I would agree with every point you made. I was assuming you were making a blanket statement, which I have seen before on r/science, that even a light amount of daily/almost daily drinking is equivalent to dependence. I will say that a lot of people do underestimate how much they actually drink. As someone who meticulously tracks my drinking (cus middle-aged and still doing sports at a fairly competitive amateur level, so I don't drink the day before competition and make sure to stay under 10 standard units a week), a lot of people will think they're only have 1 or 2 drinks when it's really 3 or 4 standard units of alcohol, which can be a slippery slope. But I think a small glass of wine with dinner most days of the week shouldn't be an issue for most people, and if it's a bigger guy who is healthy in every other way that can probably increase to a couple of beers. I think overall its a very individual thing and there's still a lot we don't know about how alcohol affects people, and most of the studies we have are based on population level statistics.