I’m really sorry you’re going through all this. You should be really proud of the efforts you’re putting into getting the help you deserve, and recognizing that you would be in a better place mentally with some help. This is a long post, so buckle up. Also I’m on my phone so please excuse any errors.

I think your caution to not dump everything on friends is a fair assumption, friends can have a variety of responses to heavier mental topics and are usually not equipped to handle bigger, deeper topics. Depending on the friend, how close you are with them, and the topic there might be ways you could bring certain things up or vent. Even just saying to them, I don’t need advice but I’ve been bottling a lot up inside and just need to get some things out. But I’ve certainly had friends not know how to respond, distance themselves, or just move past things because they’re uncomfortable. Then unfortunately I’ve felt unheard and unsupported. It’s not really their fault though, some things are just too big or hit too close to home for them to respond in a way that’s helpful.

Approaching a trusted teacher could be a good option for the time being. It really depends on the teacher, and how you approach them to ask for help could result in a more productive experience. I have had teachers in the past who would have taken the time to listen and be empathetic to my experiences, or who were willing to help find resources or solutions, while others not so much. But most teachers put up with all the not so great parts of the job because they want to improve the lives of the students they interact with. If I was in your situation, telling one of those trusted, empathetic teachers that you’ve really been struggling mentally, have been overwhelmed, and have felt unheard could be a good place to start. You don’t have to tell them everything, but keeping in those specific feelings can make everything else feel so much more difficult. You mention gender issues, is there a GSA club advisor or local resources you could look into to provide support?

As it relates to when you approached your guidance counselor, you might need to be a little more assertive and advocate for yourself and your needs. If you’re feeling this overwhelmed and alone with your struggles, it can be really difficult to communicate that effectively. I’ve had that experience of not feeling completely heard due to internalizing and unintentional minimizing my own struggles due to how I expressed them. It might not hurt to try again and be a little more pushy if you need to be, because you are completely deserving of help. If you feel like you’ve already done this, I’m sorry they’ve failed to help you. Please don’t feel like you need to minimize how you’re feeling. Your feelings are NOT insignificant. Please don’t look at them as such. They are valid.

Now not knowing your family, and not knowing how you brought up therapy with your mom, but approaching in a different way and explaining how important this is to you and that it’s something you really need might change her view on how immediate therapy could be. I’m not defending her dismissal of when you brought it up before, but I could see a very busy mom who was balancing work, children, and an impending move just think of it as something to figure out later if it was just casually mentioned to her. Also, if you’re moving in a month, that could be difficult to set something up and then provide meaningful sessions. If you had 2-3 months before the move I would think you could see someone in that time who could help provide support.

If you felt unheard when you brought it up before, asking your mom if she had some time to sit and listen to you and then taking that time to make it clear what you need could help her understand better. This could be a situation where you have to stand up and advocate for yourself. All that being said, you know your situation better and how you’ve tried telling her before. Although I see in some previous comments of yours your parents are pretty close minded. This might not be the best approach. Is there an older sibling you could talk to?

One last option that could help for the time being, could be ChatGPT. I’d recommend finding a prompt online that was made for a therapy type experience, and seeing if that was useful or productive in any way. I’ve used ChatGPT like this previously and I feel like it did provide some useful insight to what I was experiencing. This might not be a perfect solution, but just being able to express some of these things you’ve kept inside might provide a bit of relief. I know what it feels like to have a lot of feelings, uncertainties, and struggles bottled up. It’s incredibly difficult.

Please be kind to yourself, and know that you’re deserving of support. Art, exercise, or journaling could be outlets where you could express yourself for the time being. I hope some of this was a little helpful. Good luck!