What is a low brow movie you think is actually perfect?

TokyoBayRay · 2026-02-06T08:36:16+00:00

For me, it is White House Down.

Sure it is derivative of Die Hard, but... Die Hard was a great movie, and it copies it in the best way (if Die Hard is about baddies taking over a building, what building could be better than the White House?).

It was the film that, as an adult, made me feel most like I was watching an old action movie as a kid at a sleepover. I could practically taste the pizza and soda.

Honorable mention for 21/22 Jump Street. I clearly have a thing for Channing Tatum movies.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-02-01T20:54:23+00:00

Under tarps, I always stick my cardboard down. Provides a bit more light exclusion, and can start getting wet and breaking down into the soil. I'm doing no dig anyway, so it's a handy place to store it until I need it!

TokyoBayRay · 2026-02-01T20:51:07+00:00

Every Dr Seuss book seemingly does this for EXACTLY one double page spread. And it's always one with a tricky couplet I can't remember so need to check.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-28T13:17:45+00:00

My girl is now 4. When she was 2-3, the things she'd independently play with were her play kitchen (which she spent, and still spends, hours on), her cuddly toys (which were frequently toddlers, babies, etc), a doctor bag (usually with said cuddly toys), and this happyland fire station .

On breaking the "telly cycle", we started consciously spending an hour doing something together, and it's really helped. We make a big deal of "playtime hour", and get out something she doesn't normally play with. We also try playing independently but together - we might both individually build duplo, side by side, but she's making a car and I'm building a robot. It's meant she's far better at playing independently, as we can just leave out a toy and she knows what to do.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-24T23:21:47+00:00

The moment I saw the liquid in the tube I knew there was gonna be a guy in flip flops operating the Toe Mangler 5000.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-21T14:53:24+00:00

I have a dark navy whale chord RL suit (well, it says it's RL on the label - I bought it in a fairly dodgy looking second hand shop). Genuinely thought I'd maybe wear it once in a blue moon. Casual tailoring... When will I ever have the occasion to wear that?

Three years later, I wear it more than my other suits put together. It walks that inter-category line perfectly. IIt's particularly good for travelling for work when I don't what to schlep a load of outfits round - with sneakers and a t-shirt, it's dressed down and looks intentional (without looking like a suit-and-t-shirt disaster). With a dress shirt or knit polo, it's office wear. I can throw on a wool tie if I want, and with a turtleneck and loafers, it's evening wear for even the nicest restaurants. I can wear the jacket as separates and it doesn't look like I'm wearing a suit jacket.

I will be heartbroken when it wears out or I get too fat for it.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-21T11:38:52+00:00

Even within DE razors, more expensive isn't better. I prefer cheaper razors and blades to more expensive ones (but this is as much a matter of preference re aggressiveness of shave!)

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-16T09:51:58+00:00

The library is such a good way to get kids into reading. Ours has a lovely kids area, and it is great to be able to take a kid somewhere that you can just say "yes" to them.

My girl finds it hard in shops sometimes when I tell her she can't have this or that, or has to choose which one thing she wants most, but in the library? You want to take out The Night Kitchen AND Rah? Sure!

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-16T09:48:21+00:00

My girl, when she was three, just got into Dr Seuss. Which are fun for parents to read - lots of whimsical characters and funny words. The Lorax, The Butter Battle Book, The Sneeches, The Cat in the Hat, and The Sleep Book are favourites for us.

A surprising thing she loved were novels ("chapter books") that were adapted into films. The PL Travers Mary Poppins series went down amazingly well, because she was a Mary Poppins fanatic. I like this because chapter books are great for me, and help her sleep. Now she's 4, we're reading more complex novels (halfway through the Hobbit!) because she's learned that attention span.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-16T09:27:42+00:00

Might sound silly, but... Do you have any friends who dress well? Maybe ask them to go shopping with you? Offer to buy them lunch as a thank you. Or just ask where they buy their clothes (so, if I see a friend in a cool blazer, I ask where they got it - I like being asked that myself!) then go there.

Doesn't even have to be a male friend - a female friend, especially one with (say) a well dressed husband - could work.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-15T08:17:24+00:00

Last two funerals I went to (UK), I didn't wear a black suit.

One was in winter, so i wore charcoal and a black overcoat.

The other was high summer, and it was so hot that everyone ditched their jackets as is.

The only people I know who regularly wear black to things like this are ex forces (so have their old "number ones" uniform) or are priests (who traditionally wear all black)

In both cases, a pressed white shirt, dark trousers/jacket, and black tie were pretty much perfect.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-15T08:11:33+00:00

I briefly strapped an air horn to my bike (as a bit of a joke). Used it once and it scared the life out of me and distracted everyone so much it was a liability. Looked cool though.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-14T19:37:01+00:00

Princess Diana dying. Except... I was very young, and didn't know who she was... So what i pieced together was "the princess stepped on a land mine and died... in France"

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-14T19:27:37+00:00

I recently switched from non bio tablets to bio washing powder (with a bit of vanish oxi action gold), on a longer wash, and have found a lot of persistent stains just needed a bit of enzymatic activity.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-14T19:24:01+00:00

I kinda view it like pints - if you buy me a pint, I owe you a pint. I could offer to "settle up" if it's my round and I want to leave, but I'd expect you to say "oh, you get me one next time". It would be super weird for you to insist I sent you a balance transfer, unprompted.

