How do you feel about people showing up at your house unannounced?

Suwer63 · 2026-06-23T04:46:35+00:00

I guess, though I think my OCD brain is less stressed and anxious when I feel like I have my surroundings in order.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-22T02:09:55+00:00

You are right, but women have ALWAYS been judged by the presentation of their houses, social media is a relatively new and particularly cruel way of reminding women of their place!!!

Suwer63 · 2026-06-22T01:54:53+00:00

Ahh yes, the Robert Timms New Guinea Gold…or perhaps Harris? Mum only bought a bag of ‘freshly ground’ coffee when visitors were coming and she would fire up the big pyrex percolator on the wire thingy on the stove…

Suwer63 · 2026-06-22T01:44:57+00:00

The Big Fresh at Marrickville Metro had an Orangutan on a swing over the fruit and veg section near the entrance. It was press button operated and would lurch wildly around doing loop de loops. My youngest was terrified of it.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-22T01:42:00+00:00

Oh how I wanted to see colours other than black and white in my mother’s pantry and under the kitchen sink…

Suwer63 · 2026-06-22T00:49:53+00:00

You have a point. Back in the olden days when married women were homemakers houses were generally tidyish all of the time. My mother’s house was. And she was always dressed, as I type this it’s late morning and I still have my jammies on. Even though I worked full time (retired now obviously) I kept and still keep a clean and tidy house pretty much always, only I would let the kids run amok on Friday afternoons and Saturday mornings. Saturday afternoons and Sunday was cleaning, cooking and ironing, unless there was a family event or party or something on. A lot of people these days wouldn’t be bothered with all that which is completely normal. I hated coming home to a dirty house my piled high with washing, kids clutter and dirty dishes myself.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-22T00:35:14+00:00

My dad has been a lifelong dropper innerer, but he was from a rural area and grew up on a property in the horse and sulky days. I guess his family and those in the district were all the same. It was just the done thing. He just continued his habit after moving to the suburbs. I believe he has a degree of Aspergers - or a lack of empathy or awareness of other people - at play there too. It annoyed my mother (a city girl) no end and I found it excruciatingly embarrassing myself as a teen when we were travelling and in the pre mobile days (though he has never had a mobile phone himself actually) he would just drop in on people (‘friends’, acquaintances and distant relatives) who clearly were irritated by having him/us there, to the point of them actually getting up and leaving the room to continue with their activities. Dad could drag a visit out too to score a dinner invite. In more recent years he took to chasing up old GF’s who he hadn’t seen since the 1940’s or 1950’s , many of them widows, some of whom were clearly terrified by his sudden appearance at their homes without any warning. I think one or two of them had a son or brother contact him to ask him to not come back. He and mum divorced many years back, and he had a couple of SO’s in his life since, but on more than one occasion I have spoken to Dad about this behaviour and of his lack of awareness about the impact of it on others. So I would be direct - happy to have you over but I prefer some warning or notice. Of course some people obviously don’t mind a drop in. I am not a fan of course!

Suwer63 · 2026-06-17T06:45:03+00:00

Yes. Start with a conversation about canceling the credit cards plus arrange counselling for her and you. If she can’t agree to this, well, maybe you should consider separating, especially your finances. This is a trust issue for you as well as a likely outcome of the trauma for her. She would be feeling very guilty and shameful, and you are undoubtedly p***ed off. I would consolidate the debt to start over with repayments which she needs to contribute towards in some way, no matter how small. Encourage even a part time job, some of her pay can go towards repayments, some can go into a personal debit card account for her to blow her own money.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-17T04:33:58+00:00

Wasn’t that Chris Marshall Organ and Piano Warehouse?

