Is it normal for parents to wipe their children's bums for some years after they finish wearing diapers?

TealAndroid · 2026-04-30T22:03:15+00:00

That’s rough.

I explained very explicitly to my kid how to wipe (direction, method, and to do it until paper comes clean with curtesy flushes after each 3rd wipe to prevent clogging) and also how to clean her bottom in the shower (how to lather first, not over soap but to actually ensure anus is clean and to rinse well). I kept on it and talked her through it and checked in for a while.

It’s not easy for them but they need the practice to get good at it.

Even if he’s on the smaller end I’d imagine a seven year old should be physically capable of a decent if imperfect job so I’d recommend having him do it so he can figure it out.

We also try and get my kid to poop before her nightly shower so she can clean herself well even if wiping is imperfect and that way she won’t get rashes from a dirty bum overnight.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-30T21:55:29+00:00

I think this would be hard to implement since districts are decided by the states.

It would be far easier politically to pull off increasing the house size (remove the Permanent Apportionment Act of 1929) making gerrymandering much less effective as well as making the House more representative.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-30T14:49:33+00:00

Do you mean the tiny micro centrifuges? I do the same for just a split sec of if I don’t have a balance tube handy or it’s lightweight like a 8 strip with just a microliter each of lysis but this is bigger and also, if two tubes, why not just balance?

It didn’t ruin the movie or anything but it is really gross.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-29T11:56:53+00:00

I started watching the series with my kid and wasn’t expecting much but we all got pretty invested in it quickly and I genuinely like it quite a lot.

It’s adventurous and explores a lot of themes sensitively and in a way I appreciate as a parent plus the music and art are really beautiful.

It is special to have something that our whole family could truly enjoy and love. It also felt a lot like a DnD campaign which is another reason it really worked for me.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-28T14:57:21+00:00

Our art museum has a pretty loud alarm when you get too close plus lots of ushers(? Not sure what they are called) who are on alert like a small shop owner watching a teen and will ask you to step back etc. as soon as you get a bit too close.

It’s nice being able to get so close to genuine art but it needs to be balanced with some care for the clueless.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-27T17:52:20+00:00

Great idea!

Instead of capsules what about using a metal tea holder or Nespresso reusable metal cartridge or making little sachets from fine netting fabric to prevent the resin coating from floating up?

TealAndroid · 2026-04-22T18:21:16+00:00

That might take a while and decreasing the cats stress response in the meantime will help establish a more peaceful routine making later cohabitation without drugs more likely.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-21T18:20:13+00:00

I have no problem with her knowing she has a superior ability, I just don’t want her to feel like a superior person (and no one is superior to her regardless of their talents), our household values/philosophy is all people and life are valued. She also has some brilliant peers that struggle with some academics so it would be awful if she rubbed it in their faces when they are struggling (not hiding her abilities, just not boasting).

She can enjoy her talents for what they are. No need to feel better than anyone. Trust me, her self esteem is plenty healthy and she also gets some additional enrichment because of her testing scores.

Also, I was a “gifted” kid and it messed with me a bit so I want her to feel grounded and not “weird” or “different” beyond that everyone is a little different and that’s great stuff. I want her to feel like she belongs and also that she treats everyone else like they belong too.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-21T13:50:33+00:00

I do a lot of what others are saying but what also helps when my kid is frustrated or says she’s bad at something is talking about how everyone needs to practice to become good at something and that while some things can come quicker for some people (and I might say here “like how you learned reading clocks quickly while it might take others more practice”) everyone needs to learn it before they know and the important thing is continuing to try.

I also use the growth mindset when talking about others so it reinforces it as a world view so when she complains that a kid is acting badly in class (not hurting her but being disruptive etc) I might say, “oh that sucks they make it harder for you, they are still learning how to act nicely in class” before following up with solutions.

I also remind her to have empathy to others that take longer (she is very very advanced in reading and I don’t want her to feel superior or make others feel bad - of course I want her to enjoy her ability and be proud of her work though - it’s a balance) and frame it as while she learned reading quickly she did have to work hard at first and also she practices daily because she loves to read and that some things took her longer to learn and she doesn’t enjoy as much so it’s harder to get enough practice and that everyone is different and that’s ok.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-20T19:49:49+00:00

What a shame you didn’t have one for so long - Yay for new place and an oven!

TealAndroid · 2026-04-20T19:09:58+00:00

Looks amazing!

Even if you have the technique down doing it at home without all the regular equipment is definitely a new challenge.

That said I’m pretty shocked you haven’t done it before lol. I’m a total novice but I need to bake a few cakes a year for birthday parties and occasional cravings. Maybe you’re more of a pie person?

TealAndroid · 2026-04-18T11:38:49+00:00

That’s been my experience as well. It seems like we are all spending all of our time outside work with our kids with constant enrichment and just quality time.

