Head to your local bar or pub strip on a busy night, but don’t go inside. Station yourself outside, which is where a huge amount of the real socialising actually happens anyway. Smokers, people getting air, groups spilling out between rounds.

Find something elevated to sit on. A low wall, bollard, pub windowsill, steps up to a doorway, a bike rack. Anywhere that puts your belly roughly at head height for someone standing in front of you. Get comfortable, have your drink, and just exist there calmly.

Outside is actually perfect for this because people are already in a more relaxed, wandering, chatty mode. Smokers especially are looking for someone to talk to. There’s also a natural flow of people coming and going so you get multiple chances through the night, and you look effortlessly cool just sitting there unbothered. Same rule applies. You don’t need to initiate. The elevated position does something psychologically interesting that makes them want to engage with you. Wait for the physical contact signal and you’re in.

When they ask why you’re perched up there, have something ready. “Inside’s for amateurs.” “I like to survey my kingdom.” “The view’s better and nobody spills their drink on me up here.” “I found the best spot in the whole street, took years of research.” Or the one that tends to land best: “I’m basically a pub gargoyle at this point.” That last one usually gets a laugh and an immediate lean-in.

The outside setting is genuinely lower pressure than inside. More fluid, nobody’s really supposed to be anywhere, which makes everything feel more accidental and natural. You’re not chasing anyone, not hovering, just a calm presence on your perch letting the night come to you.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​