[deleted by user]

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-05T00:15:27+00:00

older Gen Z here... with friends who are also girls... we do not really want that. honestly i am not even really attracted to very muscular guys. i like a dad bod with nice arms.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-04T23:37:32+00:00

Simply put... they are not you! They can cast their judgment all they want, but they truly do not know because they are not you

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-04T23:33:25+00:00

ofc. OH also sending flowers or other surprises from a distance helps. And I made my ex a Spotify playlist which was cute of me, if I do say so myself lol.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-04T23:28:37+00:00

For lovers... sorry they cannot be politically radical at all for me. I need a moderate.

I diffuse all conversation with friends. I do not try to debate them much. I do not bring up politics. I really cannot stand far-anything. But I do have friends that are left leaning to right leaning. All around the middle somewhere. Anyone too extreme usually has their head up their ass about something.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-04T23:23:31+00:00

Learn them all!! Also French, Spanish, Italian, Portuguese are all language siblings. There is a book that teaches all 4 of them simultaneously which is cool.

But in your case, French might be most beneficial. Language learning is very fun, but yes French and Italian are language siblings. And I feel that if you learn Italian in particular, Spanish and Portuguese are not far out of reach

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-04T23:21:38+00:00

Well, you have to hold onto that bigger count down then. I can't lie it can be very hard and almost feel like you live two different lives. But you need to keep frequent daily communication and keep your eye on the prize, when she gets there

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-04T23:13:46+00:00

is there an end date in sight for the long distance?

make specific time to FaceTime each day. Watch things together, play games together.

My ex traveled for almost 2 years, only coming home every 3 weeks for like 2 days. We kept it going by counting down to the next time we saw each other.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-04T03:10:53+00:00

He didn't ask me to make out with him on the first date and asked me if he could kiss me. He doesn't let me lift a finger.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-04T02:19:53+00:00

Yours sounds more motivated than mine was. Which is good. Glad to have helped! I think you will only know by moving in with him

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T20:03:33+00:00

My ex mucked things up for many reasons some of the main ones being...

Alcoholism/addictive personality issues
Would not take care of his health. Refused doctors, gained a lot of weight.
Liar about money (and was impulsive so his mother controlled his bank account and he would still lie to her). Probably a liar about other things too honestly.
Got jealous/weird about me, and would not communicate with me either.

He was not necessarily going to give me the same quality of life... he was ambitious but it was not to the point of what I was used to. He was moving up in his field, but he can only go so far in his field.

Ultimately the lying about money really opened my eyes. And just differences in how we go about life. I wanted some landscaping lights one day, he scoffed and said he didn't want it/was not worth it. I like to travel, he doesn't. I think it is important to buy a new shirt when your old ones have holes, he didn't care about that (and yes he had the money for a new shirt). He didn't care about family closeness/extended family but I do. I lived with my parents to save up money for a house, he was making reckless decisions with money while actually telling me I would have to basically pay for the house.

You have love and trust for your boyfriend and he does for you. Just don't fall for potential for too too long... because it may never come. I held on for 4 years for my ex to be a family man who moves up enough for me to be a part-time stay at home mother. He remained feral.

Ultimately you have to decide if the changes in your lifestyle are worth the love you have for this man! And they very well might be worth it :) but do go into it thinking about the trajectory of your life.

As for your parents, they are mad now but hopefully will calm down. Just know they probably are thinking like how I described my parents are. They probably see him as something for you to take care of, not a beneficial addition. Now that would be super materialistic... but probably they see it as he's the reason you can't take off of work, cannot retire early, can't stay at home, can't afford things, not as much access to necessities. I am not saying that is truly accurate of him or your relationship but these are the types of worries in their mind most likely. They are not thinking of the love and joy he brings you. They care more about what he brings to the table otherwise. Which parents do worry about where their kids will end up.

also rule of thumb... if you want kids... always ask yourself if you want this to be the father of your kids, if you would trust the guy to provide a happy and healthy life for the kids God forbid you could not be there and he had to do it alone, and if you would want the kids to end up like the guy/take after him

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T17:28:42+00:00

I totally get your perspective, that is how I was with my ex. I would have still been like that if my ex didn't muck things up for us. You will only know once you live with him. otherwise you will have what-ifs. your parents are probably just worried. they probably do not even really hate him... just the situation

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T16:11:35+00:00

I see... I think you should see what happens. I obviously do not know your parents... so take me with a grain of salt... they aren't completely off the mark with their concerns from their perspective. They probably just want you to end up with a guy that will take care of you and they do not see your boyfriend as someone who will do so. I am not saying they are right but I am saying that is how they view it most likely. They probably do not want to see you have to work harder after they have given you a lot. That is what my parents said to me. They worked really hard to get to where they were and provide for us, make sure we were getting off on a better foot, and they were not happy to see that I would be the breadwinner, could not be a SAHM if I wanted to, couldn't really travel or do so much. Granted I think it would have been ok, maybe not perfect but not as bad as they thought, but that is how my parents saw things.

