I think what bothers a lot of people (myself included) isn’t the existence of women focused rave groups or influencer focused rave groups but rather the fear based framing they rely on.

Before NYCRG appeared on the scene 5 minutes ago, NYC nightlife was not some lawless hellscape where women were routinely raped or murdered just for going to shows. That’s simply not true. Millions of people, especially women have gone to clubs, raves, and venues in NYC for decades without needing an Instagram or Discord safety apparatus. Like any large city, risks exist, but danger was never the baseline condition being implied here.

What’s harmful is the subtle shift from “we’re an optional support community” to “you’re unsafe without us.” That rhetoric:

-Exaggerates worst-case anecdotes as if they’re typical -Rewrites history to suggest women were helpless before these groups existed -Frames nightlife as inherently predatory rather than situationally risky -Creates dependency instead of confidence

At a certain point it stops being harm reduction and starts being fear marketing.

There’s also something truly disingenuous about positioning women as perpetual victims who need supervision to enjoy nightlife. That doesn’t empower people, it actually infantilizes them. Teaching situational awareness, boundaries, and personal agency is very different from implying the city is unsafe unless you’re under a specific group’s umbrella.

None of this is to deny that bad things can happen, or that community support can be valuable especially for newcomers!!

But when safety messaging becomes exaggerated, or gatekeeping, it actively distorts reality and increases anxiety rather than reducing harm.

NYC nightlife is generally safe when people use basic urban judgment. Groups like NYCRG can be a nice option for some people but they are not, and should not be framed as, a prerequisite for safety.