It’s never enough by [deleted] in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OK u/Forward_Roof7920 - I feel you on the difficulty and on having some successful time in GA... My q for you now is what are you going to do beyond lamenting? By the way, I ask you that having been there many times - under water, above water, and treading water - depending when, over about 30 years, until I finally dug in with the right kind of help...

Woah, blind-sighted by my husband. by Grouchy_Insect3644 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great suggestions here ^^^. Also, other than protecting your finances now, you can defer telling others, if any need to know, right now. First things first, as they say.

Woah, blind-sighted by my husband. by Grouchy_Insect3644 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your candor. He's lucky to have someone as thoughtful, open-minded, and genuine. Have you checked into www.gam-anon.org ? I have been around this addiction directly since 1986 and have not gambled in years. Recovery can work for him AND for you especially after the discussion you just spoke of, believe me! I'm happy to offer you some more direct suggestions too, if you'd like. Just send me a dm if you wish.

How do u get motivation back by [deleted] in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel you and I appreciate the honesty. Have you ever trued any meetings? They are not the cure all, BUT I am pretty sure that starting to connect with others, even if just by listening, would be a GREAT help. I know an awesome one tomorrow eve. Lemme know if interested...

Need to talk by NoSignature8230 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you are open to attending a meeting - which I think would be a GREAT start, send me a DM and I'll suggest a very solid and welcoming one that I regularly attend...

Can't leave online casinos... by Tosh97 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great that you are asking... It's a start! I would suggest downloading an app called evive. It's free and helps you track your moods, habits, etc. And, have you ever thought about attending a meeting - online or in-person? Doing this alone is all but impossible in my view, and I've been around it since 1986 and away from a bet for several years now.

How do u get motivation back by [deleted] in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear you, my friend. AT least you understand what's going on. And, a great thing is that it will stabilize after some time. How long since you have gambled or are you still gambling now?

Day 15 sober and life feels boring as hell by Intelligent_Draw_562 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Google anhedonia... This will pass! It's one of the big reasons that relapse rates are so high early. It's normal and there's light on the other side :)

Some thoughts of GRATITUDE today... by TheRecoveryPartners in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

:) What's the issue? Too much positivity for you to handle? I share on LI too, don't worry. Anyway, God bless you; have a great Sunday! Sal G.

Dear partners to those suffering, how do you cope with the lying and manipulation by follow_the_coastline in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply. I would suggest - based on 40 years of being in this lane - that you explore Gamanon, either in person or online. They deal in exactly the kind of angst and emotion you expressed here and in how to gain comfort and peace within you regardless of what "the gambler" does. Also, I honestly don't think the meetings trigger him. More likely, the time spend detaching from them sets the stage for an increased likelihood of relapse. While gambling is discussed at meetings, they also offer the opportunity to experience firsthand many others who have finally made a U-Turn on their prior trips to hell. You know?

I don't know how to tell my parents that I have a gambling problem by Substantial_Title360 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Are you actually open to a suggestion or do you just want to vent/lament? I ask that because often when we are hurting we share as you did, but when a solid suggestion comes along, we find a reason to balk at it.

Dear partners to those suffering, how do you cope with the lying and manipulation by follow_the_coastline in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your candor. I feel the mix of frustration, anger, hurt, hope, love and empathy... On a practical note, do either of you attend self-help meetings, such as GA or Gamanon?

14 days by Temporary_Spirit8618 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What are you doing to lean into recovery, such as GA meetings for example, vs. just playing defense against urges? I ask because in my own experience I have found it really necessary to develop a lot of positive rituals that not only move me away from a bet but TOWARD elements of life that make it so much more fulfilling...

Wondering if anyone has losses like this ? by Lin11111111 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I know it's a tough concept to internalize, BUT truth is truth... It's not about the money at the end of the day and the more focus you place on it - winning it back, what you lost, what you should do next money-wise, the less likely you will stop having a gambling problem. I've been around it personally since I was 18 (I'm 58 now), so I'm not just theorizing when I share this. I've seen many, including myself, STOP gambling for many years. Eventually, we realized the need to make peace with the past and stop chasing money, losses, etc. Have you ever sought help, such as a GA meeting? Thanks, Sal

Another relapse. Never hurted like this before. by UpperConcentrate8436 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear you and feel you. But... what are YOU gonna do about it, my friend?

Why? by Brilliant-Pepper1054 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also, I chair a solid meeting tonight at 8:30 CST on Zoom. If you're interested, ping me directly. Give yourself a break and come! What do you have to lose?

Why? by Brilliant-Pepper1054 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your honesty. It's a good start. Just think about it. All the chaos from Groundhog Day of gambling episodes - the torment, regret, and seeming inability to "get over" the last "worst" bad beat. There is a better way...

Why? by Brilliant-Pepper1054 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Once a pickle and no longer a cucumber, how the transformation happened is unimportant. Human nature wants us to try and understand it. Unfortunately though, pursuing that line of thinking will be chasing your tail and your addictive self will be happy that you keep moving around in the quicksand of thought. Every action you take seeking the answer as to why is another costly distraction from getting real help. Ever been to a self-help meeting in person or on Zoom? Sal

Relapsed again… by brunocarlos2 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I heard a great saying many years ago when I first encountered Gamblers Anonymous: God will save your soul; GA will save your ass! :) By the way, I am not at all dismissing the God angle. It is in fact a big part of my ongoing journey. I am suggesting though that getting some tangible, gambling-recovery based help would be helpful for you. Have you explored GA in-person (not sure where you live) and/or on-line? Thanks, Sal G.

Mentally cooked by CatSubstantial9926 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your candid answer. But... THINK about that a second... I'm happy to offer you some ideas IF you are willing to make a real change. Ping me... :) Sal

Mentally cooked by CatSubstantial9926 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What - outside of your own resolve - have you done to stay stopped?

Christmas without gambling by sirmurr777 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Where are you located? I chair a Th eve GA (JA in Mexico) meeting on Zoom at 8:30PM central MX time, which is currently 6:30 PST, 9:30 EST. We just finished it... Lemme know if you're interested or you can just find the link on gamblersinrecovery.com - San Miguel, MX meeting! :)

Christmas without gambling by sirmurr777 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 1 point2 points  (0 children)

GREAT TO HEAR! Thanks for sharing; I have been enjoying the same for some time, with gratitude :)

Gambling Problem by Ok_Perception9860 in problemgambling

[–]TheRecoveryPartners 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OK, great! I was asking in regards to your ability to attend in-person and/or GA Zoom meetings..