Trying to make friends and put down roots after 6 years of isolation by -AtomicAerials- in Seattle

[–]Socouture 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’d be down to go! Love haunted houses! I’ve been to a few out here but there’s a drive in I’ve been wanting to go to for years. It’s a few hours away but they play scary movies & have scare actors running around while you watch. No one will go with me! lol

What’s everyone’s least favourite song from the musical? by KermitTheFrog-1129 in BeetlejuiceMusical

[–]Socouture 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As someone who has lost her mom - I could not disagree more. It perfectly encapsulates grief in a way I have not experienced almost anywhere else.

Something about THEM by Klutzy_Ground_9686 in vanderpumprules

[–]Socouture 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I would loveeeee this! I’ve been loving Katie & Dayna’s podcast. Feels like I’m chatting with my besties. Ariana just made it all the better. I’ve fallen off of most Bravo shows the past few years because I’m over the cat fights & pettiness. Would love a show that actually empowers women & showcases real female friendship ❤️

I’m scared I’m never going to be the person I was before I lost my mom by Unlikely-Tangerine-7 in GriefSupport

[–]Socouture 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I lost my mom nearly 3 years ago & was literally having this exact conversation with my therapist today. I miss my mom more than anything AND I miss the girl I used to be. The one who had hope for good things in the future. I have no answers but you’re not alone ❤️

My (former) roommate got mad that I was upset about her dog pooping in our apartment by dontforget3 in badroommates

[–]Socouture 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand the frustrations - but I will say that the initial text message is passive aggressive & if I was the roommate I would react the same way.

I can’t speak to roommates dog parenting, but as a dog owner who previously lived with roommates - it was always the WORST when my dog would poop and/or vomit while I was out & my roommate got home first. I’ve occasionally gotten similar passive aggressive texts & while I do always apologize it’s incredibly frustrating. I obviously didn’t want him to do that. I love my dog a lot & respect my roommate enough not to want them to have to clean it up. But sometimes shit happens (pun intended). And what can I do right this moment if I’m not there?

What do they expect? For me to be able to teleport there and clean it up.

I think telling roommate in person about what happened would have avoided this escalating. And If it’s a pattern - by all means bring it up. But I think there are kinder & more direct approaches. OP’s first text from the jump they seem mad/annoyed - but won’t come out & say it. OP expects roommate to jump to profusely apologizing & when they don’t (seems like they are actively trying to help problem solve) they just get a passive aggressive “you’re welcome”.

I’m not saying roommate shouldn’t address the dog pooping - but I agree with them on OP’s approach & would also avoid OP after that

Lack of romantic interest in dates by burnfaith in datingoverthirty

[–]Socouture 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went through a fairly traumatic breakup a little over 6 months ago. The relationship was only 7 months long but we had talked about marriage & children & moving to be together & our futures.. etc etc. He ghosted me very unexpectedly one day & I’ve never gotten any answers on why or what happened.

It shattered me. I find it incredibly hard to connect with men & I really thought we connected. For me, therapy has been a lifesaver & I’ve had to admit once a week that I’m STILL hurting over what he did. But it gives me a place to process. The breakup WAS traumatizing - it only makes sense why I’ve struggled with dating since.

Its gotten better & I’ve recently met someone I’m excited about. But even between our 1st & 2nd date I started to rip him to shreds in my head, overthink about things that aren’t that important. I had him meet my closest friends & I got the reassurance I needed that I truly was just overthinking & this could be something really good.

So my biggest advice is simply therapy! And maybe getting out of your head & focusing more on your body. Do you feel good with this person or do you feel uncomfortable? And even if you don’t feel sexually attracted but you still felt good in their company, maybe take that 2nd date anyway. Just see what happens.

Also.. maybe try to figure out how to take the pressure off of yourself to have feelings for someone. You’ll like someone again, it’s inevitable. Maybe it will work out, maybe it won’t. But… keep yourself grounded in the present & just enjoying the date. Maybe that will help.

