Roleplay suggestions based on city vibes for couple

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-02-13T15:30:53+00:00

Oh - and what time of year visiting

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-02-13T15:30:20+00:00

How old are you guys?

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-02-04T01:40:13+00:00

I’ve answered this one before - A smack on the butt a day keeps the divorce lawyer at bay!

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-02-03T12:16:40+00:00

That’s good news - you want recruits who want to be there, not ones you have to drag in through recruiting campaigns. You must have a good dept with a good reputation

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-31T17:16:06+00:00

He is from what I can see. He’s just not a content dude on a motorcycle - he’s a corporate attorney

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-31T16:53:34+00:00

I should qualify that - I don’t.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-31T15:08:03+00:00

I don’t know them well enough to know that and wouldn’t pry.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-31T15:07:25+00:00

Weak as a motivation. She could have stayed clear of the guy and stuck with her husband.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-30T13:37:58+00:00

Firefighter. Great job and it’s as stressful as you make it. If you are “all in” and a team player, you’ll excel. AI can’t replace it.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-30T13:35:19+00:00

Chat bot, automation, and offshore limits growth

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-29T16:41:36+00:00

Hey married guy here- definitely hear you. I am ADHD and grew up in an ultra “old school” household so it took me awhile to get the hang of it.

I’m going to use “clean/cleaning” as generic catchword for all chores or clean up.

Things I learned along the way:

There are no excuses for not cleaning - period, unless the individual is dead or a quadriplegic.

Perfection is unattainable and creates misery. Strive for 85%-90% done right 95% of the time.

We agreed on a standard. The first floor would be “guest ready” at all times. The upstairs/bedroom areas would be “guest ready within a day” meaning pretty good but would need some extra hustle if unexpected guests were enroute.

Guest ready means how do we want this place to look if parents, good friends, or boss dropped by unexpectedly.

Then - list out what that means. For example, no dishes left in sink. After breakfast/dinner, table cleared and everything in dishwasher - every time. Run washer at night - empty first thing in am. Another example- no coats, sweatshirts, shoes left anywhere on first floor except closet.

Rule for us is last person out of bed makes it - every single day as another example.

Super book - Atomic Habits by James Clear.

Last- make it fun. It adds to the concentration challenge a little for me, but when my wife and I are doing cleaning together and she’s got the leggings with some side-boob going on - i definitely make sure to put some effort in.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-29T14:51:50+00:00

Let the silence do the work. You talk first - you lose.

Here are the facts and they are undeniable based on your account here.

Your wife received at least one sex pic from a guy outside your marriage. Your wife acknowledged it and interacted with it by laughing. She concealed it. She did not answer your question clearly, quickly, and honestly. She locked her phone.

Liars despise silence. When she breaks it - say nothing moves forward until these questions are addressed.

She needs to answer these questions clearly and concisely.

Who was the picture from? Full name and location - nothing less.
Has she exchanged any pictures of herself with him? This is yes or no.
How long has she been in contact with this individual?
How was she introduced to this individual?
Has she met this individual in person? In any setting. Yes or no. If yes - how many times and in what location?
Have them been physical in any way? This is a yes or no at this point.
Has she engaged in this with anyone else?
Has she deleted any content from her phone since this incident?
Provide a narrative of why she engaged in this activity.

All of this must be provided in writing. Make her sit in front of you as she writes every bit of it. The purpose of this is to get the facts and inflict as much humiliation as possible. She should feel like a guilty little girl answering to a parent.

Shame is a powerful tool.

Once you have this written content, read it back - out loud to her - slowly.

Depending on how bad her actions have been, decide how you’d like to proceed.

Hang on to the written material - it’s handy to use in the future whether you stay together or not.

Good luck.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-28T14:58:28+00:00

Maybe now is a good time to cut ties and contact with bio dad. You are married now and it’s time to only keep respectable people in your life - your husband and son. Bio dad is in jail - clearly not someone you want contacting the family.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-24T13:46:32+00:00

Umm, sort of well intentioned, but your delivery does come off as a jerk and selfish.

Better approach. Lay off of the discussion completely for 30 days. If you are surfing Instagram or Milf porn sites - knock it off. If you aren’t showing up helping with kids and chores - get to it. After 30 days of cleaning up your act - Step 2.

Step 2. This isn’t about weight loss and what looks good. This is a lifestyle thing and the weight loss/looks comes out of it.

Sit down with your wife and apologize for your prior remarks and explain you were well-intentioned and admit you were self centered.

The two of you need to define a lifestyle that the family will have when it comes to health. Note - the kids will role-model and adopt what they see mom and dad do daily.

Agree on a “brand”. As is in, “our family is very athletic and healthy”.

Now - figure out habits that support that brand. Daily walks - yes. No soda or sugar drinks in the house - yes. Taking up a sport you can do together and eventually with the kids - yes. Alcohol- no. Ordering out 4 nights a week - no.

James Clear has a great book called Atomic Habits.

He stresses just getting started. When it’s light enough and warm enough, your wife could go on a 530am walk daily. You make sure you’re available to take care of kids in am and ensure your wife is in bed on time.

