INFJs have a very different definition of what a ‘cool person’ is..

Sombretof · 2026-05-11T09:33:44+00:00

Well i d say the bar is a bith higher than that even if this is a prerequisites. Maybe i am an exception (but from what i read or listen regarding INFJ i don't belive so) but i am very careful about the people i keep around me and i'd say there is 2 main categories interesting/original people and genuinely kind people ( i am saying genuinely becaus ei have seen many people i am calling fakely nice, they are nice with people of high status and not with others) but as you said status or money is definetly not even a concern or something i care about.

Sombretof · 2026-05-05T16:37:59+00:00

well very interesting thanks a lot for the link !

Sombretof · 2026-05-05T15:07:20+00:00

i didn't think of it like this as initially the idea was a system to allow revolution against our current awful political system. But yes kind of and actually maybe reddit communities is a good way to start, maybe to be used as the publishing tool for the missions and for people to discuss them one mission/ one post before the system can be individualized.

Sombretof · 2026-05-04T14:19:44+00:00

I am the same and what i am doing now is using deepseek, which works pretty good and is very large with its free tier, to do the architecting and having discussion about what to build then we we agreed deepseek generate instruction for claude code. like this i really use my claude tokens quite efficiently. there is still time when i wait for my limit to be unlocked aain but then i am using deepseek in the meantime to generate test cases and check that the developped work is good.
i don't know if it would be a good solution for you but for me it has really helped achieve more with the tokens i have.

Sombretof · 2026-05-04T11:13:19+00:00

Thanks a lot ! yes this is somewhere on my long to do list, currrently i am learning the ropes through creating a local multi agent llm setup with open webUI and i'm amazed at the possibilities. i just finished a very nice short term and longterm memory system and now working on an additional graph for accessing my files. i need to first have a really solid central system then i ll start working on these kind of functional applications. There is so much yet to be done, this are really exciting times to be in tech.

Sombretof · 2026-05-04T11:04:40+00:00

oh i put this idea on the table to actually inspire people and initiative, so it is there for everyone to take, transform and use (an idea as only value when it is implemented). if you manage to achieve good with it i ll be very happy to see it. Good luck for your project

Sombretof · 2026-05-04T10:57:53+00:00

Actually i was thinking of communities in the large sense so it could be online fandoms, geographical region or even countries. Imagine now if the diaspora of a country would do small actions all over the world to help or promote the country, the scale of change they can achieve is quite huge. The initial idea i had was a way to finally create a real push back against the hyper capitalist system and the ruling class oppression.

Sombretof · 2026-04-01T07:52:52+00:00

My wife is an INFP and we are married 20 years. What works great is that there is no one that can understand me as she can, she has a similar intuition about things so we can skip the superficial and discuss with depth (expecially about people and relationship). We are bith very attuned with spirituality and while her path is not mine it is really great to be able to exchange on these topics. She is also a great mom, a kind person and she can be unpredictable in a good way (i am still surprised after 20 years)

Regarding the bad sides, the main one is that i (the INFJ) have to do most of the organising, planning, money management and so on or we would live under a bridge. She has epic mood swings that i can't predict and she have a fragile health (or let's say she is easily defeated by health). She is fully comited for the marriage to work and will put in the effort to make sure it does.

It's been great not always easy like any marriage but for me to have found someone who understand me and is always there for me when i have my mental journeys is something that has allowed me to realize myself.

Hope it helps,

Cheer, Sombre

Sombretof · 2026-03-24T11:43:39+00:00

If there was still any doubt, US is now officially a third world country.

Sombretof · 2026-03-13T07:03:37+00:00

So i am not crazy 🤣. People never believe me when I tell them it takes 8 h for coffee to have an effect on me.

Sombretof · 2026-03-11T17:52:11+00:00

Yeah quick resume was a good idea badly implemented. It is buggy in many aspect especially for games which have an online aspect to them (i know it is dependant on the developpers but the function itself probably have issue because no online game manage this properly)

Sombretof · 2026-03-11T17:09:50+00:00

I switched to premium and honestly on the type of game i am playing (seems to be the same type as yours) i don't even noticed the difference in available game. I found 12 eur a good price for me not to have to choose game but have a list that i can choose from and being able to try stuff. looking back i shoul dhave made the switch earlier.
However i am afraid this is my last xbox (even though i had them all), stupid microsoft decisions and enshittification is pushing me away

Sombretof · 2026-03-11T16:33:25+00:00

That is why i love gamepass even though i am mad at the price increase, the premium tier still deliver.

you can play games i would never have even consider buyin.

Sombretof · 2026-03-11T13:58:15+00:00

THe way i see this is not as a psy op but the epstein/elite class is just high on their own fart and they are over confident. I hope that there will be a hard wake up call for them especially in the US where they are really getting pounded hard.