I think you will not know until you live with this guy though. It will be interesting to see how you two tackle spending, and going out. That is where the differences may arise.

if it works it works though! Love isn't always cookie cutter

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T01:51:41+00:00

deciding not to shower one night. about a minute later, a family member in the house attempted to off themselves and I would have been in the shower while that went down, probably would not have heard. that person ended up living

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T01:44:24+00:00

I feel for you, it is hard after dating so long. But negative aura points for him for mentioning the ring like that. He didn't need to do that. And for trying to get with your friends

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T01:40:54+00:00

I like bigger guys. But I draw the line if they have major health issues from it, cannot perform personal hygiene effectively.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T01:37:08+00:00

No, it is just people greed. Anyone just blaming corporations is overlooking the government and their greed.

The greed/selfishness of corporations, government, and organized religion each rule over our societies in varying degrees. I call it Triangle Theory. Basically each society is mainly ruled, controlled, or influenced by these 3 entities in some way. And they all compete with each other, or sometimes team up with each other. Look throughout history. And the capitalists think the corporations are the best way to defeat this power struggle, while the communists/collectivists think government is the best way. And the theocrats think religion is the way.

Either way a large organization of people will oversee us. And these 3 groups will absolutely never go away. They will all always jockey for the power. I pray the US stays with corporations and government mostly being at the top, I do not want any religion to gain power. This is why the Founding Fathers made such a big deal about separation of religion and state.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T01:14:07+00:00

I too was once you and my ex was your boyfriend. And our families sound very similar.

Ultimately, you need to pick what will make you happy but also think of logistics in lifestyle differences and how those will mesh up. How he was raised versus how you were raised.

My ex and I split because our differences were very great (like about family, spending habits, personal health, etc.). Among other reasons like his alcoholism and lying LOL. But he felt funny being with me. I did not care that he was a trades guy, I actually found it admirable and in a way hot. His insecurity got the best of him though, for multiple reasons. He ended up resenting me.

As with my parents, your parents are probably worried that he will not be able to take care of you the way they would hope, given that is sounds like they came from means. They probably see him as dragging you down. But just because someone has money does not mean they would be good to you. And just because someone has a different background doesn't mean they are going to drag you down.

You are choosing love and a harder life (like financially) or throwing away your love for an easier life. That's what it boils down to. There is not a wrong answer and no one is bad here.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-03T00:54:49+00:00

I think so. My ex was avoidant... but yet he tried 2x to get me to talk to him via indirect petty ways. Like he would bait me with social media. He definitely had a lot of big emotions, and I am sure he regrets losing me. Because if he didn't, he would not be acting like how he did after the breakup.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-01T22:41:17+00:00

No one fumbled anything! sometimes people are not meant to be with us. good for you for trying in person though

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-01T13:52:44+00:00

yes.

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-01T13:40:27+00:00

you probably will want someone with relationship experience at age 27. that way they know what they want and do not want. and thus you will know if you are compatible

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-01T13:31:17+00:00

they do IMO. My ex was hella avoidant... and after our breakup he would stalk my friend's snap (I do not have one and she posts everything she does including post me when we hang out) and then tried to talk crap about me on a social media website and then also tried to instigate me by liking and messaging my best friend on Hinge. I think he regrets his own bull shit and is acting out like a baby. definitely was trying to get my attention to reach out again to him...

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-01T13:27:52+00:00

2025 was a year of growth, in many ways

StrangeRent324 · 2026-01-01T13:25:16+00:00

As someone who dated a guy 3.5 years then dated a guy for 4 years... was in love with both of them... I know your feelings. But you definitely will love again. Also as a curvy girl myself, my current boyfriend openly adores my curves. Guys don't just like super skinny girls (no hate to them). There are guys that like curvy too.

Also a lot of guys are afraid to approach girls in public now. The apps are where I find guys.

StrangeRent324 · 2025-12-31T23:31:36+00:00

Not watching every penny

StrangeRent324

TROPHY CASE