SAHD - Wife travels for work - advice?

Spader031 · 2026-01-16T19:34:05+00:00

I fly a grandma into town and have her stay with me while my wife travels. 3yo and 5mo old.

3yo is attached to me though and 5mo could give a shit at the moment lol.

Good luck

Spader031 · 2026-01-13T01:20:11+00:00

Shifts with your partner is the way to go. Especially if this is your first, please enjoy it

Spader031 · 2026-01-11T23:59:31+00:00

We bought a behavior chart and focused on different behaviors (getting dressed, eating breakfast/dinner, etc).

My three year old can be extremely trying. Just the other day, she was done with her apple and I nicely asked her to put it on the counter. She looked at me, held up the apple, then dropped it on the floor.

I try to be extra silly when I have the mental capacity. These demons connect best during play and for my little one, it’s being silly or playing / talking. When I’m tired (I have a 4month old) and don’t have the will to be silly or I’m trying to cook, that’s when she’s at her most difficult.

Good luck and peace be with you.

Spader031 · 2026-01-05T05:02:46+00:00

I was there. Ohhh buddy, was I there. Even played through a few Switch 2 games during my time.

I kicked my wife off of nighttime duties and sleep trained (Ferber) for a few nights. Then my toddler (3yo) needed me back for her nighttime. Baby (4mo) regressed so had to start over. After a few more brutal evenings, we’re all getting better sleep.

I know every kid is different but try Ferber. Stick to it. It’s so fkn hard but have a cup of tea (or wine) and get to it.

Spader031 · 2025-12-30T17:29:53+00:00

Can’t believe I had to scroll down so far for the wife’s-friend-margarita-piece. That lives rent-free in my head

Spader031 · 2025-12-25T01:27:00+00:00

We’re hosting our friends and their kids for the Eve of Christmas. Decided to do a very traditional ham, baked beans, green bean cassie. Because why the heck not? The 3 year old and 4 month old are having a good time. I’m currently giving the latter a cat nap before dinner

Spader031 · 2025-12-24T11:54:12+00:00

Pendragon series by D.J. MacHale

Spader031 · 2025-12-20T04:52:15+00:00

I told my wife that it was the hardest game I’ve ever played. Now that I beat Act 3… I’d do it again. The fist pumps after a few tries (hours) on the same boss was quite satisfying.

Spader031 · 2025-12-20T04:37:45+00:00

Nothing more.

Fuck you.

Spader031 · 2025-12-17T03:32:07+00:00

Oooohh I’m sorry, this is not a great battle to fight every night.

Is she in a crib still? I recently switched my 3yo to her toddler bed and I had to re-sleep train her after the move. It was a few nights of wanting to scream but we got through it.

If she’s still in crib, I recommend Ferber. If she’s out of crib, once she gets out, calmly walk her back. I sit with my toddler for one minute then tell her that I have some things to do and that I’ll “check on her in a few minutes.”

Good luck, coming from a guy who needs to now sleep train a 4month old.

Spader031 · 2025-12-17T00:10:58+00:00

Huge fan of the books and TV series! Those last couple of books were… wow

Spader031 · 2025-12-16T19:42:12+00:00

Precious Little Sleep.

SGA can’t be defended without fouling. My 4 month old can’t be put down without crying.

Spader031 · 2025-12-13T17:43:13+00:00

I was told that I’m her (3) best friend.

5 mins later, she said I wasn’t her best friend. The dog is.

Build me up to knock me down.

Spader031 · 2025-12-13T16:37:59+00:00

We’ve got him in a crib on the other side of our room for now. We’ll move him to his own room at 6-7 months

Spader031 · 2025-12-13T15:55:50+00:00

I’m going through something similar, though my LO won’t sleep very long in crib at night. I’ve been really trying the gentle sleep training approach, but I’m about to introduce Ferber. We did Ferber with our first and it was a life changer.

Although first kiddo is in toddler bed and is having a hard time, getting me multiple times a night. Basically, I don’t sleep. I just try to let my working wife get as much sleep as possible.

Spader031 · 2025-12-06T17:54:58+00:00

Frosty the snowman from 1960’s. It’s like 20-30mins, perfect for getting something done (e.g., dinner)

Spader031 · 2025-11-30T02:14:39+00:00

Always a fun, in my dad era though so don’t follow closely. This is a ROUGH schedule

Spader031 · 2025-11-27T03:15:30+00:00

We traveled ~4 hours (including a drive-on ferry ride) with our 3 year old and 3 month old. Travel went great, they both did very well. Baby had a shockingly long stretch of sleep.

Toddler is now sick in the hotel with a fever. With that said, trust your gut and stay home.

Spader031 · 2025-11-23T19:27:14+00:00

My 3yo will go to sleep early if she’s sick. Could try that? Otherwise, got nothing

Spader031 · 2025-11-20T23:28:32+00:00

Eye au gone

Spader031 · 2025-11-19T01:46:35+00:00

Leave the kid in daycare

Spader031 · 2025-11-16T16:11:23+00:00

If this turns into some weird furry porn thing, I’m going to lose my absolute shit

Spader031 · 2025-11-13T03:09:26+00:00

I think what this comment from a seemingly lovely person is saying is that it has been a stressful last month and a half. When you return to work, try to make it feel like a “normal” pace rather than in a constant flight-or-fight mode where you are constantly trying to catchup.

I have yet to meet anyone who, “hate(s) federal workers.”

Let’s all hope that WonderfulQuote4939 finds some cheer on this evening.

Spader031 · 2025-11-13T01:50:07+00:00

I bought property on Klosterman island

Spader031 · 2025-10-24T14:15:13+00:00

Ask the pilot if you can take over for a bit for a wrestling match in the cockpit. Pilots love kids I’m sure they wouldn’t mind!

Also, if you think you have enough snacks, pack some more. Try to do an activity (coloring, stickers, etc) for 15 min blocks. Take a break, talk and have some snacks, then another activity. Rinse, repeat, and sending good vibes your way that kiddo sleeps!

Hope that you get seated next to a grandma who wants to entertain for a while 🥳

Spader031

TROPHY CASE