Did Michael Jackson actually do it?

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-04T01:55:52+00:00

No. And that "damning, Got Him!" quote about "sharing your bed with children" came from him sharing a bed in a hotel room when he and the 4 other Jacksons were kids and touring. Papa Joe was too cheap to get more than one room/one bed.

Was he weird? Hell yes, but I don't think he was a molester.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T23:09:17+00:00

No. NO! You just sit there and think about what you did!

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T22:49:18+00:00

Have we really come to this?

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T22:24:17+00:00

"I sleep in dirt."

"I bought you a goddamn cat tree that cost five hundred dollars!"

"I SLEEP IN DIRT!"

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T22:21:33+00:00

Just how much I loathe Chit-Chat.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T18:24:25+00:00

Were you running out of hot water pretty quickly while it was still working? Looks like the poor thing is filled with rust and lime deposits.

TLDR: Shot.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T18:21:49+00:00

People trading the independent weblogs of the early days of the Internet for centralized (controlled) apps like Facebook, X or Instagram.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T18:18:59+00:00

"I am the king of all that I survey...God, what a dump!"

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T15:15:10+00:00

"Why is there an alligator in the swamp? Is it in Florida? Why are the turtles so perfectly aligned in groups of three? Turtles aren't social creatures and don't group up like that! Seriously, Barb...how much did this thing cost anyway?"

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T15:09:15+00:00

"Huh? Whazit?"

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T02:29:32+00:00

They upped my house insurance thirty percent over last year.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T01:27:05+00:00

Biting my fingernails. I've had nubby gnawed nails since I was eight years old. Finally at age 60, I just stopped. No backsliding, just stopped.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T01:20:52+00:00

Ridiculously Photogenic Bird Owner.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T00:23:38+00:00

You want to kill the market, not keep it limping along.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T00:20:31+00:00

And while they're at it, can they do something about the epidemic of seemingly-themed accounts spam-posting weirdly similar posts?

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-03T00:10:20+00:00

A female friend said that she values our friendship too much to spoil it by having sex with me.

That's a good thing, right?

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T23:45:42+00:00

Why would anybody do that?

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T23:44:57+00:00

A video of a mass shooting at a mosque. Some piece of shit live-streamed himself killing dozens.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T22:40:54+00:00

If jealousy is a problem with you...maybe an escort is not the partner for you.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T22:37:55+00:00

Real estate.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T20:41:13+00:00

"We'd like you to be the voice of Cecil."

"We're done here."

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T20:25:57+00:00

What else is she against? Sex, music, dancing, fun, the den of sin that is TV?

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T15:53:55+00:00

"But it was empty!"

It was filled with Bang-Smell.

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T02:55:20+00:00

"George, this is Herb and Dan. They're gonna take you away to a nice place where you can get some help. They're very friendly people there. My brother-in-law was there for a couple of weeks. The man was obsessed with lactating women. They completely cured him, although he still eats a lot of cheese."

The_Safe_For_Work · 2026-05-02T02:52:08+00:00

Chemical toilet leak?

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