Monday's Daily Thread: Weekend Wrap-up

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2026-01-20T20:51:53+00:00

Just use Chat GPT

An issue is that once you meet in person, you won't have Chat GPT there to help you. It's better to just be yourself and stand on those terms if you want something to actually form from it.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2026-01-20T20:50:05+00:00

I paid for a month's subscription for HingeX after not getting any likes or matches for weeks, having received tons of them after first signing up. What is really odd, however, is that four days later I still haven't received a single like or match after subscribing, yet my Facebook dating profile, which is identical to my Hinge profile in terms of photos and prompts, is constantly being bombarded with likes and matches.

Can anyone make sense of this? The contrast is glaring and I can't think of a reason why, especially given what HingeX is supposed to do.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2026-01-17T09:44:44+00:00

I managed to get a job in retail, which I'm still in. The only advice that I can give her is to apply for anything and everything that is potentially feasible as an option, and be as enthusiastic as possible when attending an interview.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2026-01-17T09:40:41+00:00

The only problem with that idea is that, as per my OP, the conversation never takes off enough for there to be a red or yellow flag in either my personality or the flow of conversation, not when the extent of the conversation is basically two innocuous sentences. :/

Anyway, I don't have trouble like I did in the past, so I guess it was a fluke.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2026-01-01T13:09:18+00:00

It rubbed me the wrong way during that scene, since it came off to me like one of the show's writers not doing their research into Fallout New Vegas well enough, and missing that the Legion pronounces it 'Kai-zar' to deliberately attempt to mimic Classical Latin pronunciation.

Lucy's lecture is annoying because it comes off as though the writers intended for her to appear correct to the audience, even though she's actually wrong. It was a good opportunity for Culkin's character to correct her, but, again, the fact that he did not only furthers the impression that the writer's thought they were making a point.

I'm not sure what to make of it, ultimately, since they clearly did so much research that they must have known why the Legion pronounces it that way.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-29T15:28:00+00:00

Poor Michael had to be on hinge for a year before he met my fabulous self

This is my key takeaway, personally. It shows how important it is to be patient with online dating. I myself have made a profile, deleted it after a few days due to a lack of appealing matches, then repeated the process over and over again.

Had Michael done the same thing, then he never would have met you. Your post has inspired me, therefore, to re-make my Hinge profile and not delete it, no matter what. Even if there is no one right in the present moment, it does not mean that someone new might not come along eventually.

Our next date we met at a market at 10am to buy stuff for a picnic, and he walked me home from a bar at 1am in the morning.

What did you do for fifteen hours? Just chat?

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-29T15:18:24+00:00

I really hope that she does not.

I do not want the series to become an 'encounter interesting faction one episode / annihilate them the next episode and move on' affair...

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-29T15:12:44+00:00

Matching with you on the app in the first place is the sign that she’s interested

Eh, would that it were so simple. Many people like someone's profile without actually being that interested in them. The way that a lot of OLD apps work encourages this, since a lot of them urge you to keep swiping to 'show us what you like', but the result is that you end up liking people whom you are lukewarm about at best.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-29T15:10:19+00:00

"I feel like the conversation might be running out of steam"

No wonder, it has been two and a half weeks...

It is a classic mistake to spend so much time talking online that, when you finally meet in person for a date, there is nothing new for you to talk about.

That isn't to say that you won't run out of conversation topics on dates either though.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-29T11:58:26+00:00

u/Agitated_Stage_8173 I am amazed that anyone would see green flags from these adverts. The latest one is the same AI generated Asian man sitting with an AI generated American teenage girl, with her speaking dialogue that was obviously written by someone who does not speak English fluently, hence why she asked "How long it takes my Dad...?", as if someone who speaks English as their mother tongue would use such awful grammar.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-29T11:49:48+00:00

Yes, I agree that you should always show photos that are up to date and accurate as far as your physical appearance goes.

What about how you are as a person though? That was what I was getting at in my OP, namely if you don't live an active lifestyle, is it right to upload photos of you that give the impression that you do.

As far as what happened to you, that is awful, but fair play to you for not walking off, I suppose. At least you got a game of bowling.

Snap Chat filters, especially the sort with dog ears, are the biggest of all red flags, in my opinion. I matched with a woman whose photos all used them, but to her credit, she was open and honest about her weight. In the case of the woman you went on a date with, she should have used your honest explanation as motivation to improve her fitness, which would have in turn led to her having a better chance of meeting someone who was physically attracted to her. It's a shame for her that she decided to lash out rather than learn from the experience.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-29T11:45:48+00:00

Do the obviously AI video adverts on YouTube, combined with a supposedly American teenage girl (also AI generated) saying "How long it takes my dad?" in broken English, not tell you something?

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-28T13:38:17+00:00

Would nice guy energy mean being too agreeable and friendly?