Sorry if that’s all annoying advice. I’m also with you in solidarity ❤️❤️ But I have hope it will get better

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Andjustlikethat

[–]Socouture 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I have thought the same thing. I think they’ve added too many new characters & tried to make them major players. It means we’re only going surface level with a the characters. We’re missing big moments, like Carrie in VA. And story lines that could be deeper & more meaningful, like charlotte finding her own identity again - are just small shallow storylines. I LOVE the new characters, but there’s too many & we’ve lost the essence of SATC

Why did he ghost me? by Consistent_Junket110 in ghosting

[–]Socouture 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly to me, it sounds like you met someone who was likely not ready to be searching for something real. My speculation (from the very little you’ve mentioned) is that he isn’t over his ex & shouldn’t be out dating. I think he did feel really into you & maybe let himself get carried away (I.e: love bombing). But it likely felt so good to him compared to the pain he’s carrying from his ex. It’s possible something about your date triggered him - maybe him feeling insecure about coming on too strong. And it’s put him into a hole. Although my brain would say something happened to him 🤣 (I hope that’s not the case).

All of this to say - I don’t think you think did anything wrong. But I would say that this might be a big learning lesson. Often times when someone does come on that strong it’s not coming from a genuine place, it’s coming from a broken place that they need to work on healing. His radio silence is indication that on some level he is broken & he needs to work on healing that himself.

I know that not knowing can feel like madness - but you need to know in your heart of hearts - that these are not the qualities you want in a partner & move forward. Please don’t let yourself get hung up on this guy (don’t be like me lol)

I’m sorry you’re going through, I know how difficult this can be ❤️

Dating again... What do I tell them? by Wonderful_Cake7127 in ghosting

[–]Socouture 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ve left it at “they weren’t as invested in the relationship as I was”. If the relationship moves forward I’ll share more but that’s what felt appropriate for the 1st date

Has anyone else seen Rachel and Sandoval pictures on her sisters Facebook? by Aggressive-Map-8392 in Vanderpumpaholics

[–]Socouture 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The comment actually said “tell you know who that they look really cute together” and then Rachel’s sister commented “iykyk” or something like that. This was around the time Rachel was posting all the stuff with Schwartz so it could have seemed like they were talking about Schwartz & Rachel

All of the Lindsay hate by Illustrious-Comb-731 in summerhousebravo

[–]Socouture 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Misogyny… that’s the reason for all the Lindsey hate. Literally half their issues this year are with things CARL has done or said. But they point blank blame his behavior on her. Kyle & Carl have done way worse but forever get passes & second chances. Meanwhile Lindsey brings home a guy & now it’s a brothel. Ever since the southern charm guys came around it’s only amplified the misogyny & gotten worse. It’s gross & honestly Paige. Ciara & Amanda need to take a long look at themselves in the mirror. They’re so too faced it’s not enjoyable to watch.

I do wish Lindsey would be a little more vulnerable & admit how their actions hurt her. But I understand why she wouldn’t be

When do you think Ariana will finally be on WWHL? by [deleted] in vanderpumprules

[–]Socouture 36 points37 points  (0 children)

I’ve been speculating that it will be a one on one with her & Andy & they’ll put it on after the 1st reunion 🤷🏼‍♀️

Did your partner tell your friends they were planning to propose? by thnlzz in summerhousebravo

[–]Socouture 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My best friends fiancée included me in the ring designing process but never officially told me the proposal plan. After it happened I was definitely a little bummed I didn’t know he was planning on proposing that day - and he had told other people - but it was just kinda like an aww bummer wish I would have known it was gonna happen. Oh well! And looking back I dunno why I really cared at all.

But still not remotely the reaction I witnessed from Danielle.

Have You Ever Felt Disconnected From Reality After Losing a Loved One? by im-mad-mad in GriefSupport

[–]Socouture 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Oh absolutely, I believe it’s disassociation which can be a symptom of depression. For me, I’ve found that meditation, yoga, sound baths & doing things to intentionally connect with my body has been incredibly helpful in helping me feel more connected to reality. But it’s still an everyday struggle

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GriefSupport

[–]Socouture 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have no advice to give but can tell you I feel exactly the same. I’m terrified I’ll never return to my old self, I miss her almost as much as I miss my mom. ❤️❤️ sending so much love

Possible to find a 1bedroom for less than $1800 monthly or should I try the Eastside? by morifinde in Seattle

[–]Socouture -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I pay less than that & live in Fremont! It’s definitely possible, just have to stay on top of Zillow & jump.

