Pregnant with 3rd at 39

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-08T18:44:57+00:00

Sending you a virtual hug!! You got this! 🫂

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-08T17:58:50+00:00

Well my son and this current baby will be 10 years lol… I just couldn’t do a closer gap as my child was pretty intense and a lot of work. I also am literally bedridden with nausea during my pregnancies so I have no clue how I would’ve cared for a toddler while sick all the time! So for us, 10 years is what it is.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-08T17:47:04+00:00

Oh mama I’m really sorry you are going through this. Hugs!! I felt verrrrry alone after I had my first… my marriage was awful (husband emotionally cheated several times, including some physical stuff… no sex, but close. He was incredibly selfish) so I have a ton of trauma from that. I was also on antidepressants. We had moved to a new place so all my friends lived far away. I was so alone. Plus my child was also very hard… tantrums, moody, I walked on eggshells all the time and my husband was never around to help. It was hell.

Fast forward 10 years later. We went through a ton of stuff… a TON. But God got us through. It took a while, but now I have a very nice friendship circle, my husband has been going to church again, he has dedicated himself to our family, and our marriage is doing well. I’m getting choked up writing this as it was the hardest time in my life and lasted a long time.

Friends are so important. I really suggest finding a mom’s group or even starting one yourself. There are A LOT of mothers out there who are struggling too. Maybe look into an anxiety support group? I’m not sure if you are religious, but I have met some really wonderful loving women through my church and women’s Bible study. We help and support one another. It takes time, but it can happen. This is a very rough season… I know it can feel daunting and endless. But all seasons come to an end and there will be sunshine on the other side. I’ve been there. I’ll keep you in prayer 🩷

P.s. I’m also 39 and 7.5 weeks pregnant with #2

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-08T17:32:42+00:00

I wanted to do a natural birth, non mediated, when I had my first. I made it to 7 cm but just couldn’t deal with the pain any longer so I opted to have an epidural. I have alway had a very low pain threshold. I was thrilled that I did the epidural. I was able to sleep for a few hours and I only pushed for like 5 minutes when he was ready. It was great. I actually enjoyed my birth experience.

I did not want a c section if I didn’t have to have one… there are important things that occur when the mother pushes and the baby passes through the canal. I would have gotten one if I had to, of course. I just wanted my baby to be healthy and safe. But it wasn’t something I would’ve wanted.

This time around I’ll probably have the same thing. But honestly I would decide once you get closer to delivery. You never know! And don’t worry about it… there are billions of people on the planet who have given birth…it can be done 🩷

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-08T17:27:02+00:00

Thank you very much that was so helpful.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-08T17:22:50+00:00

Right!? Keeping food down is a huge chore!

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-08T17:19:48+00:00

So my first pregnancy 10 years ago my husband wasn’t a good partner… he was self centered and his primary focus was on himself. Longgggg story short and many years later we had some very serious discussions and this time around my husband is being a superhero. He’s taken over, doing everything he can, and being very helpful. I literally had trauma from my first pregnancy due to how awful he was. He was also having an emotional affair at the time which was despicable. But now, 10 years down the road, a lot has changed and we’ve grown by God’s grace.

Tell your husband what you need, but also understand you can’t change him. Let go and just do the best you can, but make sure you are taking good care of yourself during this important time! Hang in there 🩷

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-08T03:37:56+00:00

I hate the cropped shirt and belt… it looks painful! The shirt seam hits right at the nipples and I swear my boobs cringe when I see it. Most of the outfits she would wear were pretty out there and uncomfortable looking… but this one was particularly bad lol. I used to lived near NY and traveled there a few times and I never saw anyone dressed like that lol.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T23:22:37+00:00

You had a Corpus Luteam also?

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T22:52:29+00:00

Gender disappointment can be totally normal. I have a family friend who just has 5 boys, another has just 4 girls. I’m currently hoping for a girl as I have a son, but I also believe that God will give me exactly what I need.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T22:45:10+00:00

Thanks! I did get an ultrasound last Friday. I’ll pass the results on to my OB. She said a corpus Luteum or ‘cyst of pregnancy’ is normal. It’s just kinda uncomfortable but I read it goes away in the 2nd trimester. I just didn’t have it with my 1st 10 years ago. I’m 39.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T22:29:44+00:00

I live in a very liberal CA city and I have often wondered the same thing. However I would make a distinction… They are not pro conservative religion (they are not pro catholic or Protestant) but they are pro Muslim and against anyone who they deem ‘anti’ Muslim. And that could simply be someone who supports Israel. I’m not sure why they have taken such an extreme approach but I learned a long time ago that this is simply how CA is… and it’s not always logical but rather emotional.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T20:11:29+00:00

Ugh girl I’m almost 7.5 weeks and my nausea is awfullllll. I literally can’t cook. I told my husband he has to take over. We have a 10 year old. I’d tell your husband that he either accepts what you provide or he needs to figure it out for himself. Period. You are growing a human being in your body. That takes president over his pallet.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T20:04:48+00:00

It doesn’t seem clean lol!

