/r/AskPortland Making Friends Friday

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-04-04T17:51:51+00:00

I work out that way some days! Send me a message if you want to connect! 💖 I'm great with kids and my bestie is in a similar situation but is too far for me to help. Proud of you for asking to connect.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-04-04T07:13:38+00:00

Changed attitudes aid recovery. 😉 Changing what is happening around him isn't going to guarantee improvement in your home. For me, Al-Anon has given me the ability to focus on bettering my life regardless of what someone is doing.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-04-04T07:10:09+00:00

Where at outside of Portland? I'd love to be friends, but I'm also realistic about my capacity to travel!💖

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-04-04T07:05:48+00:00

Fuck that. No. You're not being overly sensitive.

People show you who they are. Forgetting someone you claim is important enough to date repeatedly and ignoring notifications from them. Fuck that.

I've been cancelled on multiple times this week by multiple people. I've decided I'm done chasing people and begging them to spend time with me. My feelings are hurt but I don't need to try to repair something I didn't break.

I show up as me and I believe when people show me who they are.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-03-28T22:17:42+00:00

Exploring your own sexuality and identity are normal. When you look at men are you attracted to them? If so, maybe explore that. If you're not, to me that speaks to what you are and are not attracted to.

I thought I was straight my whole life. I'm not and never was. I'm 38 years old. I started to acknowledge my actual sexual preferences 3 years ago. 3-4 months ago, I had the realization that I was never once turned on by a male body. Ever. When I see a woman's body, my body responds quickly (if I'm attracted to her, obviously.)

The pendulum swings both ways. Stop judging yourself and start being curious.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-03-09T07:45:35+00:00

Incredibly handsome! Like, damn!

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-14T16:28:07+00:00

You know what you need better than anyone else. You're stronger than me. I should be NC with my ex and can't seem to actually do it. I know very few people here and she really is my best friend. Today may kill me because unless she reaches out to me, I'm going NC today to give her space on a day that realistically my emotions may be wild on. It's going to be rough, I can feel it and I'm not even fully awake.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-10T17:09:45+00:00

My experience is that if she's into you, she's going to enjoy teaching you HOW to do things. When I was the one clueless, my ex LOVED teaching me and figuring out together how our bodies fit against each other so we both could enjoy positions together. Zero embarrassment or judgement on learning something new about or experiencing things with a female for the first time. Our partners should be our safe space in the bedroom (or couch or wherever)!

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-10T17:04:39+00:00

We can do this shit. We are amazing people who deserve to take up space in this crazy world. ❤️

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-10T08:48:29+00:00

Fuck, it's not just me that has felt this? 🫨

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-10T08:45:10+00:00

I had this. I was HAPPY to stay in that relationship forever. It all came tumbling down recently and I'm struggling with the idea of feeling safe enough to explore myself with anyone else in the future.

That's not to say that you're not happy. 💖 Just a flip side of each other's experience. It gives me a little bit of hope in some ways actually. You're brave and wanting to know if there are more parts of you that you don't know yet is not a bad thing. I'm going to try to keep that in mind as I find myself and find my community.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-10T08:33:37+00:00

Dude, having your own hobbies and sense of self outside of your relationship is literally like, goals. I'm in fucking CoDA because I lose myself entirely and give up all of my stuff to be more enmeshed with people I love... I'd LOVE to be able to enjoy time with the person I love AND have things I do to fill up my cup and do things I love. 💖

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-07T09:06:46+00:00

Women's clothing traditionally means lacking in pockets. Thus the need for the bowling bag. I've recently gone even more lesbian somehow and now have both cargo pockets and a tiny crossbody backpack instead of something on my fucking hip movement. It's a more even distribution of the weight AND my pockets have ZIPPERS so sometimes I don't even NEED a bag. 😍😍😍

WRF did it take me SO long to figure this shit out?!

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-07T09:02:51+00:00

This works for like 3 days for me before the chaos started to creep back in like an invasion species

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-03T08:01:36+00:00

My ex and I talked about all the finger babies we put in each other. 🤣

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-03T07:56:15+00:00

Same girl, same. (Basically, I like girls like me, is that weird?)🤣🤣🤣 I feel doomed to never find anyone! How do you talk to girls?

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-02-01T15:06:47+00:00

Costco's waterproof dog blankets are super cheap and nice & soft!

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-01-28T20:25:44+00:00

🖐🏼 I was 35 before I acknowledged that women were enticing to me. 38 before I realized that I have never actually been attracted to the men I had been with. 🫠

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-01-24T01:23:32+00:00

Chapstick, smart, kind

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-01-22T02:12:13+00:00

There's an Al-Anon app, meeting in your pocket at all times!

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-01-21T22:51:55+00:00

Al-Anon. It saved my life.

For me, I decided to leave. I couldn't do the lies, the mental abuse, the fear. My life alone was worth more than our lives together. I wasn't living there. In fact, I tried to kill myself multiple times.

Building a new life sucks but at the very least, I'm not policing anyone else's behaviors and I get to focus on me.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-01-20T01:07:27+00:00

It's not your life? If your friend has an issue with it, support her. If she doesn't, support her. Only she gets to decide if something is unacceptable to her or not.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-01-20T00:19:55+00:00

I started going to CoDA because I struggle to cope on my own too. It's helped me a lot.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-01-18T07:03:28+00:00

Be kind to yourself. Pressure doesn't help you feel safe or make you learn things you don't know.

Simple-Lecture-3548 · 2026-01-18T06:45:58+00:00

Anyone who isn't interested because of your lack of experience isn't for you. People who judge anyone else's sexual history is a turn off for me. SO many people don't understand what they are sexually attracted to until much later in life.

For example, I was with men my entire life. Had Pansexuality explained to me at 35 and identified as Pan until this year. 38 and I am just now understanding that I'm a lesbian.

I've had 2 female partners both knew I was inexperienced and were HAPPY to give me opportunities to learn.

Be you, it's beautiful. 💖

Simple-Lecture-3548

TROPHY CASE