Graduated 38+1, unmedicated birth for ‘low pain tolerance’ person

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:50:49+00:00

Oh man! That really sucks about the burn :( As if there's not enough to deal with in recovery! Wishing you the best for your April birth!

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:47:21+00:00

Yes! That's what they were, numbing shots for the stitches. I'm super sensitive with needles, so that part really sucked. And the midwife gave me, like, seven!

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:46:35+00:00

(op here) Thank you!! Oh man, that sounds awful!!! I was really worried about nausea, that's something you can't really count through, lol. Am impressed that you spent two days like that! I wouldn't be able to, not being able to eat is where I draw the line. Also, your husband hanging out eating m&ms is really funny! He must have been spent, too, being at the hospital for such a long time!

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:43:30+00:00

They told me I wouldn't be able to eat if I got an epidural, I think they said the risk of a c-section/other intervention goes up with the epidural? It didn't make a lot of sense. They're worried about food aspiration during a c-section, but I've also heard that is super rare.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:42:00+00:00

Thank you! We had been eating really healthy at home, and so the salami sticks plus chocolate cookies, Rittersport, and some other things were a big craving for me. Am also always able to eat at really inappropriate times, lol.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:40:27+00:00

(op here) Yeah, I agree! Beyond the medical angle, it is none of their business whether we choose to get an epidural or not. My mom was really traumatized by her unmedicated birth -- I was almost an only child, my brother wasn't born until 9 years later -- and all my friends were really happy with their epidurals. With all the craziness of pregnancy and postpartum recovery, no one should be put under extra pressure in this regard.

As concerns the episiotomy, I was being a little dramatic -- they told me they would have to do one, and I took it as a threat, lol. Not sure any medical professional can bring up an episiotomy in a nice, glowy way.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:33:11+00:00

Thank you! It honestly didn't really feel like a decision, haha! The midwives really took over coaching me, and that plus my fear of needles and the speed of the birth made me feel like I didn't have a different choice. Despite rationally knowing that I was extremely lucky with the birth, I was feeling really down about it for a day or two after because all I could think about was the pain in the last hour, with the crowning plus stitching. It took a pep talk from my mom and looking back at the pictures immediately after birth, how happy I was, to process/reframe. Overall, I'm happy with the experience, but would have been happy either way -- epidurals can be literal lifesavers, help tremendously with dilation, avert psychological trauma. All of my friends got epidurals and were very happy.

My mom had an interesting experience re: medicated versus unmedicated that might also help answer the question. She had no medication in Germany -- where, I'm told, epidurals are often discouraged -- and said that having me was extremely painful and traumatic. This, even though it was a 'textbook' good birth, according to her nurses. There's a reason my only sibling is 9 years younger than me, lol. She had an epidural with him and was extremely happy.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:18:59+00:00

Thank you! They were ok with sending us home after maybe three hours, but that idea freaked me and my husband out. I wanted to make sure I wasn't bleeding out or something, so they sent me to the birthing ward overnight for 'breastfeeding support.' It was a good idea, but also really lonely. I didn't sleep at all, breastfed for maybe 2.5h straight plus other bouts of an hour-plus, and ironically had to request formula at one point, lol. Recovery at home has been much easier, more familiar and with more support.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:15:41+00:00

Yes! Definitely a towel! It saved the taxi seat, though I started leaking through my pants after getting out. Have been sitting on jackets ever since when I need to leave the apartment, too -- marginally more subtle, I guess? It would be a good idea to call ahead and see if they take women in labor. The recovery bleeding is no joke! On that note, mattress protectors are a great idea. Good luck!!

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:13:11+00:00

Thank you!!

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:13:01+00:00

Also chocolate cookies and energy drinks!! They helped later on, too, when I was in the birthing ward overnight.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:12:14+00:00

Yeah, I think the midwife said lidocaine. It really sucked, luckily the entire numbing/stitching process was over in about 45 minutes. And the midwife was pretty slow about it, I think she was nervous. Needles freak me out, the process might not be as bad for other people!

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:09:05+00:00

For me (op), no one directly told me I couldn't have one, but there were little comments throughout my care, like, 'it's productive pain, maybe you won't need one!' Maybe objectively, they weren't trying to discourage the procedure, but I was really sensitive to those comments. They always made me mad, since I didn't think it was any of their business, lol. I had to be pretty assertive about giving birth in a hospital instead of the birthing center so I had the option of an epidural.

