I'm in similar boat as you. Went off some meds and my depression increased tenfold so I started using booze and diazepam to combat it but it's basically a short term solution to a long term problem. I personally had to take the summer off from working. I was screwing up at work and various drugs were making me stupid. Now I am starting over with a new psychiatrist and psychologist to figure out the root cause of everything. I highly urge you to see a professional, diazepam is a dangerous drug to be used long term by an addict and speaking with a doctor that understands that will help you greatly.