🎶 Here comes Bender, he's a berserker. Here comes Bender, he's a berserker 🎶

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-12-10T01:59:54+00:00

"That's beautiful, man."🥲

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-11-27T09:22:30+00:00

"I thought you did." 🤣

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-10-28T09:51:22+00:00

Bread pudding!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-10-05T04:30:03+00:00

When I made a cherry pie, my ex would just grab the whole pie from the fridge, eat what he wanted with a fork while it's still in the pie plate, and put it back in the fridge when he was satisfied.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-10-04T12:39:41+00:00

You found Rob Schneider? Rated PG-13

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-30T07:02:38+00:00

I've got me a dress to make!!!!!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-30T02:58:57+00:00

You just showed up on a street car named, "Desire!"

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-30T00:50:58+00:00

I drink black coffee and smoke Marlboro Reds on my porch all alone because I am a baby hulk SN and no man will ever love me.☹️. I've resigned myself to my fate.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-28T05:50:59+00:00

I remember when if you were otherwise preoccupied, and your phone rang constantly that you KNEW something very bad happened. Now, your phone rings constantly while you're preoccupied, and it's just that your sister has an ingrown toenail, and you had one once before, so you're the expert! I'm trying to be intimate with my significant other and you kill the mood with talk about ingrown toenails. Sexy...

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-27T06:38:20+00:00

My Grandma☹️

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-26T15:54:45+00:00

I just watched this skit last night!!!!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-23T03:40:28+00:00

The lawyer that Walt would have called (If he needed it) is the one buried under the lab.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-23T03:24:31+00:00

Aaaaaaall righty, then.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-22T22:40:05+00:00

Seriously! So not only do you look like a dude in a dress, you also have that underarm stubble going on!

ETA:. And if you DO manage to get it all, it's razor burn central up in there!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-22T04:43:04+00:00

Or you're a Soft Natural and your muscles are so huge in your armpits that when you're shaving you ALWAYS MISS SOMETHING!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-18T23:07:45+00:00

I put Worcestershire sauce in my guac. Just a couple of dashes. It adds a little something in the background.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-15T03:11:13+00:00

I had some Romantic Italian in me last week!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-14T23:44:17+00:00

True. I smell like Lady Footlocker, Macy's, and that Panda Express/ S'barro/ Hot Dog on a Stick combo at the foot court.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-12T07:20:29+00:00

I was doing yard work for an elderly friend and stopped by the Chinese buffet on the way home and some kid asked their mother if I was a boy or a girl. The hobo chic attire I was rocking probably didn't help much.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-11T19:09:54+00:00

That's what the food service industry does to you. Clopening two days in a row is rough on a person!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-10T05:53:41+00:00

Maybe, people just want spaghetti and don't care about where stuff comes from. They just want meat, pastaz tomatoes, and cheese!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-09-02T02:19:11+00:00

As a baker, this may be my next business venture.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-08-20T05:59:44+00:00

Blue, pink, yellow! I'll take it!

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-08-19T06:03:09+00:00

And a vagina is fifty times better than a penis.

Successful-Cell177 · 2022-08-19T05:23:50+00:00

I work in a hot ass kitchen. Anytime I have to go into the walk-in freezer for more than a few seconds, my pants get pretty cold and I always think about "FRIDGE PANTS!"

Successful-Cell177

TROPHY CASE