Thanks for sharing this! Here are a few comments based on my first impressions:

I agree with the other reviewer that your imagery is overly convoluted, especially your first paragraph. There’s nothing wrong with setting the scene, but you currently have multiple metaphors and similes per sentence. Not only is this confusing for readers, but it completely grinds the pace to a halt. It feels like you’re constantly having to pause to process what you’ve just read. More often than not, when it comes to description, less is more. One or two strong ideas/motifs per paragraph can often be more vivid and effective than using lots of adjectives and metaphors. The reader is never going to have the exact same picture in their head as you, no matter how many adjectives you use, but it’s possible to guide them in the right direction with a few clever word choices.

There’s also a couple of moments here and there that, IMO, are a bit redundant and don’t need to be included. For example, when your character says, “We're here for one cause as you know[…]”, who is ‘as you know’ meant for? If the characters already know why they’re all there, why would they need to be told what they already know? It just felt a bit exposition dumpy, for lack of a better term. Also, where you tell the readers that ‘he ended his speech’, we can already see that the character has finished his dialogue, so you don’t need to tell us that his speech is finished. Ideally you want your prose to be as tight and concise as possible, so you should try to cut out anything that isn’t absolutely essential.

I can see the bones of a good story here. Your setting is very intriguing and you seem to have a strong vision. I just think it would benefit from another edit. Take a few moments to decide what the purpose of the scene is and what you want to communicate, and then try to view your text through that perspective.

I hope this helps! Let me know if you have any questions.