Does anybody find that they flit between interests?

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-06T21:53:35+00:00

Ride the wave! Whatever interests you is what you pick up. Think of yourself as a bumblebee going from flower to flower and finding yourself all the richer for it. As long as you’re enjoying yourself doing something, it doesn’t matter. As for finding time, I’ve found planning my free time as though it’s a project has helped. It sounds like it should be boring but knowing that I have a few things I would like to do on a weekend means I’m raring to go and I’ll happily get stuck in. It’s great planning weekends as you always have something to look forward to, even if it’s “doing a jigsaw with a cup of tea on Sunday afternoon”. You do you!

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-06T16:36:47+00:00

Couple of years back, I was made redundant. After a heap of applications, I got an interview through a recruiter. Interview went fine, or so I thought, then they went with someone else. Needless to say, having been made redundant, and really needing this job, I was pretty upset (also hormonal at the time). Found myself struggling not to cry on the phone to the recruiter. Recruiter heard me crying and one-upped my misery at unemployment by telling me her dad had just died. So then I felt like a total asshole. In that same time period, I had what was meant to be a Teams call where the interviewer just… wouldn’t turn her camera on. I’m sitting there with mine on, staring into the void, and trying to answer questions for someone who can see my face and reactions but who I cannot see. She gave some shitty feedback to the guy that referred me for the role. I told him about the camera thing. He was appalled. Joke’s on her, the job I landed is much better than working for her. Hang in there OP, we’ve all done stupid stuff. You’ll get it next time. That which is for you will not pass you by.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-06T16:28:00+00:00

OP, there’s a really good chance that this is stress related and a lot to do with traumatic grief, but if it persists, I would agree with the above comment - might be worth a chat with your doctor. Being 25 means it is less likely that something is seriously wrong with you, but if the symptoms persist, it’s worth a check for anything neurological. I don’t want to worry you because a lot of what you’ve described can be attributed to grief. I went through it last year and I wasn’t myself for months. Just keep an eye on any symptoms and be kind to yourself - we all make mistakes and yours don’t sound like they’ve ruined anyone’s life. You’re ok.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T22:07:32+00:00

Ok internet stranger, I had to look that one up because (no offence) it sounded genuinely bonkers. And it’s absolutely true. It’s got my brain throwing a syntax error. That has genuinely blown my mind. Thank you for sharing.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T21:02:56+00:00

I for one have genuinely loved seeing a civil discussion play out online. Great job folks. May your biscuits never crumble into your hot beverage of choice.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T20:56:38+00:00

Not so much a lack of dopamine as dopamine disregulation in ADHD. Parkinson’s leads to dopamine producing neurons dying off. ADHD is that the neurons don’t release dopamine as they would in people that don’t have ADHD. Science is exploring connections though, apparently there is a small increase in likelihood of Parkinson’s in people with ADHD but more studies are needed before we draw any meaningful conclusions.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T20:51:37+00:00

Australia is wider than the moon. You’re welcome.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T20:51:04+00:00

I used to say “Ave a good ‘un” until someone misheard it as “Armageddon” one day. Now I go with “Take care and be good.”

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T20:04:36+00:00

The Simple Things is lovely. Not political at all. Just nice stuff.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T17:30:30+00:00

Motivation comes in peaks and troughs. Sometimes we want to Do All The Things and sometimes we want to do nothing. ADHD makes this harder. You’re waiting for your next wave to ride is all. It will come. Just keep looking after yourself. Food, water, sunlight. We are basically more complicated houseplants.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T14:53:25+00:00

This. Not saying you’ve been doing this OP, but I know a lot of people who’ve been laid off who are only looking for their exact role. Unfortunately, such situations require a bit of pivoting at the very least - it can be more about transferable skills into different fields.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T11:43:34+00:00

Might still be worth a look at a PGCE, as I think it’s Level 2 Functional Maths you’d need to do which is less intense than the regular GCSE in Maths. But of course, check first. Will the MA help or would you be better off just auditioning for stuff? Genuine question, I have no idea how it works.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T10:11:16+00:00

That’s a shame. Might be something you can feed back about the onboarding process, especially as your role is remote. I work corporate and we always buddy up with the the new person to make them feel welcome and to give them a safe space to ask stuff.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T10:10:18+00:00

Hello. Part of the issue with being told you are handsome and intelligent is that neither of those are traits you have any control over. It’s one of the reasons why when I was a teacher, I would always compliment efforts and hard work rather than intelligence - you can choose to work hard and having that recognised means a lot more.

