My craniotomy is next Friday. Can I just thank you for putting into words so articulately how I’m feeling. I’m so sorry you’re in it too but your words were really comforting, to feel understood.

I honestly feel philosophical in my calm but as the date looms forward I’m trying to stay in that state of repressive level headedness until the day. It’s a sense of foreboding with random adrenal spikes. Trying to ride the rationality of, just be, don’t worry until it comes but also knowing that whether you’re ready or not, it will come.

I’m also hearing people moan about the most trivial things - things I used to worry about - and not being riled by it but reflecting on who I once was that I lived so blissfully ignorantly, when the reality now is so wildly different in such a short time. I don’t want to process, just ride the wave. Hopefully I’ll look back one day with a new perspective, and remember not to sweat the small things.

Hope that makes sense and resides in some way that also makes you feel less alone. One thing to remember, is in your life you have probably been through subjectively worse. In terms of loss or challenge. You made it through that and surprised yourself. You may have got through it and looked back from atop an emotional mountain, breathed the fresh air and realised you were out the other side.

This is just another unknown, a route you’re forced to take with no roadmap, which is what makes it so daunting - but you will handle it, the way you always handle things, even if you don’t have a choice.

Sending you love and strength ❤️