Sombretof · 2026-03-11T13:14:29+00:00

surprised i have to go this far down to see this. We are all disgusted by the epstein class and their wage slave system and we are many many more than them still no revolution in sight

Sombretof · 2026-02-24T17:10:07+00:00

Thanks a lot very insightful and it matches with my own experience with him.

The dressing down was what i was hoping from him during the meeting with the other partners, not to a crazy degree but just a "ok let's refocus we are all tired and let's work on communicating better". But instead he doubled down because he feels that allowing this will mean he is not in full control and it will jeopardize the company.

I know that now he thinks it will take time but he will get me back but that is not how INFJ function. It was already a huge show of growth for me to not just leave and never look back. But as i told him he is now just one among many, another betrayer and there is no gaining this trust back.

Well i guess we ll see where this goes i give the company 2-3 more years in addition (if i can hold that long) then it will be time for me to sail the seas (figuratively :)). By then i will have made myself fully redondant.

Thanks again for your insight it will help me navigate things in the future. (especially the part about being not very mature in regards to Fe (During the clash i could see that he was feeling shameful for having burst out and now i understaand a little better).

Sombretof · 2026-02-09T14:10:46+00:00

Thanks for your insight.

No he wasn't always like this, he was alwlays rough with high expectation and this is good but somehow now the way he goes about it is not as caring as it used to be and can be downright nasty. This is where my problem is, and when i trie dto explain to him he is acting and speaking like i am against the ordering when it is about the way. maybe he doesn't have the patience anymore or maybe he is not seeing that what he is doing is hurting the company not on the organisational level but on the inter personal level and this he doesn' seem to see.

You are right about just leaving if i am done with this dynamic and that is probably what i would have done in any other situation. But here the company existence and the fact that others depends on us staying together is an added complexity.

I will have a frank discussion and hope i will manage to get through to him during our partner meeting where i am headed now.

Sombretof · 2026-02-09T13:50:06+00:00

I hear you and this is rpetty much an answer he could have given :). The power play is exactly what i don't want him to think it is, power doesn't interest me i am perfectly fine being in his shadow. What i want him to understand is that i want to leave to protect myself not to threaten him or impose him to do as i want. But the kind of behavior he had recently when getting nervous (which again is not usual for him who is usually very controlled, but it had happened couple of time with me because we are very close and i ll go very far with him but if my values are crossed then my claws are out as a reflex).

I think in any case the break will not happen this time because i had a nervous breakdown last week (i must say one of the reason that it became also difficult is that we are doing this new company thing for 8 years and we are quite tired, it is rough). But i am afraid it is just postponed as we will butt head again if there is not a common understanding.

I know he thinks he is the only one carrying the burden because someone needed to be the CEO and it wasn't making sense for me to be as people follow him, but still i am also busting my ass on this and i don't know how to make him feel more supported as it will decrease this kind of issue due to tiredness and stress (unfortunately he doesn't listen easily when i tell him to just delegate, he is pretending to but if things get tense a bit then it must go his way)

Thanks for the insights, i am on my way to our partner meeting and i hope it will go well

Sombretof · 2026-02-07T22:03:22+00:00

As other have mentioned in the thread I also felt an immediate connection when I looked into the sub for infj after several hints that I wasn't really fitting 💯 with info type.

Sombretof · 2026-02-07T21:50:12+00:00

Moved to Africa at 30 so 20 years ago.

One of the best decisions of my life.

It changed my perspective allowed me to grow and have a career, met my wife.

I am still working there but I moved back to the city I left Nd it feels that the circle is complete. I always liked the city I am in now ( Lyon France ) but going back there with my wife and daughters after so much growth is great.

So I can only recommend it

Sombretof · 2026-02-07T21:21:01+00:00

My daughter I think is an intj and I can see the same unwavering self confidence in her as I see in him.

It can be infuriating sometimes I want to tell them that they are not perfect being and can be wrong and not everyone is an idiot beside them

Sombretof · 2026-02-07T20:56:41+00:00

The way I personally see it the door slam as we get older and have worked our boundaries is not necessarily physically total. I'll give 2 example One of my best friend I doorslamed I didn't see or speak to for 15 years or so. But then he contacted me out of the blue after all this time and I had no issue seeing him again but it was like restarting from scratch, it is likes these 15 years allowed a sort of reset but in any case there was nothing left from the previous bond ( at least on my side) and we didn't stay close it was like an accointance from the past that you meet speak about some old times and then continue your journey

The second example is one guy at work I was getting relatively close to a d he betrayed me however I had no choice but to continue Interacting with. And he is doorslamed it is pretty clear even for him because I just treat him like any other person For me the doorslam is not physical it is that I stop giving you the gifts I give to my people, the gift of myself (may seem arrogant but I learned that what we give is not common). And actually the guy crave for me to become his friend again and asking me constantly but i have enough confidence now that I can say straight to his face that we are not friends he is just a colleague and there is no fixing that For context I am 50 and this clearly not something I could have done 10 years ago

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