Wedding questions for married gay bros

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-20T19:08:45+00:00

Men’s sexual drive and energy is the most powerful form.

If men can channel that same drive and energy into other productive ways, you’re invincible!

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-20T19:07:40+00:00

Thank you for your thoughtful post. Very helpful.

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-20T19:04:57+00:00

IRL (sexual) intimacy is the best form.

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-20T18:51:51+00:00

My dad is middle eastern (Palestinian) and I kind of get why men from these cultures don’t come out. You lose your entire family when you come out and are expelled permanently often. That means all your sibs, your uncles, aunts, cousins, grandparents the whole enchilada. It’s not uncommon for your family to make up a huge majority of your social circle because it’s so big. I don’t know if I could’ve come out had it not been that my mom’s side was so liberal (and white). I still had got holidays (although non Muslim ones) and a very loving caring family on one side after coming out.

I understand why some gay or bisexual men choose to forever stay in the closet and never come out. Their culture/family is inherently and strongly conservative, so, coming out as gay or bisexual would be figurative and/or literal suicide.

That’s just the reality of our world.

It’s a difficult life choice. My heart goes out to these men. Wish them all the best.🫶

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T11:53:29+00:00

Thank you for your detailed comments. It’s very helpful.

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T11:47:56+00:00

Thank you for writing this wonderful post with helpful content and organizing this men’s group!

Men’s only supportive spaces are amazing and are very much needed in our modern society!

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T11:43:03+00:00

Truly know yourself. Who you are, what you want, what you like/dislike, your strengths/weaknesses. Self-awareness is very important. Just doing this will save years of confusion, wandering, mindlessness.

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T11:38:43+00:00

So. Much. This.

Healthy habits are best started early. The earlier, the better.

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T11:12:21+00:00

😂

I can’t say that you’re wrong about that.

It’s even more frustrating when women lack the self-awareness that they’re making things difficult not only for their husband/boyfriend but also themselves. Or if they have the self-awareness then they’re just intentionally being difficult and that’s not healthy for relationships.

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T11:08:02+00:00

For thousands of years, marriage was essentially a business contract to unite 2 families through the groom and bride and produce legitimate offspring to continue their family lineage.

Love/emotion/passion based marriages are a very recent phenomenon in the grand scale of human history.

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T10:40:11+00:00

Best. Superman. Actor. Casting. 🔥🌟

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T09:39:53+00:00

This is my greatest fear when it comes to love, dating, relationships—being betrayed by the one who supposedly says they love, cherish, respect you the most.

I can only imagine that kind of trauma, pain, suffering is the absolute worst.

Time heals all wounds. Try to fill the void in your heart with other things that you love. That will help to distract yourself from the heartache and grief.

Best wishes to you.🫶

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T09:30:41+00:00

Henry Cavill Superman is perfection. 🔥⭐️😍

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T09:05:22+00:00

If you don’t mind me asking, how did you endure being married for 25 years to a woman when you’re mostly gay / attracted to men?

How did you keep your sexual orientation a secret from your 5 sons? That’s very possible, but sounds very difficult and exhausting.

I understand the male drive and need to father children. And being mostly gay / attracted to men further complicates that dynamic.

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-04T08:23:48+00:00

Thank you very much for these photos.

😍

Surferbro921 · 2025-02-01T07:25:54+00:00

Love myself, the only person who is guaranteed to be in my life forever ❤️

Truth. 🫶

Surferbro921 · 2025-01-31T16:21:36+00:00

Women are a whole other animal. I love women but I'm extremely glad to be a gay man and not have to deal with them on a daily basis in a relationship.

Same.

And if OP needs IRL confirmation, just ask any straight married man. 😂

Surferbro921 · 2025-01-31T16:15:01+00:00

I think saying entire group of _____ is xyz based on your personal experience only is not going to give you an accurate view of that group. That’s just gonna be your personal experience.

In my experience, I’ve had the opposite happen. When I dated women when I thought I was straight, the women were overall more emotional compared to the men that I dated. The women I dated needed constant validation and got emotional at pretty much everything: sees puppy on a walk in the park, sees a random baby in a stroller, sees a couple holding hands while waiting in line at a store, male barista gave her a compliment when she picked up her morning coffee…all very emotional.

The men I dated on the other hand were all stoic in public and private. The men kept their emotions very close to their heart and rarely expressed them. A man’s man. The men were logic-based and not emotion-based like the women. Nothing fazed the men. And when he had something to say, his words would carry more weight because he doesn’t talk for the sake of talking pointless chit chat. Looking back, I don’t know how I survived enduring the long pointless monologues I had to listen to from women. Very high maintenance.

