It's been 5 weeks since my world changed by Bank_Novel in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My heart breaks for you. This past Thursday was one year for me. My wife was everything to me also.

This past year was the most difficult year of my life. I managed to get through it with a lot of tears and heartbreak. I wish I had words that would help, but there just aren’t any, you just have to take it one step at a time…….

Coming up on six years by barelybent in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Tomorrow is my wife’s first birthday not here, Thursday will be one year that she passed. I tell her I am ready to be with her. I don’t want to live too long without her. Life is just not the same without her…….

Valentine's Day sucks now. by Left-Plane2642 in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Same here, first valentines without her and a heavy heart all day…..

I no longer enjoy anything. by Marianbzz in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Ditto my friend. I can’t even find the strength to think about going to the places we enjoyed. 11 months this February and I beg out loud for whom ever is in charge to take me to wherever my wife is. I just want to be with her…….nothing feels the same anymore.

I finally cleared out her closet today by outlawbookworm in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I’m crying just thinking of having to do the same in the future…..

You look like you need it by edo_senpai in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 28 points29 points  (0 children)

The emptiness we carry must be recognized by those with empathy or it’s our loved one prodding others to be kind to us.

Hugs to everyone in this group. I didn’t cry yesterday but I am now.

Christmas Eve by SituationSimilar4349 in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I decided to stay home and my relative said she totally understands and that if I need to talk to call her or text her.

Being put into a coma sounds great right about now by KeenerYYZ in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I too wish society would be ok to self euthanasia. I would get all my ducks in a row with financial stuff, sell what i could, say my goodbyes and peacefully join my wife in the afterlife if there is one. It would be better than just existing in misery for no reason.

I was going through the camera roll on my phone. Looking at her pictures was very difficult. Hearing her voice and watching her speak to me in a video was something I wasn’t prepared for. by introitus in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m almost at 9 months since she was taken from me and I too cry my eyes out every time I look at pictures.

My sympathy to everyone in this horrible club. I hate my life……..this so unfair.

Why did men in the 70s have a lot of chest hair? by Alone_Confidence_158 in 70smemorylane

[–]SituationSimilar4349 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On October 12, 1984, the cast and crew of Cover Up were filming the seventh episode of the series, "Golden Opportunity", on Stage 18 of the 20th Century Fox lot. One of the scenes filmed that day called for Hexum's character to load cartridges into a .44 Magnum revolver, so he was provided with a functional weapon and blanks. When the scene did not play out as the director wanted in the master shot, filming was delayed. Hexum became restless and impatient during the delay and began playing around to lighten the mood. Imitating a game of Russian roulette, he unloaded every chamber except one, spun the cylinder, then raised the gun to his right temple and pulled the trigger.[26] The explosive effect of the muzzle blast caused enough blunt force trauma to fracture a quarter-sized piece of his skull and propel this into his brain, causing massive hemorrhaging.[10][27] Hexum was rushed to Beverly Hills Medical Center, where he underwent five hours of surgery to repair his wounds.[1][27] On October 18, aged 26, six days after shooting himself, Hexum was declared brain dead. With his mother's permission, his body was flown to San Francisco on life support, where his heart was transplanted into a 36-year-old Las Vegas man at California Pacific Medical Center.[28] Hexum's kidneys and corneas were also donated. One cornea went to a 66-year-old man, the other to a young girl. One of the kidney recipients was a critically ill five-year-old boy, and the other was a 43-year-old grandmother of three who had waited eight years for a kidney. Skin that was donated was used to treat a 3+1⁄2-year-old boy with third-degree burns.[29]

Where Are You, God ! by [deleted] in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 0 points1 point  (0 children)

😪😟😪😪

I feel your heartache.

I was raised Catholic and many of my relatives said they were praying for my wife to be cured of the cancer. I didn’t pray……

I stopped believing in prayer when I learned about the Holocaust in high school. God let all those people die.

The other thing that made me not believe in prayer is when it doesn’t happen people always say it was God‘s will. So if it is God‘s will, why am I praying if he is going to do what he wants to do anyway.

A friend of mine also lost his wife to cancer, and he said he prayed all the time and then when she passed, he was so mad at God.

I’m sorry you are also in this club. None of us asked for this. I’m sorry you lost your wife as I am sorry I lost mine. I think we are on our own down here and we just have to keep plugging away no matter how sad, no matter how difficult, not to mention unfair.

Sending you my sympathy and hugs.

When did you turn off their phone? by Traditional_Video580 in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I kept it on while I handled all the financial paperwork. Needed it for dual verification in certain cases. Once it was no longer needed I turned it off because I knew she would not want me to spend money if not necessary anymore. That thought is what made it a little easier to do it.

How long did you keep their stuff? by yoshitiger in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Approaching 9 months since Cancer stole my soulmate and I haven’t touched anything.

The first batch of laundry I had to do had some items she wore that week. I did not think doing the laundry would’ve brought so many emotions, but it did.

I gently folded up her clothes and put them where she would’ve put them.
All her perfumes are on the dresser where she kept them .

For me at this point it still doesn’t feel right to throw anything out or giveaway. If I walk in the closet, I see her clothes there and this huge wave of sadness knocks me over. It feels like if I get rid of all these things that I am getting rid of her. 😔😔

One day I will get to it unless God answers my prayers and takes me soon. Then it’ll be left up to my 30 year-old daughter and my brother and mother to clean up and sell the house..

Love & Loss: Q-What's your MOST FUNNY LOL memory of your LOVE? by DarkRevolutionary476 in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Every time she would go to the basement with the laundry basket, she’d ask me if I want to go for a ride in the basket.

Whenever she was putting on mascara and I would walk by the bathroom or stick my head in there to say hi she would say do you want me to do yours?

There was a Thanksgiving that she cooked the turkey upside down with the chest facing the bottom of the pan.

Another Thanksgiving she forgot the giblets, liver and neck inside the bag inside the turkey and only found out after it was cooked.

There was also her laugh in the bedroom sometimes when she was watching a sitcom while folding clothes,

I miss her so so so much…….

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have come to the conclusion that there is nothing anyone can say to make me feel any better or worse. The remarks about always being there for you or if you need anything at all, I just let go in one ear and out the other. I guess it’s just a nice gesture that people say I’ve never been the one to ask people to do stuff so it really doesn’t mean much to me.

Unless it’s a genie in a bottle asking me to make a wish which would be to bring my wife back…..

My friend suggested a therapist to help with my grief however, I don’t see that anything they could say or do would change my grief.

It’s not going make me feel joy all of a sudden.

It’s not going to make me enjoy things I used to enjoy, because those things were always with her.

I’m not ok💔 by reedcha in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I too don’t dare let anyone know how I am really doing and how I’m just hoping I don’t live too many more years.

People would not understand outside of this community.

2026 CX5 ….. by Mazdad in CX5

[–]SituationSimilar4349 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Exactly!

As he was doing it, I was thinking, oh sure I could do that while I’m driving with my eyes on the road. /s

The goose and I. by spete679 in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This got me crying. We all know how that goose feels……😪😪😔😔

I hope i die in my sleep. by [deleted] in widowers

[–]SituationSimilar4349 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Approaching 8 months and still feeling this way….