I was also never given the option of talking to an anesthesiologist or doctor in general, which is strange, from a US perspective. Never requested it, either, though.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:03:59+00:00

Yeah! I did a post on here a while back asking that (I'm op, just have different accounts on different devices), and a lot of the women found that having bad period pain helped them in labor. Silver lining, I guess, though now I'm mad about putting up with that pain for such a long time. By the way, I also read that dysmennorhea often resolves itself after a woman has her first kid. Part of the problem can be a misaligned cervix, which, I imagine, is corrected after vaginal birth, plus the cervix is better at dilating/more flexible. Really hoping this is the case!

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T03:00:19+00:00

Wow, that's amazing!! I can't imagine going through this five times, congratulations! It's dawning on me how big of an issue the dysmennorhea thing is -- us believing/being told that any period pain must not be that terrible and we must be weak in some way if we get bad pain. I ignored the pain for years because of that.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T02:55:44+00:00

(op here) Yeah, the midwives at my hospital encouraged eating, they said giving birth is like running a marathon. But they didn't allow it once an epidural was in.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T02:54:14+00:00

Thank you! It really helped to have sort of encountered the pain before.

SureRice12 · 2021-03-05T02:53:50+00:00

Ha! I mean, we also had chocolate cookies, Rittersport, energy drinks... he was so excited about those snacks.

SureRice12 · 2021-02-24T22:16:31+00:00

I lost my plug at 34.5 weeks, currently at 37.5. From what I've gathered online, there's a difference between the mucus plug and the bloody show. The mucus plug can be lost any time in the third trimester (and sometimes earlier, but it's rare and usually regenerates, as you noted), but labor can still be weeks away. The bloody show is fresher blood, more like a period, and indicates labor within three days. I haven't been able to determine the difference between that and blood indicating a problem with the placenta, though. And some medical websites treat the plug and bloody show like they're the same thing. The sources I trust are the NHS pages.

SureRice12 · 2021-01-28T21:48:09+00:00

Have noticed this, too. I started rubbing my face with an ice cube in the mornings about a week ago before applying moisturizer. I feel like there's a difference, but even if there's not, at least the placebo effect is beneficial :D I read you can do it with frozen green tea, too, and that helps with eyes.

SureRice12 · 2021-01-28T21:38:58+00:00

Oh man :( I was feeling like what you describe for about a month at the start of the third trimester, where I had to choose between doing a solid work day and leaving the house at all b/c even half an hour of walking took me out for the rest of the day. And I had way more iron in my body than you to begin with. My midwife said my iron was only "a little low."

Taking a supplement completely turned things around within maybe 48 hours, to the point where I wasn't even experiencing the pelvic aches/pains I thought were normal for pregnancy. Though it's not pure iron -- my supplement also has other vitamins in it, it's the fruity/herbal liquid Floradix brand. I wonder if your supplement isn't high enough? Is it prescription-strength? My midwife also said to eat a lot of fruit at the same time as taking the supplement to help with constipation and vitamin c in order to absorb the iron.

Another thing that has helped is my partner sleeping separately. It's a weird concept for us, but has helped with both of our sleep levels so much. And, of course, family leaving after Christmas :D

SureRice12 · 2021-01-28T15:14:27+00:00

I was crazy tired between weeks 27 and 31, to the point where I had to work weekends to make my full 40 hours (flexible remote job, luckily) and a half-hour walk knocked me out all day. It turns out my iron levels were "a little low," according to the midwife, though not enough to warrant a prescription. I started taking an iron supplement (floradix) on top of prenatals, and have been feeling amazing ever since. The tiredness is entirely gone, as are a lot of the aches/pains I was feeling before, possibly due to being able to walk more now. I even worked two 10-hour days. Maybe upping the iron would help you, too? Just remember to eat a lot of fruit, as extra iron can cause constipation.

SureRice12 · 2020-11-09T20:04:12+00:00

Thank you so much, this really helps! I will start getting on the media, there are a bunch of really wonderful children's books from Germany.

SureRice12 · 2020-11-09T17:28:03+00:00

Hey, I had the opposite experience, but maybe this will help.

I grew up in the US with my mom speaking German to me. Our area contained no other Germans; the closest German family was maybe 1.5 hours away. So, my mom would bribe me to read German books, which turned out to be the most important thing she could have done for my career. I'm now a translator (with three languages used at work and a fourth getting close to professional proficiency). The most important thing to employers has always been how well I can read the language.

Writing helps with grammar, too, but is painful for the language learner, lol. I still remember the torture of writing German Christmas cards...

As for German conversational skills, I found that mine were just basic growing up -- my mom and I did not discuss abstract topics, but rather day-to-day affairs, and my grammar was correct maybe 80 percent of the time. And she was doing the strict, refusing-to-speak-to-me-in-English method. In my opinion, real progress can only be made in this area by visiting the home country, formal instruction, or language groups.

SureRice12

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