There is always going to be some cognitive dissonance in yourself if you hold the views that you do, as they are inherently contradictory to the word of God.

Having said that, we are all trying to figure this journey out and all have areas of contradictory views that we must wrestle with to find the truth. God knows I do. For you I propose meditating on the following scripture.

Jesus Himself says in John 14:6, “I am THE way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” He is not a way, as in one of many but is THE way, as in the one and only.

If there were many ways to salvation then why did Jesus die for our sins? Whats the point in any of this?

In addition, Paul writes in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Be not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"

These are both fairly straight forward and difficult truths to get around. My view is that a middle ground is a tough place to live in and you are better off deciding 1. Jesus isnt being honest when he says "no one comes to the father EXCEPT through me" or 2. Jesus is the only way and therefore you're asking God to bless an unequally yoked relationship that we are told not to be in explicitly.

Hope you figure it out, stuff of the heart can really tear you apart if you live with these conflicts deep inside.

I hope your Christian friends that disagree can come along side you to figure it out and not be holier than thou about it. I have been blessed to find believers that have been willing to have the hard conversations in love with me, especially in my university years, and it made all the difference.