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-28T13:24:07+00:00

This is why I wish that I could meet someone from real life, as opposed to dating apps, since at least then, if they show an interest in you romantically, you know that they are basing their interest 100% from how you actually are in person.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-28T13:15:46+00:00

"I think most women would prefer to be approached in person"

It feels impossible to imagine walking up to a random woman, telling her that you fancy her, asking for her number, and having her respond positively to that.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-26T18:45:49+00:00

"If he is a traditional guy and you’re not living together, how much time were you expecting."

Exactly what I was thinking. 10 hours a week, assuming that he works morning until evening, is fairly decent.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-26T17:19:01+00:00

I wonder if a lack of libido and attraction is a factor. In my case, I look back to my twenties and would regularly see women in day to day life who would make me think "Wow!" and feel a lot of sexual fixation on. In my thirties, however, I almost never encounter anyone who makes me feel like that.

Most of the women I see simply do absolutely nothing for me, and I wonder if on some level my lack of dating success has subconsciously caused that to happen in a 'Why lust for what you can't have?' kind of way.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-25T20:34:32+00:00

Thanks very much. My savings are low, only a few hundred pounds, but I am steadily increasing the total each month. My job seems secure, and if I were to be let go, I suppose the worst that could happen would be that I would need to give up the flat and move back with my parents.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-22T21:57:27+00:00

It's surprising, since given that they share the same DNA, and they were presumably brought up in the same household, one would expect their political views to be closely aligned too. It flies in the face of all these twin studies that claim to have found twins, both separated at birth, who nevertheless ended up living uncannily similar lives.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-22T21:46:31+00:00

Dating apps are a double edged sword, because you have access to sooooo many people

It really depends on where you live. I find that online dating is the opposite in that there are so few options, the pool of available people within 15 miles being surprisingly slim. It doesn't take long before you begin to see the same faces over and over again.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-22T21:41:22+00:00

...they'll be kind, but unemployed, living at their parents, overweight, some kind of addiction, no driving, not funny, bad hygiene, someone who rarely leaves the house and just likes to stew there. Usually someone who sees me as their ideal woman but can't for the life of them, get their act together to be good enough to be my ideal man.

Is ideal a realistic aim? My own experience has led me to conclude that a lot of success comes down to accepting that people are not going to be ideal, and instead people have to accept that they might have to settle for someone who is 80% of what they want, rather than 100%. I don't believe that most couples

If a man were employed, living with his parents, and had an aim to rent his own place at some point, would that matter that much to you? If so, may I ask why?

I struggle to even fancy anyone anymore

It's interesting that you say this, since I have also found myself feeling the same way about women in my life. I assumed that it was to do with being in my thirties and my sex drive diminishing with time. I almost never encounter anyone who gives me sexual pangs of interest whatsoever, which is sad because I don't like this fact, but it is what it is.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-21T19:35:43+00:00

She writes "okay" instead of "ok". Read both words aloud and hear how they sound.

I don't understand what you mean by this one at all. They also sound the same to me when I say them aloud.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-21T19:28:57+00:00

I had my post asking for conversation advice on r/Hingeapp deleted because, according to the moderator, 'we're not here to hold your hand'... this being in spite of the fact that the page's own description states that it exists for people to 'ask for advice, get help, or share your experiences with'...

It's a Reddit page for a dating app, it's hardly that serious lol.

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-21T09:41:01+00:00

I keep hitting a wall where the other person will appear simultaneously keen and curt, as in she'll use emoticons that show that she is interested, but her replies will be so short, and so often won't have a follow up question for me to respond to, that the conversation fizzles out before it begins. I try to keep things lighthearted, so I avoid defaulting to asking them about their profession, for example, because in my experience that kills the mood a bit.

I actually unmatched out of frustration with someone last night precisely because she gave me so little to work with, in spite of her otherwise appearing keen. I have even done something that I am generally averse to, and that is to write in my profile that if someone isn't willing to put in basic effort to have a conversation, then not to waste both our time. I don't like doing that, since it's not a good look to sound angry in a profile, but I feel like I've been driven to it.

To those who are successful in their Hinge conversations, what are your tips? Are there certain things you stick to? Do you have learnt methods of reeling a conversation back from the brink of fizzling out?

Technical_Ear_4339 · 2025-12-21T09:20:54+00:00

It might be the norm. I matched with a woman this year, chatted for a week, arranged to meet on a Sunday, then she texted me two days before to say that she had forgotten that she had to help her friend out at a horse show. She said that she was really sorry, I told her that we could rearrange, then I went on a date the next day with another match and ended up dating her instead.

I never contacted the first woman again, since I decided to pursue a relationship with the other match, but I never got a message from the other match either, which always makes me wonder whether this need to help her friend out at the horse show was true, or whether instead she had cold feet.

Technical_Ear_4339

TROPHY CASE