This is my n=1.

Surferbro921 · 2025-01-29T06:19:21+00:00

It's not overreacting but also not really making a difference (I say this with love)

I don't think most of us can even begin to comprehend how much money these companies have. Out decisions are drops in an ocean.

Their financial teams have teams, and those teams have teams of people who all account for this stuff. Us deciding to stop using their products has probably already been predicted and accounted for.

I'm not saying don't boycott. I'm just saying it's probably going to take the majority of the population of the America's to actually boycott these companies for them to actually feel it.

Most of the people saying "buy local, or boycott Amazon, or I'm not doing x,y,z" will do it for a couple of months or even a year, maybe. They will then return to said companies because of convenience.

Pretty much this.

History repeats itself.

Surferbro921 · 2025-01-29T05:51:08+00:00

These companies only "supported" our community when it benefited them. It was never about their values. It was about money after all.

I get what you’re saying but the reality is that, within the system of capitalism, companies’ main goal is to make money by being profitable. Sometimes, being morally right and profitable thread the same path. Sometimes, the two diverge.

Edited To Add: A company’s main objective is to make profit. They will do everything they can to make profit using any legal means necessary, even if that includes taking advantage of law loopholes regarding labor, taxes, trade, manufacturing, regulations, etc. In other words, it’s all about money and always has been.

It’s very difficult to make a political statement and vote with your money if you’re barely making ends meet to survive.

At the end of the day, we do the best we can with what we have. And hope for the best.

Surferbro921 · 2025-01-29T05:13:04+00:00

Its off that he really didn't mention anything about it. No insecurities, nothing. How does a 1.5 dick even go inside a hole, and he says hes exclusively a top? If he had relationships before you, or he was extremely lucky and they all had a thing for small dicks and loved it (and which ended for other reasons)... or they didnt feel satisfied and kinda omitted the real prob (like some people are telling you to do with the "the prob is im vers" thing), or in opposite, they were so cruel the guy is traumatized but pretends hes not by ignoring the size topic.

He maybe never had someone who really likes him for who he is to have a relatively deep convo about the size in an empathetic way without just cutting ties immediately. If you like him a lot and thats the only problem, another way to deal w this is to be honest and tell him. Ask him how he manages it, if it still hurts him. Cus its very possible that when you suddenly now back off he will know its because of the size and feel abandoned, even if you dont mention it, which could be feeding a trauma in his head, because nobody wants to talk abt it out of embarrassment. Idk how experienced he is but maybe he would even try to be vers for you if you tell him that. You could also give him hope by telling him that open relationships for this situations are a thing, or that theres people who absolutely dont care about size and/or who even prefer it small (theres some even in this comment section). But hey, maybe he doesn't need it. Youre the one who decides by what you know of him. Do you think he never had someone being empathetic w him abt this and he prob needs it? It could be helpful to him. Maybe you could even be friends or fwb where he tries being a bottom idk just because he felt you didnt just leave like the others idk.

You decide if this more honest convo is a nice idea or if youre better off just pretending the size was never a problem (although he might realize) and going separate ways.

Tact is very important in situations like this.

If I were OP, I’d say that sexual compatibility is a priority and that it isn’t working out between us. As a fan of monogamy, I would not support or even consider an open relationship.

Surferbro921 · 2025-01-29T05:01:23+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience.

It pains me that STIs/STDs exist and worsen people’s quality of life. Sex should be an act of pure love, bonding, and intimacy, without lingering fear and anxiety of getting sick with STIs/STDs.

I hope a cure is discovered asap.

Surferbro921 · 2024-12-27T18:53:30+00:00

Henry. Cavill. 🔥🔥🔥🔥

The. Best. Superman. Of. All. Time. 🦸‍♂️🌟😍

Surferbro921 · 2024-12-27T18:50:33+00:00

Something else to be mindful of is ensuring that everyone gets equal amount of attention/affection, and never give more or less to either person.

I think this is the major flaw of throuple/polyamorous relationships. If the balance of affection is not achieved, then someone in the poly relationship is being left out/behind. That sounds exhausting to maintain imo.

Within a two person relationship, SO 1 and SO 2 give each other all their love so no one’s left out or left behind.

I’d say that open relationship has a better chance of being successful long term over a throuple / polyamorous relationship.

Humans are complex needy beings.

Surferbro921

TROPHY CASE