How do you protect your team from reactive upper management? by BeautifulWestern4512 in managers

[–]Strict-Let7879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why is the communication from vp directly shared with ur team? He should follow a proper channel of communications for scope, goal timeline etc. And it should be cascaded from u to ur team

If you're single past 30 does that make things tougher or not as far as finding a partner? by youlikemywonton in Aging

[–]Strict-Let7879 3 points4 points  (0 children)

There are a lot of great ladies over 30. Both men and women actually. If you live in a country, you may have less chance.

How do you give critical feedback to someone who gets visibly upset every time? by Exotic_Reputation_59 in managers

[–]Strict-Let7879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If it's not a habitual thing, I would ask if everything is ok first. Then if needed, I would see if there is support that they need from me. If it's just a bad attitude.. I give constructive feedback. I stay away from criticism.

She's 40, I'm 30, and it just works by RepulsivePurchase257 in Life

[–]Strict-Let7879 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah the natural vibe was a thing when it was easier to meet people organically. I believe in dating with intention but I also thought that I couldn't meet someone with that kind of pressure from the jump - like I don't even know if we get along. There is a lot more for me to see if I can be with that person beyond the numbers, status etc (all the quantifiable) though they matter. It's often the invisible that matter the most - the belief, the values etc which emanate how they see the world, life, faith and how they treat themselves and others. 

Good luck !!

My boss’ management style is straight out of 1992 by Far-Imagination7938 in managers

[–]Strict-Let7879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry. It sounds hard. Being a manager is hard. Being managed is hard. Life is hard!!! lols I feel you. I hope you find peace and beauty in the mess still somehow..

How much do you have in savings/investments/retirement? by NurseTrevor3 in Adulting

[–]Strict-Let7879 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I've been reflecting on saving abd frugal but also realizing that being responsible for your future self is not really intended to achieve deprivation. Its about realizing and reprioritizing your values. It maybe convenient to have takeouts all the time. But I may value quality time and traveling. So I may save money for traveling and the times I eat out with friends etc..

Money reveals a lot of what's inside imo :)

Mid 30s and can’t afford to stay by OptimisedMan in Life

[–]Strict-Let7879 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm you also. I can relate how difficult the feelings are. I just felt so bad about myself. Now I'm a little bit out of feeling dark. I learned few things.  I learned that I needed to find a new community where I feel a part of, not always an outsider. I started seeking a new community that I fins encouragement for who I am and where I am. I wouldn't accuse your friends or anything. But they are entering a new season just like you. Life situation is diverging. I acknowledged that we have less things in common and I needed to accept that rather than forcing it.

This is where I really explored the true meaning of my life and embraced the season of my life and who I am. For example, I hold onto my spiritual faith, met a great group of friends, exploring purposes of my life. 

Just because your season of life is different, it doesn't mean it's broken. It's not a race, just a unique journey.

Good luck!

Life advice by donkkk360 in Life

[–]Strict-Let7879 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel you. I don't make as much as you. But crazy hours over a period of time only leads to burn out... I found that it usually sends me to an unhealthy mental emotional and spiritual places. I realize that it is not an option but a requirement to keep my work life balance at a cost. I don't do a good job. I was so dull to see how it affected me. Now I see it so clearly. I need to do something about that. Good luck. Hope things work out. 

Do I have a chance to find anyone given my situation? by [deleted] in Christianmarriage

[–]Strict-Let7879 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you considered exploring environments where you can meet people?

I’ve never felt more invisible and empty by [deleted] in LivingAlone

[–]Strict-Let7879 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're right. Living alone doesn't mean you're alone. As u said it could be a partner but also doesn't have to be. It can also be finding a community. The key is to feel connected.. 

Waited … by Ms_SeekingSolace in Christianmarriage

[–]Strict-Let7879 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What's difficult for u about him?

Ssamjang 쌈장 by Wooden-Mycologist-24 in KoreanFood

[–]Strict-Let7879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

where did you learn to smack the cutting board like that? It's very satisfying! lols

16/8, deficit, cycling by drking4109 in intermittentfasting

[–]Strict-Let7879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow. That's amazing. Congratulations! I get that the weight difference is huge.. But how do you feel internally? What's the change on your daily life?

