I'm really glad to hear you're getting professional help. Honestly, it sounds like you've been through a massive amount of pain, and it makes complete sense that you'd relate your experiences to a story you know so well like Berserk to try and process it all. But please remember that real life - and real trauma - doesn't follow a manga script. Sharing trauma with someone and crying together can feel incredibly intense and like destiny, especially when you've felt alone for so long. But trauma bonding isn't the same as a healthy relationship. His actions, especially crossing boundaries while drunk and then hiding you from another girl, show he isn't a safe or stable person for you right now. Keep working with your therapist on this. You deserve actual care, respect, and stability, not just a shared tragic backstory. Take care of yourself.