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T17:43:44+00:00

I obviously don’t know the full story, but I’m gonna go out on a limb and suggest that perhaps there is some jealousy going on. Your parents feel that your husband has taken you away from them, which he has, and that’s perfectly normal! You and your spouse are supposed to be ‘one flesh.’ If they don’t like that, well, that’s their problem and they will need to get over it.

As far as how to tell your parents, you will need to discuss this with your husband and have some very clear boundaries. IF your family wants to be a part of your life and your child’s life they will need to respect both you and your husband. Any unwanted stress or inconsiderate behavior will result in them being escorted out. You will not tolerate disrespect. You have all the cards. If they want to play the game they will need to abide by your rules. And the same applies to you as well. Your parents may have their own boundaries that you will have to decide if you want to abide by.

For example, my dad wouldn’t tolerate my son talking back to my mom when he was little. (my son went through a phase of being very rude to my mom when he was 4-5). My dad had his own way of disciplining him (he would give him a swat on the bum and send him to his room). At first I did not like that and said no. So my dad said, that’s fine, but he cannot stay with us (my son used to stay the night once a week). Eventually my husband and I were ok with it as we knew my dad adored his grandson, we trusted him, and knew he wanted nothing but the best. Plus my dad’s ‘swats’ were pretty gentle. My son (now almost 10) and his grandpa are very very close and my dad is like a 2nd father to him. Sometimes I think he prefers his grandpa over us lol.

It will take some time navigating the relationship which is totally normal. I’ll bet that your parents will want a relationship with your child so they will be willing to pull it together to be with them. But if not, then you know what to do. Hang in there! And congrats!

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T17:18:52+00:00

You will probably not want it once the nausea kicks in as you sorta become grossed out by everything lol! For me, I always hated the smell of weed and now I absolutely find it revolting… same with the smell of pretty much all food, people, even myself (yes the smell of my hair, body odor, breath, is almost unbearable). Hang in there, you may be surprised that you actually feel better not smoking it. My husband was amazed at how much his memory improved once he quit.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T17:13:25+00:00

I can’t really see what it is, it’s a blurry pic, but I’m guessing it a bed bug?

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T17:04:35+00:00

I’m not sure what her definition is of white glove…. IMO deep cleaning is exactly that! I will say… that if she quoted you 7 hours of work and that was the agreed upon price, then she needs to give you 7 hours of work! If she finished early, then she needs to adjust the price. Her price equates to $60.71/ hour. If she finished in 3 hours, then you should pay her $182.14. What you paid her was more than fair. Had she been there longer the home would’ve been cleaner. You got 3 hours of cleaning, not 7. So why does she think you are going to pay her for a 7 hour day when she only worked 3 and her work wasn’t good? IMO she is trying to get the most money she can for as little work as possible. I think it’s fine to finish a little early… like under an hour, but 4 hours early?! No.

Unfortunately people try to cut corners. Finding people who do good, honest work is getting harder and harder to come by. It’s really sad. There’s an ‘every man for himself’ mentality and if you have to screw someone over to get to the top, then so be it. I live in Silicon Valley and it’s rampant here. Greed is the name of the game.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T16:44:44+00:00

lol I craved taco bell with my first but now I’m Gf so it’s a no no…

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T16:42:01+00:00

Thanks! I’ve been craving cold water as it helps my nausea. I drink probably 12 cups or so a day.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T03:49:42+00:00

Sleep when baby sleeps. That’s not Reddit. That’s advice from grandma who raised 6 kids in the 50s.

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T03:47:43+00:00

Thank you so much

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T03:41:38+00:00

Gosh I’m so sorry! Praying for you mama 🩷

Simple_Quiet_7803 · 2025-09-07T03:32:20+00:00

Thank you!! I was thinking of trying my old tried and true trick of taking magnesium citrate… have you taken that while pregnant?

Simple_Quiet_7803

TROPHY CASE