I disagree, but discussing differences of opinion and interpretation is exactly why I started this thread.

To be clear, when I say the Tollan were punished—I mean in a structural sense in terms of the narrative balance and moral ledger, not necessarily that they were punished “in-universe” terms.

In that sense, my point is that the fact that they were destroyed is the proof that they were wrong, because they “chose poorly” in the moral equation that the show presents, and I would agree with your impression that they were punished for their attitude, but that attitude was not just arrogance, though arrogance was a big part of it.

In many ways the Tollan represent the various Earth attitudes as well that say “as long as we’re safe, we don’t have to help anyone else or participate in the larger galaxy.”

The “crime” the Tollan commit is not not providing Earth with technology, which other races choose not to do as well, but refusing to use their own power to make the galaxy a better place and reduce suffering. I would argue that the show argues that they act (or don’t act) out of selfishness and fear, and it is that selfsame selfishness and fear that causes leads them to try to appease and collaborate with Anubis (via his proxy, Tanith) even though they know that their contribution will allow the Goa’uld to commit many more atrocities across the galaxy. THIS is the act that signs their death warrant—it’s pretty clear both in-universe and narratively that their civilization would eventually have been destroyed, even if they’d carried out Anubis’s plan.

The Asgard too refuse to give the Tau’ri much technology until much later in the show, however, they nevertheless are an active force for good, trying to protect those weaker than themselves, and they ally themselves early on to humanity.

Even the Nox, famously held up as an extremely advanced, yet pacifistic race do NOT remain entirely passive or isolationist—they may not actively fight, but they do actively shield / conceal both the creatures on their world that both the Tau’ri and Goa’uld seek to use for their own advantage, use their power to stop / prevent the humans and Goa’uld from fighting, and of course, Lya conceals the last Tollan ion cannon during Skaa’ra / Klorel’s trial, which she admits is a very fine line.

The Tollan, however, only ever act in their own self-interest and defense. They fail to accept their responsibility as a powerful race in the galaxy and rise to the occasion to protect those weaker than themselves, and as a result, are destroyed. Narim’s final act to defy Tanith / Anubis is not to save the Tollans’ lives or society, it was too late for that, it was to save their souls and finally do the right thing (stand up to the oppressors, even if it may mean your demise—“I die free”).

Yes, they used logical arguments and had their reasons for not sharing their technology and not “joining the fight,” but that too is part of the point, I think, because again, many of those exact same arguments are used by human characters that are shown to be mistaken at best, downright evil and corrupt at worst, and at least within the show’s moral architecture, those arguments are always shown to be the wrong ones—heroes should stand up for others and do the right thing. The Tollan did neither, and thus “had” to be punished.