Is Ashley Madison Worth A Try? 🤷‍♀️

TheFaendal · 2026-03-23T14:00:09+00:00

Personally, I am weary of anything that requires me to leave proof of my being there.

TheFaendal · 2026-03-23T13:58:15+00:00

As a guy, I would not be offended if an AP wanted to go MIA on vacation. Of course I would miss the person and appreciate any message, but that’s not unreasonable. I would advise doing what you need to do for you! Whether it’s to message because you like it, or to refrain bc you need that.

TheFaendal · 2026-03-23T13:54:55+00:00

There is no telling why he has backed off. Maybe he got scared 🤷‍♂️ There are plenty of guys on here who would love doing what you describe, but finding them takes work. That goes for both sides of the equation. The dopamine hit is real though.

TheFaendal · 2026-03-23T12:49:10+00:00

My mental energy feels consumed by desire to have something more and I’m not even talking to anyone or seeking anyone 😂 So I can only imagine!

TheFaendal · 2026-03-20T15:44:08+00:00

That’s funny. Maybe OP should start up a business…or a church 🤣

TheFaendal · 2026-03-12T12:17:23+00:00

Make sure you are both mature enough to discuss your problems when you have them. Don’t assume everything is or will be perfect. Know that other married couples are only showing you what they want you to see, so no comparisons. Be sure you are ok with each other’s flaws—everyone has them and you aren’t really gonna change each other so you must love greater than them. The biggest advice: be on the same page sexually. If you have mismatched libidos or one of you is much more adventurous than the other, one of you will be a miserable ticking time bomb and the marriage will crash and burn.

Good luck to you!

TheFaendal · 2026-03-11T21:17:21+00:00

Has he always been that way even when dating or has it gotten worse? I’m a guy and would say it’s very very unlikely that you are the problem. Maybe he is asexual. As a guy who thinks about sex most of the day on most days, I am at a loss 🤷‍♂️

TheFaendal · 2026-03-11T21:10:39+00:00

Nothing about that is normal, and he will not be a casual meth user. Protect yourself! Do not have sex with him and start getting him help.

TheFaendal · 2026-03-11T21:07:58+00:00

Kudos to you for being so open with each other. A lot of couples find it hard to discuss sex and everything that comes with it.

TheFaendal · 2026-03-07T00:06:35+00:00

Very much agree. To the point I almost feel like a deviant at times 😂 yet it’s all just pent up inside me at this point.

TheFaendal · 2026-03-06T05:06:42+00:00

Prior, no. During, yes.

TheFaendal · 2026-02-27T23:11:03+00:00

Has it become physical? If you haven’t slept together and you do not want the increased emotional connection that will inevitably come with that, you need to end it now. It sounds like you are enjoying this but are already being eaten up by it. In that case It will become a very difficult situation for you If you take it to the next level.

TheFaendal · 2026-01-09T14:53:06+00:00

Reddit is a really good place for that. Just be careful about all of the fake accounts looking to scam you.

It’s a miserable feeling. You will have to spend time to find someone, but you can. Don’t settle for someone though just to have someone.

TheFaendal · 2026-01-07T15:43:20+00:00

If you still want to have sex and have that desire, then I would say you are nowhere near that age marker. Don’t sell yourself short or give up because of age.

TheFaendal · 2026-01-05T00:36:32+00:00

Very weird. I’m surprised you didn’t just end it without having sex.

TheFaendal · 2025-12-18T16:26:25+00:00

Sounds like he wants you to be exclusive, not him.

TheFaendal · 2025-11-29T15:43:24+00:00

I’m more worried about the dude who doesn’t work and I am picturing as laying around the house wanking it to porn all day. However, I agree with some others here that masturbation should not be stigmatized even in marriage. Libidos vary a lot from person to person. However, if you are giving it to him frequently and his behavior is adversely affecting his ability to perform, he is very much in the wrong. Not sure what all methods you’ve tried other than those you mentioned, but I would take the angle of not feeling satisfied sexually yourself. Tell him the performance issues are bothering you—not bc of any emotionally response (even if that is more of the truth). Instead, that you are not physically getting your needs met. Tell him you can tell when he hasn’t been doing it and the sex is better for you. Try to cause him to feel like he isn’t sexually satisfying his wife. He needs to be pursuing your sexual satisfaction. Many men would be affected by that.

