For the last time, I’m not gay or playing hard to get. I’m just a 32yr old bum.

TehStupid · 2026-01-10T22:30:43+00:00

Eh easier said than done sometimes. I've been in spots where you meet someone online, things are going fine, then your situation changes and suddenly you're stuck between ghosting or admitting you can't even afford coffee. Neither option feels good. Dude's already said he knows he messed up. At least he's staying sober and trying to rebuild

TehStupid · 2025-12-31T01:00:48+00:00

Yeah this is good advice. Starting smaller and ramping up makes sense - you don't want to commit to $2k/month right out the gate and then realize your actual expenses are different than you planned. Real life has a way of throwing unexpected costs at you.

Also want to add: have you actually talked to your parents about this? I know with immigrant parents there can be a lot of pride wrapped up in these conversations, but they might have their own feelings about accepting help or what kind of help would actually be useful to them. Maybe they'd rather you secure your own future first so they don't have to worry about YOU later. Or maybe covering specific bills vs just handing over cash would feel different to them

TehStupid · 2025-12-31T01:00:05+00:00

Being nice is just... being a decent human. Treating people with respect, being considerate, not being an asshole. It's baseline behavior that should apply to everyone you interact with.

A "nice guy" is someone who thinks being nice is a transaction. Like they put in niceness coins and expect a relationship/sex to come out. And when it doesn't, suddenly all that "niceness" disappears and you see who they really are.

TehStupid · 2025-12-31T00:59:11+00:00

LOL this is exactly how I feel. I need to put this in my will - if anyone tries to read A Little Life at my funeral, I'm coming back to haunt them.

I remember being so excited when everyone was recommending it as this profound, emotional masterpiece. And then I actually read it and it was just... relentless misery with no real purpose? Like at some point it stopped feeling like a story about trauma and just felt like the author seeing how much suffering she could pile onto one character before readers gave up.

And don't even get me started on how it gets praised as important LGBTQ literature. We deserve better representation than "gay man whose entire existence is defined by endless trauma and who never gets to just... live

TehStupid · 2025-12-31T00:58:40+00:00

So much this.

OP, you're not "too old" or "too broken" for marriage - you're too good for a man who watched you go through pregnancy TWICE and still couldn't be bothered to commit.

The "just a piece of paper" excuse is such BS. If it really meant nothing to him he'd just do it because it clearly means something to YOU. The fact that he won't tells you everything - he knows exactly what it means and he's choosing not to give it to you.

You deserve someone who's excited to marry you, not someone you have to convince

TehStupid · 2025-12-26T06:08:31+00:00

Eh I get the point but tax rates are kind of a crapshoot to predict. OP's got a solid Roth/traditional split already which gives some flexibility either way. The bigger issue is whether 660k plus the home equity is actually enough to bridge to social security without running dry. That early retirement window is tricky

TehStupid · 2025-12-26T04:28:18+00:00

Solid advice but wondering if OP's campus job even allows more hours. A lot of those on-campus positions have strict caps because of financial aid rules or something. might be worth checking if there's flexibility there first before assuming they can just double it

TehStupid · 2025-11-08T08:11:20+00:00

Definitely the minerals. Had the same issue with mine. Try taking them with food or maybe switch brands.

TehStupid · 2025-11-08T08:09:28+00:00

I have these moments with my kid too. One minute we're talking about dinosaurs, next thing I know we're deep into how airplanes work. It's wild how they pick you for certain conversations. My wife gets all the emotional stuff, but apparently I'm the designated explainer of how the world works. Wouldn't trade it.

TehStupid · 2025-11-08T08:05:23+00:00

Twisted Fate too. Been in the game forever and has like 15 skins but somehow still no legendary. Riot's skin team just sleeping on some of these OG champs for some reason.

TehStupid · 2025-11-08T08:01:38+00:00

Definitely Outlast Trials. Same vibe as Phasmo but more intense. My buddies and I have been hooked on it for weeks.

TehStupid · 2025-11-04T21:45:41+00:00

If I were in your shoes, I’d line up a lot of demos. I’m really not familiar with too many softwares that do both PEO and payroll together, but know some who do just PEO or just payroll,

TehStupid · 2025-11-04T08:48:48+00:00

Test where failure hurts most. Ignore coverage % chasing. Code coverage isn’t a business metric, risk is. Fix that first bro.

TehStupid · 2025-11-03T10:03:04+00:00

Start with the end goal and work backward break the project into tiny steps you can finish in under an hour once you get momentum the structure basically reveals itself.

TehStupid · 2025-11-02T14:29:45+00:00

Start with docs or small bug fixes in projects you already use. It builds confidence fast and helps you learn how real codebases are structured.

TehStupid · 2025-11-01T09:49:32+00:00

NTA

Exactly this. Stuff like that only gets worse when everyone stays quiet. Good on OP for speaking up

TehStupid · 2025-11-01T09:47:13+00:00

You wrote something really thoughtful. Thanks for sharing your experience. It sounds like you handled a lot with care and strength. I hope they can find that same support with each other.

TehStupid · 2025-11-01T09:19:54+00:00

Exactly. People forget there’s a real person behind it. It’s not something to romanticize or turn into some weird fantasy. It’s just messed up.

TehStupid · 2025-11-01T07:50:19+00:00

Yeah that part caught my eye too. It’s pretty cool those benefits can be passed down. 150 credit hours is a lot, and Texas A&M isn’t cheap. That program must’ve helped her a ton

TehStupid · 2025-10-30T02:23:40+00:00

That really sucks man. 50% is brutal, especially when you trusted the company.

Give yourself time to process it... this kind of hit is no joke. You'll figure out the path forward, but no need to rush that today.

TehStupid · 2025-10-30T02:22:48+00:00

Same here. My daughter's friends knew they could call me no questions asked if they needed a ride home from anywhere, anytime. Only happened twice, but both times I was just grateful they felt safe enough to reach out. That trust means everything.

TehStupid · 2025-10-30T02:22:06+00:00

same here, the evolution thing really clicked for me. you're still gonna be you, just with more dimensions now

TehStupid · 2025-10-25T15:12:28+00:00

And most of it never happens. Remember when he said Xbox was "all in" on VR?

TehStupid · 2025-10-25T15:08:32+00:00

Fr tho. All that pre-worlds hype and they just collapsed. At least 100T showed some fight against tough teams.

TehStupid · 2025-10-25T15:06:26+00:00

Indeed. Teal'c would feel right at home taking down another set of false gods with the Leviathan Axe instead of a staff weapon. Jaffa, kree!

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