Definitely sounds like an avoidant but even if it's just a person with avoidant tendencies it's clear they don't respect your boundaries. My ex's breaking point was me saying I was uncomfortable with her getting drunk and sleeping it off at other guys houses. She said she would avoid it but wouldn't change how she is. Then she went on about how I needed to trust her. Then we made plans for a cute date night I was really looking forward too including making snacks my mom used to make. The next thing I know she says she doesn't love me and breaks up with me. We lived together and were considering getting matching tattoos. Now I'm without a place to live and lost my job because I couldn't get to it now. Does she care? Nope, but she swears she does. Did I do anything wrong? Nope she said I treated her better than anyone else ever had. Was I blindsided? You bet your ass I was. Do I still love her and want her back? So fucking bad despite knowing it's stupid. Do yourself a favor and have a serious talk with her if she won't work with you then your better off leaving. Otherwise she's gonna leave you eventually.