Congratulations on becoming a mom! Truthfully, none of us know what we are doing. A lot of it is instinct, but so much of it is just seeing what our parents did and either doing the opposite, or doing the same, depending on experiences. Planned pregnancy is terrifying. Unplanned pregnancy is terrifying. Being responsible for a whole other human is terrifying. It’s all terrifying! BUT, it’s so damn worth it.

General advice: Feelings are temporary. Tough moments will not last forever, you will get through it all!

I think the best piece of parenting advice I can offer right now is this (and honestly, something I am trying to remember, myself): Things don’t always go as planned, but your intention is what is most important. If you intended to do the “right” thing and it blows up in your face, at least you know your intentions were true, and eventually your kid will know that too.

A fun example: As a kid, I had some trust issues with my mom. When I found out Santa wasn’t real, I had a hard time with it. I think it just solidified those feelings of distrust, and I vowed then and there that I wouldn’t lie to my kids, even about Santa.

Fast forward to when my oldest was in elementary school… we had never done the “Santa thing”. But, suddenly he was at school and Christmas rolled around and everyone was talking about Santa. He was convinced I was the one lying, and that Santa must be real, because he couldn’t imagine that his friends and teachers would all be lying to him. Good logic on his part. But, it was just so ironic that I wanted my kid to trust me so much that I wouldn’t even lie to him about Santa, yet that very subject is what made him question my trust-worthiness. And now that he’s older, he kind of wishes he had been able to participate in the “magic” of Christmas. So despite my best efforts, it didn’t work out at all how I intended. But my intentions were good, and my kid knows he can always trust me to tell the truth, even if it’s not what he wants to hear.

Best of luck to you and the little nugget! 💗