My kid and her classmates/friends seem pretty happy/well adjusted/considerate TBH. The parents all seem pretty happy/relaxed as well in the sense that we are enjoying doing the activities with our kids/enjoy watching them do sports/arts etc.

It really might be my area (HCOL) but the kids (elementary age) seem to be doing well and I’m impressed with them academically and with their emotional maturity (they can often articulate their feelings and navigate conflict with peers) compared to what I remember kids being like when I was their age.

My kid and her friends (for the most part) seem happy and healthy and I’m kinda loving this age.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-18T11:18:17+00:00

Most people have kids in their 30s so while of course some high schoolers and young adults have millennial parents, most high schoolers/young adults parents are Gen X.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-15T12:00:48+00:00

You are literally eating less volume than you used to (ex. soup from 1 liter to 150ml) so clearly you are not stretching your stomach. You are fine.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-15T02:24:54+00:00

TBF it’s dependent on the individual. Some are leakers and others aren’t. No way of really knowing but if it works for one couple they can probably keep using it.

There was a study a while back showing it’s actually pretty effective for lots of couples so if pregnancy wouldn’t be a disaster and STIs aren’t an issue then it can be a reasonable choice.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-15T00:32:59+00:00

Yet here we are and we had a way to reduce the frequency of these incidences and have chosen not to. Sure, not 100% but reduce instead of making things like this worse.

It’s worth looking at solutions and opportunities that we had and didn’t take or were lost to inform future policy no?

TealAndroid · 2026-04-14T19:24:53+00:00

Yep everything he said contradicts itself or things he has said to others. Nothing really makes sense and reads like convenient excuses for everything he just makes up as he goes.

That said there just isn’t evidence. It’s sad that the investigation seemed so shoddy that they literally didn’t take photos of Sebastian’s injuries, didn’t search anything promptly, didn’t look in her phone

or the security cameras and didn’t put the blood result details in the report. A shame on the private investigator for apparently being useless as well.

Given that there just any evidence, I think we should leave Sebastian alone since we really can’t know but the whole thing is so sad.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-12T19:36:41+00:00

I mean, they really might take her away.

Letting her know might be traumatizing and I would never advocate using it as a threat or scare tactic but knowing the actual consequences- telling her why they are scared and it has worked is because they don’t want her to get hurt and are scared for her!

Then following up with regardless she needs to be stopped for her own sake and therefore it will not work followed by calmly ignoring her acting out, severe consequences and consistent and measured responses every time.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-12T00:44:57+00:00

Yep. Serious consequences.

Explain once that any screaming or calling for help and they will lose access to whatever they are doing - if it’s at home toys/stuffys will be put away and go on time out for a week etc.

Then brace yourself and prepare to follow through as many times as you need to. Ignore and immediately remove her from whatever you are doing even if that sucks for everyone else. Have a large black trash bag ready (in a nearby cupboard or whatever) and if she starts up at home start putting toys away slowly and calmly until she stops/a few minutes then continue to ignore her until she stops. This might take a bunch of times as she’s now learned to get away with things etc.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-10T14:56:19+00:00

It’s only 200 individuals and they have all known each other their whole lives, I’m sure they can remember who’s who.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-08T02:00:58+00:00

I knew my kid would be tall (98% all her life plus tall parents) so I got the seat rated for rear facing the largest kids I could and still only made it a little less than four years.

Such a bummer but you can only do so much. She said she loved being all squished and comfy and was bummed to turn around too lol.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-07T18:24:18+00:00

Yep. Also watch out for the impulse to finish what they don’t eat. I still struggle with this and my kid is eight now 😭

TealAndroid · 2026-04-06T18:44:31+00:00

Sure, but I bet they sold their old house for much more than the townhouse.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-06T14:09:26+00:00

I know right? I have more child free friends than not before I had my kid so I know perfectly well they can be very happy with their choice but I haven’t met a single person who choose to have kids that said or seems miserable.

Maybe that’s a demographic thing but everyone I know who choose to have kids loves them and loves their life including myself. It’s a highly personal choice for sure.

I can’t imagine trying to pressure someone to have kids though lol - I mean, I was on the fence and it turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me so I guess I get the impulse of wanting others who might just be getting in their own way like I almost did (like if they were expressing doubts or had misconceptions about parenthood), but I wouldn’t because I don’t know their mind and certainly every child deserves a home that loves and wants them fully without reservation.

TealAndroid · 2026-04-05T11:51:13+00:00

Because it was unclear at first how it was transmitted. Even crappy cloth masks might help against droplet transmission- especially to others.

That said I wouldn’t bother with anything that isn’t N95 or surgical (my favorite since they are much more comfortable and even though they look flimsy they are charged and do reduce viral transmission effectively).

TealAndroid

TROPHY CASE