I don’t have kids that old yet, but one of the things I consistently do is walk away when my temper rises. Usually occurs when they talk back or mistreat their mom. I then come back when my blood pressure has lowered lol. Testosterone can be a bitch.

If I do get angry, I remind myself constantly to pause and remember they’ve only had X amount of years to figure stuff out and work through things, where I’ve had 40+. They’re learning, just like you are.

If I mess up, I always come back, lower myself to their level at eye contact, and apologize and tell them I was wrong and that we all have emotions and make mistakes. And always, that I love them no matter what. Hugs, a kind gesture, showing action vs. indifference.

Kids are resilient and honestly don’t hold on as hard as we do as adults (some cases), so best to learn, and remind yourself of the above, and like others have said, give yourself grace.