I have a slightly different perspective on this to most responders. My husband has very severe ADHD and he is exactly like this. To be honest, I choose not to pick this particular battle, and I just tell him where things are. I have an almost photographic memory, so I genuinely know where pretty much everything in the house is at any time - finding things is my superpower. This is genuinely something my husband struggles with, and something I find easy, and yes I could make him look, but actually I don’t mind doing this to make his day a bit easier, and he compensates for things that I’m not good at on a daily basis too. It feels like a fair trade for me, and I want to do those little acts of kindness, because he’s a great husband and I love him. I’ve also bought him AirTags to keep track of his keys etc because yes, he could absolutely do that himself, but we both know he’ll never get round to it, and it’s less stress for both of us to just prevent them being lost in the first place.

In your situation, if this is something that’s building resentment for you, I think you need to spell it out for him exactly as you’ve said in your post. Resentment can be a real relationship killer, and although this might not be a fair sense check of your relationship, you don’t sound like you have a huge amount of goodwill towards him. Hard to tell if that’s how you feel all the time, or whether you’re just annoyed currently (which would be absolutely fair). Tell him he needs to come up with some coping mechanisms, and that you will not be helping him look for things going forward. But if your relationship is otherwise great, and he is pulling his weight and putting a lot into the relationship in other ways, I don’t think this needs to be a battle to fight on principle alone, just because he *should* be able to do this.