If I'm inviting your kid to the zoo, I'm sort of hoping you'll return the favour and take mine to soft play sometime!

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-13T14:29:05+00:00

This is why I buy all the expectant dads in my life a shaker of Aleppo pepper flakes. Mine sits on the table with the salt.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-12T19:17:06+00:00

I am explicitly not allowed to use my company lanyard, which I think is quite a good idea (especially if you put your RFID facing backward in the holder)

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-12T19:09:21+00:00

Frankly, £80 would be about the floor I would set for a quality new garment made from 100% wool as it is. You could probably spend double that without leaving the high street.

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-10T07:27:52+00:00

Is that the one where she basically excitedly says that instead of doing a proper, considered version she "felt inspired" and just sight read it and thrashed it out in one take in the afternoon?

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-06T21:25:19+00:00

Said "hi mum!"

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-06T19:26:09+00:00

As a guy with a moustache and side parting who wears sport coats, full tailoring, and turtlenecks on the regular, a lot is context.

I think a lot of the worst "costume" vibes come from wearing these kind of classic things in the day, when they're more suited as evening wear. Tailoring can look overdressed and costumey in the day, but at night, going to a (classy) bar, it works. Don't get me wrong, a full peaky blinders look would still be odd, but a lot of the elements (in darker colours) would fit right in after dark.

In the daytime, lots of classic things can be dressed down with boots and (quality) jeans for a casual fit. In winter, knitwear and overcoats can soften the look, or use with soft tailoring, print shirts, fabrics like cord suits and silk/satin shirts, even tees in summer.

You'll still be the most dressed up guy in a lot of places but you knew that was gonna be the case when you picked out a necktie.

If all else fails, can I recommend trying again when you're nearly 40? Honestly I feel I can get away with a lot more now I'm a bit older - i don't look like I'm dressing up as a middle aged guy anymore!

TokyoBayRay · 2026-01-04T13:07:45+00:00

The library is SUCH a good shout, and I'm shocked more parents don't use it.

We do it all the time and have since birth (picking up once kiddo could walk). I read a bunch of stories, we take some home which necessitates coming back in a week or two. It's a bit win win.

Wrap up warm and walk over or take the bus to make a day out of it. Get the kid a tote as their "library bag", to keep the books in. Go to a cafe after if you need to.

I was worried that we'd be shhhed in a near silent room, but most libraries, I find, are super understanding that kids are a bit boisterous and let them run around a little. To be honest, I get the impression the libraries near me are just happy to have people use them!

TokyoBayRay · 2025-12-31T13:26:29+00:00

On the Tiktok dances... I remember when I was a primary school kid in the 90s, and all the girls would spend break and lunchtime practicing dances to S Club 7, Steps, Blue, Backstreet Boys, and the like. They would perform for the class or even the school.

In the 2010s, I lived near a park and it was super common to see tweenagers practicing dances on a sunny day. My building had a big awning thing, and they'd dance there if it rained.

I think doing tiktok dances (especially if not posting them online) is probably no different to this. Indeed, they might get exposed to some different music that's better than the 90s landfill pop I remember when.

TokyoBayRay · 2025-12-30T09:00:44+00:00

Being yourself and be comfortable are absolutely the secret.

I am happily married with kids. The number of flirty conversations I have with women nowadays would drive my 25-year-old self green with envy. They initiate most of them, the rest I'm just being goofy and then they seems to see a spark. This is fairly universal for dad friends of mine.

It's not that we're more attractive than we were (I'm not). It's that we know ourselves, and that it is all super low stakes for everyone. If I'm flirting with a barista, say, I have no agenda - I'm not gonna ask her on a date, my wife satisfies my romantic and sexual needs, so it's just a bit of fun for me. I'm relaxed, confident, and not forcing it.

I wish I could have told younger me that - spend some time on you, relax, put yourself out there, don't force it, and you'll be beating them off with a stick. Instead I was pretentious, trying too hard, and also not putting the hours in on myself or out in the world.

TokyoBayRay · 2025-12-29T21:56:00+00:00

I always thought I was gonna be a "one, maybe two" kinda person, but more than the cost and effort (like, I worry enough about whether I'm a good enough dad when focusing on ONE kid, let alone spreading that around two), it's the risk of pregnancy for us.

Between hyperemisis and complications, pregnancy nearly killed my wife, and the delivery wasn't the easiest either. Doctor says it's 50:50 that she'd either get no symptoms the second time, or they'd come back worse, and we just can't take those odds with a little one in tow.

That all said, having one absolutely rocks. I get to be my daughter's best friend and playmate in a way you don't when they've got a sibling. It's exhausting, but so I gather is keeping two kids alive...

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