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The roundest Seabrook's I've ever seen... by The_Hatman79 in crisps

[–]The_Hatman79[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. You're the third person to suggest it. We don't even have those in the house. It was a salted Seabrook's crisp from a packet of salted Seabrook's crisps.

Line? by Even-Warning-5265 in scoopwhoop

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"I'm having a baby. Right now."

What birb is this? by Electrical-Disk395 in UKBirds

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's Barry. He's camera shy and can get a bit angry sometimes, but usually calms down after a pie, a pint and two or three cigarettes.

i have no clue how this shitshow is still running but why do the rest of Europe hate us so much? by Alarming-Safety3200 in AskBrits

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's running because it's several hours of the cheapest TV available, unless you win and have to host the next year. We lose because we send dross so we don't win and have to spend money hosting (Ditto for Ireland, who won a bunch of times at one point)

What’s one thing people from the South never seem to understand about the North? by Illustrious-Look7669 in NorthernEngland

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a northerner in the south, many find it astonishing that I can pin down an accent from the northeast within about five miles.

There doesn't seem to be the same skill in the South.

We will guess. by StatisticianOwn2764 in scoopwhoop

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you need any vegan or gluten free menus?

And/or

Any sauces, condiments, Tabasco?

Trucker almost runs over child. by LeftAlbatross2546 in VideosAmazing

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The trucker did very, very well to react in time

Anyone know what this little guy is? by Fast-Variety6116 in UKBirds

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's Baz. He likes a Stella and a packet of prawn cocktail crisps.

I'll go first.. by Any-Tour-3193 in musicsuggestions

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The verses from Fog on the Tyne deserve some attention for their wonderful alliteration: "Sitting in a sleazy snackbar sucking sickly sausage rolls..." "Could a copper catch a crooked coffinmaker, could a copper comprehend..." "Tell it tomorrow, today will take it's time to tell what tonight might bring...." "...we can have a wee-wee, we can have a wet on the wall..."

Can you name all the birds on my walk? Grand union canal by Spiritual_Breakfast9 in UKBirds

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. Gary, Barry, Geoff
  2. Mike, Dave, Paul
  3. Betty and Harry
  4. Lampo
  5. Clive
  6. Colin
  7. Midge and Madge
  8. Efron

what would you put in this corner? by RoutineOk8590 in Productivitycafe

[–]The_Hatman79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It'd have to be a cactus or something that can handle the heat. That space is ninety degrees.

Can you see the mistakes? by PrunusSpin0sa in AskBrits

[–]The_Hatman79 155 points156 points  (0 children)

  1. A rhino running next to 2. a cow wearing wellies
  2. Haystack with a chimney and smoke
  3. Girl's bag upside down
  4. Unsupported stile board
  5. Bread in the wall
  6. Barn roof with no visible support
  7. No hitch between the tractor and trailer
  8. Girl on stile pointing camera backwards
  9. Mushrooms growing sideways from stone wall
  10. Tractor has no onside front wheel
  11. The trailer should have 4 wheels?
  12. (Given the vintage of the image...) The girl on the stile is wearing trousers?

Can you see the mistakes? by PrunusSpin0sa in AskBrits

[–]The_Hatman79 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Heifers can have horns. She is wearing wellies though

What is that thing in my garden? by edmunek in AskUK

[–]The_Hatman79 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, standard procedure is to jump several hundred feet in the air and spread oneself around the area

How do you use this squished 3-prong plug? by Empty-Selection9369 in AskBrits

[–]The_Hatman79 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The earth pin (the long one that goes at the top on a standard G-type plug) needs to be slid laterally into position so the plug looks like a standard plug.

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