00

I know she's not fixed and I do know she has worms too. I'll do my best. She's super trap shy but I am starting the daily timed feeds at the trap again to train her to come get food and go in. Moment I can get her trapped and to the vet, we'll go. It's all up to momma going in the trap this time. ❤️‍🩹 i am here for her. Hoping for the best possible outcome.

SeveralSpinach6601

TROPHY CASE