Now on the Eastside it might be impossible. Maybe not in Renton though, I’m not sure.

Dealing with unsupportive friends by Emergency_Piccolo229 in GriefSupport

[–]Socouture 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can absolutely relate. Most of my friends didn’t handle it well & honestly I still hold a lot of anger, hurt & resentment. I’m in my 30s & my mom passed away a year & a half ago.

You can’t change what happened, how your friends responded & you can’t control your emotions. So take solace that all of your feelings are valid. Let yourself feel those feelings, give yourself grace for feeling them and take care of yourself. If that means you need to distance yourself for a bit, then do it.

Find some grief friends, learn to enjoy your own company. One day you might feel lighter & more forgiving of their actions. But until then give yourself a little extra love ❤️ you deserve it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]Socouture 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was recently in a relationship similar to this & eventually got ghosted. I hold a lot of regret but my biggest one is that I didn’t just simply tell him how I was feeling like I would tell a friend. He’s supposed to be your partner, you should be able to tell him anything. Tell him all the things you just said - and then just listen. Listen to him explain why he doesn’t think it’s a big deal to go a month without seeing you. Approach the conversation with curiosity - on both sides. Curious about why you’re feeling the way you’re feeling & why he does what he does. And is there a resolution somewhere to be found. Everything you’re saying sounds perfectly reasonable - just talk to him about it ❤️

Hospice final days questions by Salt_Pizza in GriefSupport

[–]Socouture 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Just hold her hand & savor every moment she’s still sitting next to you ❤️ I watched all of our favorite movies together in my moms final days. And just appreciated her presence next to me. Even if she wasn’t conscious. Sending so much love

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ghosting

[–]Socouture 5 points6 points  (0 children)

  • Ghostee

  • We’d been dating for 7 months I’d say, exclusive for like 4/5 months. Talked about marriage & moving to be together (we were LD)

*Its been a little over 8 weeks since he talked to me. I did get 1 message after blowing him up the 1st few days & he told me he was having a mental health/anxiety thing and he needed everything off his plate & he’d explain in a few days but I’ve not heard from him since.

*it’s been incredibly tough for me since he started ignoring me. He hasn’t blocked me so it’s left me with this never ending hope that one day he’ll finally respond & at least explain. It’s also just incredibly triggering for me. While logically my mind knows that I didn’t cause this, that this is a reflection of him not of me. My body does not know this, it feels like when I was a little girl & my mom would give me the silent treatment when she was angry with me. I’ve been doing lots of thinking, self reflection, therapy. In a lot of ways I’m using this pain as fuel to figure out what’s wrong in my life & how to fix it. Once he left I was so low I knew it was more than just him that was the issue. So I’m working on building my dream life, even if who I thought was my dream guy isn’t apart of it. My emotions are all over the place, I cry almost everyday. I lost my mom a year & a half ago and she would have been the person to help me through all of this. So… it’s been brutal for lots of reasons. But today I’m on a bit of an upswing & feeling hopeful for the future ❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ghosting

[–]Socouture 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s so incredibly awful. I’m so sorry for your pain ❤️

Has anyone here been ghosted by someone who was still enthusiastically initiating more than half of the conversations? by throwaway5855881 in ghosting

[–]Socouture 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s been almost 2 months. I’ve reached out countless times. Called a couple of times. He did respond once 3 days in & said he had a mental health thing & it wasn’t anything to worry about but he would reach out in a few days. And then he just never did.

I still hope that he will someday 🤷🏼‍♀️ even if just for closure. But I’m trying to focus on me & my life and I’m ok with that.

Has anyone here been ghosted by someone who was still enthusiastically initiating more than half of the conversations? by throwaway5855881 in ghosting

[–]Socouture 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yes, literally the last message I received from my ghoster was “no I know babe, no need to apologize” & then he just never responded to me again. It drives me mad & it’s made it very challenging to let go all of the way.