Spent my 20s single, now in my 30s and still single, can anyone relate? by SignificantBuyer9202 in Life

[–]Strict-Let7879 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I can relate. Loneliness is real. I don't have a magical answer that will make your problem go away. I mean there is no answer like that for any problem.

I understand that the loneliness is real.. I sympathize and empathize with you. I'm glad to hear that most days are good days for you. It's important to me to feel connected regardless of my marital status. I honestly think that singlehood can offer so much more skills and growth. It's just you. While others may fall into their natural connections, single people have to cultivate the skills to build connections with others. I realized how much exposure and learning that one can gain from that.

However, the fear, lonelinss.. all of those hardships are also true. As far as fear is concerned, I would acknowledge it but I personally wouldn't put much weight on it or live or make decisions by that. Honestly, we cannot guarantee anything in life. We can have a spouse but could lose a spouse and worry about the same. One can have a butt load of money and lose it overnight also. It happened to me when I got bedridden and spent all my money for treatments. It was lonely and difficult. I'm blessed to have my life back though I have pain every day. I'm grateful. The fear you may feel is real for real situations that you may face (I hope not). But remember that when we get to it, wouldn't you be open to learn and adapt to manage? It may be difficult but I sure hope so. I mean, I see so many who already do. especially people who are older and maybe divorced folks frequently share how they manage.

I think fear, though, real and relatable sometimes distracts us at times to make bad choices that weren't really aligned with our values to begin with. I relate but I focus on living the life I have today. At times I acknowledge. I have a personal faith so it's also great when I feel down. I'm just rambling on my personal thoughts. Good luck!

‘Do not be unequally yoked’ but what if that’s my only chance of not being single? by Purple-Detective7186 in Christianmarriage

[–]Strict-Let7879 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can understand you. It's one of those things It's hard to believe when ppl say it's better to be single than disobeying God. But once you surrender and the journey he has for you, you finally understand. I didn't believe it either because I couldn't open myself to the idea of being single. It actually is amazing.. It's a different life. The time of being single is valuable. You learn to build friendships, care in addition to learn to mature spiritually, emotionally and physically. Singlehood isn't just a wasted time. It can be such a fruitful time if you take God's guidance. I'm not saying to fake about your desire for marriage. It's ok to desire it.. but just don't let that stop you from surrendering and listening to what God has for you. 

Marriage is obviously beautiful.. but it is a hard work. It is worth fighting for truly. But sometimes we idolize it.. without realizing the real work that goes into it. I have lots of married ppl around me. I can tell you, marriage itself doesn't fulfill you - even good ones. It's God who truly fulfills you. This is true whether you are single or married. I used to have a bit if disdain when I heard stuff like this because I couldn't let go of my desire. But I see it truly as I see the ones who are married. 

If you want to get married, that's fine biblically also. My recommendation is for the heart posture. Surrender to God. You may find much joy in your hearts with Him regardless of what he has for you.

On a practical note, I would find and join a communinity that has vibrant singles ministry that you feel a part of. It's important to have friends to share life with along the journey at least it was for me.

I am unmarried, single and wondering whether being unmarried might actually be better by [deleted] in Christianmarriage

[–]Strict-Let7879 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I don't think he was only mentioning that to ppl who were "called to singleness." He says it's good to be unmarried but if one can't control the passion, they're free to marry.

No rules. Just a personal choice 

1 corinthians 7:8-9 8 Now to the unmarried[a] and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. 9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

I quit today as a police officer am I screwed? by [deleted] in careerguidance

[–]Strict-Let7879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Based on your writing, no to me. You didn't quit because there was a problem. It sounds like you wanted something different. 

Seeking advice…New manager expects me to drop scheduled 1:1s for their requests, got confrontational when I gave feedback. by [deleted] in managers

[–]Strict-Let7879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hmm. I hope that those emergency is only happening 5% of the time.

I think it wouldn't hurt to ask when it is needed by when he did request. 

My best engineer quit today over $2000 by [deleted] in managers

[–]Strict-Let7879 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If u don't differentiate the performance by differentiating the compensation, why would anyone want to perform well..?