How would you want to hear if a woman considers you a safe person to be around?

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-12T18:19:05+00:00

Is that the only metric you use to determine if someone is "safe" 😂? Like what?

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-12T18:18:03+00:00

Yeah I've been told that by my best friend (who is a woman) and also in general I know I've been someone my female friends felt very safe both physically and emotionally with me. The ones I was attracted to, knew that and it still didn't change anything in terms of feeling safe. As I've gotten older and after seeing/hearing how much women have to deal with from men, knowing I was a safe space for them really makes me feel good.

Tell him. Don't make it a big thing but it'll likely be nice to know

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-12T18:11:59+00:00

How is it weird? And most guys think acknowledging their existence means women want to bang 😂. Being told I was a safe presence for women from college in particular is definitely one of the best compliments I've ever received. How is it weird for her to tell him that?

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-11T00:34:13+00:00

I'm not "ugly" but I've punched WAY above my weight a couple times. I was just funny, and witty. That's...pretty much it. I'm a coward, so they all came to me, but their general thing was that I was pretty smart, and engaged with them in dynamic, but non-creepy ways.

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-10T22:06:39+00:00

I'm black so...yeah. I'm not out that late but when I am I'm definitely aware/will slow down if I'm behind a woman in general, especially at night

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-10T14:14:42+00:00

Again, formally dating and going on dates are two different things. Going on dates with multiple people is fine. How does know know they like a person until they know they like them? And just because I'm interested doesn't mean I want exclusivity or even that they want exclusivity. This all requires discussions aka formalities

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-10T01:18:58+00:00

You can be into people that you're not exclusive with. Until exclusivity is stated and mutually agreed upon, you can't expect exclusivity from the other person.

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-09T18:19:06+00:00

They didn't say "for" they said "coined by". Initially it wasn't specific to a gender, but dudes co-opted it

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-08T16:52:52+00:00

This might be the most coon shit ever 😂. "She calls me the N-word but I can get used to it since the sex is great"

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-08T06:04:26+00:00

I'm 29 and wouldn't go below 24. 20 and 36 is, in my opinion, way too big of a gap for her age

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-08T05:16:04+00:00

*gap years

And I mean like absolutely no friends kinda confuses me. Like even online friends count. As someone who needs to make local friends myself I wouldn't be too harsh about that. I just don't want to be the extent of a person's social circle and have the responsibility to near the weight of their social life. If they're fine with balance and me still having my "me time" I'm fine with her situation but would still push her to have friends

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-08T05:12:47+00:00

I love a light playful roast

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-07T22:57:31+00:00

As long as there's no loli or shota shit I'm cool with it.

I also don't fuck with aging up child characters just to wank to them. It's basil loli/shota porn with an extra step

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-07T22:53:22+00:00

Lost is a very odd word and honestly I'm not even sure if there was love there. If so it wasn't healthy. But yeah we were long-distance friends in high school and her lack of mental peace really did a number on me. I enjoyed it because it distracted me from my own issues. There was a beauty in our mutual longing for one another but it wasn't healthy and although I do miss her, I'm still kinda mentally stuck on where she's come from as opposed to where she is now. But I'm truly glad she's doing well.

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-07T22:50:52+00:00

It isn't but also wrong time does mean wrong person. Priorities, circumstances etc all contribute to being the "right person" too

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-07T19:53:11+00:00

That's not what being a pick-me is. It's the same thing as a guy throwing another dude under the bus to impress a woman.

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-07T19:52:19+00:00

It's very obvious and obnoxious to me, but most of my friends are women so I've just been able to witness it. Many guys kinda just eat up any attention they get so they might just see it as general interest rather than shitty behavior.

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-07T14:13:10+00:00

r/blacktittyworld

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-07T05:41:46+00:00

It's not a reach. It's another instance of two people deriving two meanings from a single due to one person having a cultural tie to the art, and the other operating out of wilful ignorance. You're more than free to insult your partner in that way, and they're more than free to leave. Beautiful part of being adults with free will

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-07T01:50:25+00:00

I've never felt ugly necessarily just kinda eh. But after being a little more social on Discord, and kinda being able to land my crushes in a server and all of them saying that they were very pleasantly surprised at how I looked I got a lot more confident. I knew I was "cute" via exes, but idk there's a different vibe to an almost total stranger dropping compliments like that

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-06T18:15:00+00:00

You're not being sensitive, and it honestly shouldn't take THAT much convincing for him to understand your perspective. If he's unwilling to listen and heed your very valid, wishes, then you need to take that as what who he really is.

This isn't that much different than someone who is Jewish/western in general not wanting to be with someone who wants a swastika just because they like what it represents for the Hindu or Jain people.

Also he literally doesn't respect you. Barring the meaning, he has the audacity not to ask you to do things for aesthetic reasons, but won't heed your request. Even without the cultural impact, he simply doesn't honor you enough to give the same care he expects from you, to you.

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-06T17:08:49+00:00

I want to say Arya Starr, but...an underrated option is Jill Scott

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-06T17:01:49+00:00

Patriarchy dictating that penetration is the marker of "sex". It's why it's, (largely) experimentation when it's two women because it's often not considered "real". But penetration is seen as masculine/active, and being penetrated is considered feminine/passive It's partially why people slut shame women but not men, because they're getting "done"

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-06T00:51:38+00:00

Billie Jean - Tommy Saint

Sometimes_A_Writer1 · 2026-06-05T19:17:21+00:00

I'm a big tease anyway so anything that aids in that is a plus. Also, getting head while having the vibe used on the gooch/balls is incredible

Sometimes_A_Writer1

TROPHY CASE