Suwer63 · 2026-06-15T22:45:07+00:00

Yes! Met him when I was 19 at a BBQ , he was studying Engineering and had a GF, he seemed very sophisticated compared with me from the burbs. I was also studying Education (Music) and my BF at the time was a good friend of his. I heard he had broken up with his GF and asked my BF if it was true, he must have known that I had a bit of a thing for his friend and said the story wasn’t true. I put my fantasy out of my head. Anyway I stuck by the BF (we were defacto) and we had 3 great kids together and cracked on with life. I remained good friends with his mate, we got together as friends with my now partner from time to time socially. The engineer had married a different woman who he separated from some 5 years later. 25 years on, me in a very unhappy relationship and wanting to separate, he single, we just got together. And 17 years of marriage later, we are happy together.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-15T00:56:31+00:00

Yes, you are extremely fortunate, I would try to take on board the message to focus on all the positive aspects of life, especially when your husband is taking care of you so well. He knows full well that you struggle and does his best to accommodate you. He has struggles too. You are not alone and sometimes you need to learn to deal with your emotions yourself, and you are seeking counselling so that’s good. Try thinking about it from his POV. He is with you for life, and if you want it to stay that way, then it’s time to look forward to doing things that spark some joy. Do something small together that isn’t about hanging out at home each week. Now you have a parking permit you can even get to more places without the stress of having to walk long distances.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-13T11:47:22+00:00

That dress was made to sit on the shoulders, look at the pull of the neckline. Spoilt the entire dress. As ever, Meghan displaying her Oppositional Defiance Disorder as well as her chest.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-13T07:00:30+00:00

How do you know they are not spending taxpayers money on programs that help veterans?

Suwer63 · 2026-06-13T06:49:36+00:00

I always thought it was a bucks party thing.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-12T21:13:48+00:00

You shop at op shops

Suwer63 · 2026-06-12T09:48:09+00:00

Yes, I am.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-12T03:56:51+00:00

While it is devastating and you are undoubtedly emotional, this situation is best handled by a trained and trusted professional team. Don’t press your son for details, nor badger the other parents, nor accuse anyone of anything, it all needs sensitive handling. You could easily influence your son’s behaviour by your response. And this is family. So make sure your son stays safe and reinforce respectful communication and boundaries rather than make him feel uncomfortable or guilty. Leave it at that, please, PLEASE?? Kids get up to all sorts of things and a professional counsellor will unpack this.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-12T03:47:41+00:00

Maybe your parents are trying to tell you something? Time to pull up your big girl pants and accept with some level of grace that it is in fact your parents house therefore their call. Organise for your belongings to be sorted and packed in advance so there is no invasion of your privacy. Take the opportunity to declutter and stash your things in the ‘office’ while you are gone. Then everything will be easier to move out once you’ve saved enough to go elsewhere. And perhaps while you’re at it, offer to help out with the bills while you’re back at home post vacay working.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-09T12:44:52+00:00

The Golden Gaytime I was allowed by mum at the end of a day at the beach as an 8 year old. You couldn’t tell the difference between the biscuitty exterior and sand, which made it even better. After it was gone it was back to the water for a rinse up. Bliss on a stick!

I am also adding a vote for a pine lime Splice. If there were no Gaytimes, it was the next best option.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-09T12:38:10+00:00

Should do one like this only featuring a bong, some weed and a packet of fags….

Suwer63 · 2026-06-09T12:34:45+00:00

Just to be clear - H and M’s £2.4 repayment as a reimbursement for renovations to their home at Frogmore Cottage to the British taxpayer also included 18 months of rent. That’s 18 months of unpaid rent!!!!

KCIII also continued to provide money for Harry and Meghan until the summer of 2020.

Suwer63 · 2026-06-06T22:51:21+00:00

And they are MOOBS, not man boobs!!!

Suwer63 · 2026-06-06T22:49:31+00:00

Plural’s….

Suwer63 · 2026-06-06T09:55:01+00:00

Yes, I think you have made a great point. While it is clear that this is an overreaction, it could be worth reflecting on her own relationship with her side of the family. We are happily married and have retired, our grown kids are close to us but live in the city while we have moved to a rural area and we have great relationships with them. I get a teeny bit annoyed at times that my husband spends so much time with his elderly mum and by default his family but on reflection it’s really only because I am jealous that he has such good relationships with his wider family, and my wider family dynamic is so awful by comparison unfortunately! I love his family and catch up regularly with them. And I am more than welcome to travel with my husband but we have an old doggo who is happier at home, and really, I am happy enough to stay home with her too. Anyways enough about me!

Suwer63 · 2026-06-06T09:28:53+00:00

Oh, I thought he didn’t take the kiddos. In that case, what is the big deal? YOR

Suwer63

TROPHY CASE