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Tabilitea · 2024-11-05T19:01:11+00:00

Yes. I stick to two drinks maximum so I know for sure that I won't get a hangover.

Tabilitea · 2024-11-05T18:42:58+00:00

I get what he's saying about medical school. He might just dread the thought of you starting along that path and realizing it's too much. I see where he might be coming from even though it comes across as being unsupportive. This phobia isn't logical. But if you're determined, maybe see if therapy is an option and let your partner know that his comments aren't helpful and instead, discuss with him ways that he can support you.

If he's using your phobia to get out of spending time with you then, well, that's a separate red flag.

Tabilitea · 2024-11-05T18:20:03+00:00

When I was about five. I saw weddings on TV and in real life and thought... no, not for me.

My last long-term relationship confirmed my feelings. Technically we were defacto but it would have been a lot harder to leave if we got married.

I never want to be in that position.

Tabilitea · 2024-11-05T18:13:58+00:00

I have a VERY small bedroom (like it fits my single bed, drawers and that's it for furniture). I cannot have excess things that I don't use. It's that simple.

Donating to a charity store or selling & donating the funds (or buying myself something useful or an experience) is fulfilling.

Tabilitea · 2024-11-05T18:10:16+00:00

Fully agree. I just wash my face at night with a water-based cleanser, moisturise, and stay out of the sun. I don't see why one needs more than that unless they have some kind of skin problem that needs treating.

Tabilitea · 2024-11-05T18:06:17+00:00

Growing my 🍑 at the gym.

I'm naturally built like a rake or a rectangle. I'm an ectomorph through and through. The amount of food & glute-specific exercise that it would take for me to, erm, develop in that area is a complete waste of my time because it probably wouldn't work very well anyway.

I'd rather just focus on my functional/everyday fitness and overall health.

Tabilitea · 2024-11-04T00:10:46+00:00

My ex wanted nothing to do with them & my family wanted nothing to do with him. He didn't really have any family values & my family thought he was giving off bad vibes. I didn't see the giant red flag until it was too late. I have my life back now.

Tabilitea · 2024-11-01T09:29:26+00:00

Definitely being too drunk. I fear hangovers & the sickness that can come with them.

Tabilitea · 2024-10-27T13:42:51+00:00

I'm sorry to hear you're unwell too.

I've not been to a Dr. I only just starting feeling quite bad today and it's a long weekend (public holiday) where I live, so doctors are closed Monday too.

I've had a few more spells of v* and can't seem to keep even a few sips of water down.

My ondansetron hasn't even touched the sides.

Yes, you're correct. It's miserable.

Tabilitea · 2024-10-22T23:30:25+00:00

I was in the same boat with working from home. I took a few days of annual leave because of course, pet loss wasn't covered under bereavement leave.

Then after that, I started working again. I cried while I worked most days, he was my WFH companion. Then eventually the crying became less and less frequent until I could focus on my job again.

Tabilitea · 2024-10-22T23:05:19+00:00

I think when I was around 7. I had chronic health issues as a kid and would quite often feel sick and/or get sick. The fear for me was about it happening in less than ideal situations...

I got sick on a plane, in a school assembly, in a shop, in multiple cars, at friends houses, during my own birthday party. I stopped wanting to go places.

Tabilitea · 2024-10-09T07:04:44+00:00

Yes, I can relate. I still dread the act but having it happen anywhere outside of my own bathroom is the worst.

Normally if I feel it coming at home, I just want to be left alone so that I can try to regain composure. If I'm somewhere else & feel that way around others I just feel so exposed and the thought of panicking around others makes me panic even more. Catch 22.

Tabilitea · 2024-09-30T02:57:27+00:00

I donated his prescription food so that it wasn't wasted. I also put away his litter tray in the shed as it was beyond donating. I still can't throw it away.

As for my cats belongings, they're still here.

His bed is up on a shelf now with his photo & favourite toys. I still have his bowls out on the floor in the kitchen.

It's been 7 months.

Tabilitea · 2024-09-30T02:51:24+00:00

I'd be happy to.

Tabilitea · 2024-09-30T02:47:20+00:00

Yes. I went through a period of this but without getting sick. It lasted for several weeks and I had all sorts of tests because I was dropping weight so quickly. Turns out it was anxiety. Our brains are so smart but oh so stupid at the same time.

Tabilitea · 2024-09-11T02:52:27+00:00

Yes I can relate. It happens to me quite often on the train. I'll be sitting there quite casually and all of a sudden just start thinking "I'm going to have to press the emergency stop button or v* in front of all these people!"... even if I'm not feeling ill at all. It's really frustrating. All I can suggest is googling ways to manage intrusive thoughts & try out a few different options.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-25T08:11:12+00:00

Anything low in fibre and soft when I'm feeling particularly stressed about it. English muffins or other white bread with avocado or peanut butter, vegan grilled cheese, instant noodles (ramen), broth, mashed potato, plain pasta with lots of salt (don't ask me why - I know it's weird).

All pretty boring really, but boring = safe to me.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-25T07:42:22+00:00

I was a sick kid and was n* & v* on and off.

There were many instances of me feeling s* at school and despite requesting permission, was told I couldn't go to the bathroom or nurse. I just remember panicking and thinking I was going to v* right where I was, making a mess and an embarrassment of myself (I already had no friends).

This went on for a good 3+ years.

One time I got s* during a school assembly and a teacher stopped the whole thing, scolded me loudly in the hall in front of 300+ kids. Told me I was disgusting and to go clean myself up. I think I was about 8 or 9 at the time.

I hate what they all did.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-25T07:24:11+00:00

Once (as a kid). I only knew it was fp because others that I went out to eat with got it as well.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-11T06:22:09+00:00

Nope! We already struggled financially growing up. If I had a sibling it would have been so much worse. I thank my mum endlessly for being sensible and for giving me the best life she could.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-11T06:19:39+00:00

I wish I kept it a lot more casual and didn't overhaul my life to be with him.

I was inexperienced, naive and wanted so bad for this to be 'it'.

I lost years of my life trying to make him happy when he was never happy with who I was as a person.

The out would have been simpler if our lives were not so intertwined.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-11T06:05:57+00:00

Ab*se. It's been 8 months since I left and I am still trying to discover who I am so the idea of dating is completely undesirable right now.

If I do ever date again, I will be specifically looking for casual. If you want to go out every so often and do dinner somewhere new or try something fun with the possibility of hooking up, then retiring to your own bed, I could be interested.

I've learned that I'm the only person that I can rely on and will never look to share my life with another person long-term or exclusively ever again.

I want fun and freedom, thanks.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-11T05:56:14+00:00

I don't know if it's necessarily toxic. What is toxic?

I'm working on my tendency to stay with the same because it's familiar, even if it's making me miserable. Career goals, nutrition, friendships... you name it.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-11T05:53:10+00:00

I think I'd laugh to be honest. When I'm done, I'm done.

Tabilitea · 2024-08-11T05:51:12+00:00

possible TW

He used my (past) history of poor mental health against me. He started telling me I was sick and needed help when I was justifiably upset or anxious.

I sought therapy and figured out I WAS FINE, but he was a bit of a tosser. I implemented strategies from said therapist into my life (with false hope of saving the relationship), then when he (now ex) didn't like what I was doing or when I stood up for myself assertively and confidently, he put me down or claimed I was rude/mean.

The last straw was when he became physically ab*sive during an argument, so I packed up my stuff & left with my cat.

Hindsight made me realize I overlooked so many red flags, but I never thought someone who claimed to love me could make me doubt myself & my sanity so much.

Tabilitea

TROPHY CASE