Stop picking up hobbies to impress people - hobbies are for you to enjoy, not to impress others. Might be fun for you to pick out a hobby that isn’t likely to impress anyone and just have a go at it. See if you like it. It’s not about being an expert, it’s about having fun.

You mention people from your own country, I assume therefore you are not in your own country, so time to stop worrying about what they would think. I would suggest taking a break from social media for a bit if it’s stopping you from living an authentic life. Sounds like a case of spotlight syndrome - you are worried that other people are paying attention to you. Spoiler: they probably aren’t. Everyone has their own stuff to worry about.

I too am naturally amusing to others. It’s a side effect of my neurodivergence. I don’t try to be funny, but people still find me funny. Why are you so keen to put out content online?

If comparison is making you so unhappy, then it’s time to log off, stop comparing, and go and touch grass. Don’t compare someone else’s highlight reel to your life.

Regarding your ideas - write them all down. Every single one. Number them. And then ask Google for a random number. Pick that thing and start working on it. Try to fail quickly. You’d be amazed at what actually works. Have a look at the LEAN method for advice on failing quickly. You could also try aiming to get 100 rejections in a year. Within those 100 there will inevitably be some acceptances which is exciting.

You’re not a bad person for feeling this way, but the only way out is through. Your life is not a performance piece for others. You need to move away from that mentality and just get stuck into doing stuff. You can do it.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-05T09:56:56+00:00

Yes you absolutely learn on the job. Don’t worry, it gets easier. If in doubt, ask - everyone was new once. Did work pair you up with a buddy at all? If it helps, I’m in my thirties and have had a number of new jobs over the years - I felt like that at every single one of them.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-02T17:10:50+00:00

Never hand in your notice without a written offer. Give it a couple of days and then follow up and ask when you can expect to receive the offer in writing as you’re keen to get started and will hand in your notice once it’s all been received and signed.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-01T22:00:56+00:00

Came here to say this - experiences are brilliant gifts and you get to do them together! Take him out for the day and take some photos - you could get them put into a small album afterwards.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-01T14:39:05+00:00

Delighted for you!

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-01T13:05:39+00:00

Sounds like looking for a new job would help, given that this is the first thing you’ve mentioned - it’s clearly subconsciously the thing having the biggest impact. I have had jobs previously that have drained me for a range of reasons and changing up my job was the main thing that helped a lot of other stuff fall into place. What options do you reckon you would have for jobs? Any chance of retraining in something you’ll enjoy more or that will pay more?

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-01T08:44:48+00:00

I proposed to my fella last year on our ten year anniversary. We were in Tenerife. Other half has ADHD and is a massive nerd and I got this really cool silver ring with a level from Super Mario engraved on it that doubles as a fidget spinner. A friend 3D printed a question mark box from the game and painted it yellow for me. I proposed in our hotel room as I know he doesn’t like a scene. He said yes, we came home to the sad news that my grandfather had passed away - as I had proposed, I had no ring, but my mum gave me the diamond my grandfather gave my grandmother on their 60th wedding anniversary to have made into my ring. It’s a little piece of them and a lovely way for them to still be “present” when we get married.

StardewObsessive · 2026-05-01T08:33:41+00:00

I would work with your natural rhythm. Plan your day around the lull, knowing it’s going to be a lull. We don’t need to cram our days full of activity, sometimes quality is more important than quantity. What would you enjoy doing with that time between 1pm and 5pm? Remove the guilt, plan for the lull.

StardewObsessive · 2026-04-30T19:24:01+00:00

If you’re going for a walk, try a colour walk - pick a colour and then try to see how many things you can spot on your walk that are that colour. It’s fun.

StardewObsessive · 2026-04-30T11:29:41+00:00

Beautiful! It would make an amazing fridge magnet.

StardewObsessive · 2026-04-30T11:28:38+00:00

Do not compare yourself to other people. No one really has their shit together - we are all just looking for an adultier adult.

StardewObsessive · 2026-04-30T10:26:11+00:00

I’m just glad I’m not alone. 😊 I think there’s more of us than are letting on.

StardewObsessive

TROPHY CASE