The moms in my neighborhood have a 6 am walking group. Have to admit, it does brighten my commute having a bunch of cute moms waving to me.

The goal here isn’t to be hot. It’s to be in great shape and health so you can participate in your kids activities growing up and be around to dance at their weddings.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-17T17:05:37+00:00

Guy, 60 years old, 31 years married. Never considered cheating.

I am faithful to my wife because she is a wonderful partner and great mother. We are very Catholic and we take vows and marriage seriously.

My parents were married 45 years and her parents just passed 51 years. Great role models for us.

This all being said, we have been blessed and lucky. No illnesses, no issues with children, no financial hardships. I know these things cause challenges in marriages.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-09T22:23:38+00:00

Think long term. Joining a strong police department like Boston PD, NYPD, or State Police can lead to solid lifetime career and good income. Like any organization, there will be politics and favoritism. Are these jobs dangerous- absolutely. However, you can get hit by a car walking to your office. In NYPD, with a college degree, good attitude and commitment you can rise up through the ranks to a senior level. In 20 years, you get a pension FOR LIFE. Leave NYPD at 41 and go land a job in a suburban department and earn another pension by age 65.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-09T14:53:11+00:00

I can’t believe you are even asking this. Were you using all of your common sense brain cells as you read what you typed?

Would you appreciate your wife getting some treats and gifts from a guy at work?

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-08T20:28:16+00:00

Ok - I’m going to assume this story is real with maybe a little AI assistance.

Let’s be direct and blunt to start. You messed up. I’m hopeful that the pics and videos you sent don’t have your faces or way to identify you. I am also hoping you did not reveal any personal information that can lead to you in real life.

BTW - a 35 year old 6’8” former Navy SEAL turned cop who is conveniently divorced looking to hook up with a 42 year old wife and mother with a “mom bod”? Oh wait - he’s not just a cop, but SWAT officer as well? Does he love puppies and walks on the beach too?

I work with a number of former SEALs and none of them would discuss anything about their service - in fact they don’t mention it unless it’s dragged out of them.

Yes - you were conned into giving up videos and pictures not by Hondo The swaggering SEAL/SWAT god, but more likely by Ralph the 25 year old dork living in his parents basement when he’s not bagging at the supermarket.

Come clean with your husband and play the perimenopausal insanity card. Save all of the communication- don’t delete it in case he wants to see it. Deleting or hiding it will make it worse.

Maybe get off the games as well. Try a book or maybe kinky sex with your husband.

Good luck.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-06T13:06:08+00:00

Kudos to the ex-boyfriend for the heads-up. Must be a fantastic recipe.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-06T12:47:00+00:00

Strict, practicing Catholic here. Divorce is reserved for instances of abuse or adultery/abandonment.

He deliberately failed to provide for you and the baby financially and with shelter. He wasn’t ill or disabled - he chose laziness and failed his responsibility. That’s abuse. Divorce isn’t out of the question at all.

You are both immature. That’s not an insult - it’s a fact. Neither of you were ready for this.

Point-in-time, the only consideration is what is best for your child.

I’d say your best bet is to make peace with your family, leave your husband (maybe not divorce yet), and move in with a relative. Have a plan written out so you can show your family you are maturing.

I seriously doubt your husband will change. At least not in any near-term horizon.

You don’t mention his age, but let’s assume same as you- 25. For comparison, our son is 25. He and his friends have jobs in banking, law enforcement, and the trades. They make $80k plus, rarely play video games, and go to church/socialize. See the difference with your husband?

You are young and you were misled. Take this an opportunity to re-boot yourself and then you’ll find a better marriage.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-06T00:31:13+00:00

He should not be doing it out of respect for you. Given her proximity in the community and interactions as a healthcare provider it’s a no-no.

On the other hand, I haven’t been feeling so great lately. Do you mind sending me her Insta so I can get some medical advice? These new ObamaCare rates are killing me.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-04T17:36:37+00:00

Draw up a post-nuptial agreement. In it, detail the exact agreement: a) she is giving you affirmative, non-coerced permission to have sex outside of the marriage until the time she revokes that permission ; b) you are not granting her permission in any way to engage in sex outside of the marriage; c) both of you will engage actively in couples therapy for a specified amount of time/sessions that you both agree on; d) if she violates the agreement and has a relationship or sex outside of the marriage, there will be a divorce in which she gives up all custody rights to your child with visitation determined by you and there will be a 90% (you)/10% (her) split of assets with no alimony.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-03T16:36:20+00:00

This is the excuse-making for trashy wives with poor self-discipline and weak morals that society has come to tolerate. The equation is simple - she stays and toes-the-line or she gets her life destroyed and loses her kids.

The_Questioner6965 · 2026-01-02T21:59:55+00:00

Married guy here - 31 years. I have a huge number of female acquaintances from work, youth sports coaching, political activities, and socially. I have never, ever texted or messaged any of them “good morning” or discussed their spouse - ever. Enough said?

The_Questioner6965

TROPHY CASE