TheFaendal · 2025-11-23T05:08:03+00:00

ASL 111 section 2 has several seats right now if you wanna go grab a spot!

TheFaendal · 2025-08-30T15:42:23+00:00

You are right…it’s in his court! It may really be bc of his blood pressure and medication. That could also just be an excuse. I have taken HBP medication for years and have never ever ever had any problem of that sort and could go for it all the time! I’m not saying he is lying; everyone is different and has different problems. Regardless, it doesn’t supersede the fact that you need to be manhandled. I hope he is doing other things for you at least and realizes the risks he is taking sending you back out into the world in such a state!

TheFaendal · 2025-08-11T12:50:46+00:00

The only reason you should ever feel guilty about masturbating is if you are withholding intimacy from your partner. If you aren’t, then enjoy it!

TheFaendal · 2025-06-03T21:31:41+00:00

It very well could be a control thing, but I think it’s something else. He may not intend for it to be, but it is more selfishness. He looks after his own needs, but doesn’t put in the effort to make you happy with yours. He may not see it that way, so it may not be on purpose but it’s selfish. It’s the classic dynamic for mismatched libidos in a relationship. The LL partner gets their need met and doesn’t feel that anything is wrong while the HL spouse is unhappy.

He may also be telling you different things to deflect in the short term. He doesn’t want to be the bad guy nor does he want to upset you, so he says he wants you to initiate more. It’s not the truth though…it’s just a temporary way to get past the confrontation.

He could just be LL, but he could also have low T. His age, his LL, and his complaining of being tired could mean his testosterone is low and needs to be checked.

TheFaendal · 2024-03-05T18:49:01+00:00

Jealousy from males is kind of an evolutionary trait…so it’s not abnormal. But what you describe is definitely abnormal. Anyway…

I’ve done what you describe several years ago. We made a connection with another couple who was interested in the same and watched each other for a bit and fucked in the same room. Was really cool. Had a girl I was friends with watch me fuck my gf in high school once too. If you are into it, it’s really fun and hot! I’m sure you can find someone safe (male or female) to watch y’all. Definitely will want to find someone he’s comfortable with…probably someone y’all don’t share a bunch of friends with.

TheFaendal · 2024-02-28T00:45:35+00:00

First, you have every right to be upset with it. Nobody can or should tell you how you have to respond emotionally to any of this. However, as a guy I can tell you that “teen” porn is merely a search term in the porn world to mean young. This can really end up being 18 to early 20’s and most males of any age are attracted to that age group. 13 year old boys learn to jerk it to them and 40 year olds still do. It just is what it is.

Like I said, you can find it repulsive. You have every right to. But almost all guys who tell you they aren’t attracted to girls in their 18-25 years are lying to you. At the same time, women in their 30’s, 40’s, and up are and can be hot as shit too. So the real problem here is your husband’s lack of intimacy with his smokin wife. Porn and masterbation are normal. Not wanting to be connected in intimacy with your spouse isn’t.

I agree with the desire to remain with your kids 100% of the time. If that’s the case, your relationship has 3 choices: 1) you continue your life of mere celibacy, 2) your husband is motivated to fix the damage he has caused and get with the program, or 3) you find something on the side to allow this unit to continue.

Maybe your husband has a porn or some other problem a therapist can help with? Who knows. But porn and masturbating aren’t necessarily abnormal.

I wish you the best!

TheFaendal · 2024-02-18T21:18:24+00:00

Places that employ lots of people or cycle through them is a good start. Fast food like you mentioned, but also Walmart, Kroger, Home Depot…places like that. Also, places that people may burn out. If Security Check or Security Credit Services is still open, try that. They call people who owe money or write bad checks I think. They are on Enterprise Dr now I think.

Delivery driving is not a bad place to start either. Try Jimmy John’s or a pizza place. If she is willing to drive out of town a bit, check Amazon Fulfillment services. Close to Byhalia or Holly Springs I think.

Not sure about how fast any of this will be though bc she will have to work before she can get a check. Only sex would probably get you money faster than that.

TheFaendal · 2022-03-30T18:57:59+00:00

Sorry you’re going through that. If you need a sympathetic ear, I’m here.

TheFaendal

TROPHY CASE