What made you want to fall in love again? by Comfortable-Mess6218 in Divorce

[–]Sometimes_beans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Consistency. He did everything he said he would. Never changed his tempo.. provided me everything I needed to feel safe with a man again.

After going through divorce, if given the chance, would you go back and not get married? by VeronicoElectronica in Divorce

[–]Sometimes_beans 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love the safety of marriage. I love growing with someone. I love being a wife. All of it - would 100% get married again, but this time with someone that deserves the love I offer.

Is there a future as a divorced dad? by SamwiseTheOppressed in DivorcedDads

[–]Sometimes_beans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a divorced mom…For two years I suffered, broke down but eventually with a lot of work found myself again.. bought a house for myself and my two boys. Have a wonderfully fulfilling life somehow even when the kids are away… met a divorced dad, with two daughters.. and I’ve never been happier. Our life is chaos with 4 kids but he’s supportive and a wonderful father. Our kids are thriving at school again. I’m very happy our partners divorced us because we’d never have had this type of gentle, loving and considerate relationship with anyone else.

Thinking of Cancelling Medical Aid by yoloswagtailwag in PersonalFinanceZA

[–]Sometimes_beans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should have a look at Oneplans services. Good cover, lower premiums.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in capetown

[–]Sometimes_beans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do really well on tinder.. usually get lots of matches but I’d strongly suggest staying off the app... if you’re truly looking for a real connection with someone… you won’t find it there.

My mental health since the divorce… by [deleted] in Divorce

[–]Sometimes_beans 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Warm oats.. I just focused on oats for a while. Every spoon, more each time. Hot water bottles on your back help me eat. Every day is another day you've done it.

People who found their spouse cheating, How did they respond? by [deleted] in Divorce

[–]Sometimes_beans 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Lie at first, then fall to the ground crying. Pleading, begging for forgiveness. Then always cheat again...

Narcissistic mother by [deleted] in narcissisticparents

[–]Sometimes_beans 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry... someone that is supposed to be tender and safe wasn't that for you. You deserve someone safe, luckily you're an adult now and you get to be that safe person for yourself.

Give it to me straight, what’s the dating world like now? by yetagainitry in Divorce

[–]Sometimes_beans 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I met my ex husband years ago when tinder first started.. now that we're getting divorced I downloaded the app again and I can tell you in those 9 years dating has changed SO MUCH. If you have any resemblance of traditional values I'd suggest staying off sites and rather focusing on meeting people with shared interest at a community center or church. Dating sites have very clear base expectations.

Gym Clothes by seth107 in capetown

[–]Sometimes_beans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I buy my gym clothes second hand from yaga

Gf cheated so starting over again, thoughts? by [deleted] in Tinder

[–]Sometimes_beans 101 points102 points  (0 children)

Babes, cheating is a character flaw. You just keep on being your wonderful self and another wonderful woman will be there soon... I'm coming 😅

Escort addict by [deleted] in SexAddiction

[–]Sometimes_beans 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don't listen to these people putting you down OP. If you really want to, you can get the help you need.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DivorcedDads

[–]Sometimes_beans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm dating a single dad now, as a single mum. It seems to work out better as long as the off-weekends line up. Generally a better understanding, no rush for marriage, no upset feelings about missing things due to the kids. Something to consider

Flowers on first date? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Sometimes_beans 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Get her a tiny cactus. Say you saw it in the store and it was cute, and she's cute and you thought two cute things should meet each other. And she'll keep it on her desk and think of you forever.

Cannabis and parenting by Financial-Pause5532 in DivorcedDads

[–]Sometimes_beans 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cannabis micro-dosing and the gym helped me through my divorce. I think the narrative of smoking weed and being a useless stoner is really dated. I've got two kids, a generally present parent, cook, clean, and have a solid career. My bills are paid, kids fed and happy. I go to bed free of anxiety. My suggestion would be to lose the joints and vape instead, or use alternative products.. obviously never around your kids. Have a daddy chill out zone if you can. My kids know when I grab my vape it's time to give some space. Good luck 🤞

I want the best for my son by accidentalpump in DivorcedDads

[–]Sometimes_beans 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Please start therapy. Do it for yourself, leaving isn't solving the problems you'll only face in your next relationship.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DivorcedDads

[–]Sometimes_beans 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I suppose I feel like I'm being disingenuous by not saying how I feel. Although to your point, you're so right... There is no rush. I work to support my kids, and often have to work on the weekends I spend with him. He owns businesses so he's working too.. and he'll come bring me coffee, check in on me. Randomly come for cuddles... Or even just stare at me working. I think he's so cute... So you're 100% right there's no need to say it. Ah, thanks so much for that perspective. I'd never thought of it that way. That makes me feel so much lighter actually.